Now or Never
by Xxbroken.angel.wingsxX
Summary: One mistake has Mitchie needing to grow up — fast. Can she handle it? Or is it just too much for a 16-year-old to be having Shane Gray’s baby? Smitchie. R&R!
1. Alone

**Yay! It's finally up. I made a LOT of changes. You'll figure them out as the story goes on.**

**Summary****: One mistake has Mitchie needing to grow up—fast. Can she handle it? Or is it just too much for a 16-year-old to be having Shane Gray's baby? Smitchie.**

"Pick up, just pick up!" I willed my phone.

"Hey, you've reached Shane's voice—"

"You idiot!" I screamed into the receiver and slammed the phone shut.

_Why is he like this?_

**-Flashback-**

It happened at Connect Three's album release party. Everyone was dancing and having fun while the DJ blasted the music as loud as it could go. Shane and I kept going back for cup after cup of punch. With the bitter taste clearly evident, I knew it was spiked and so did Shane, we just kept downing the drinks.

"This stuff is amazing!" I yelled to Shane, trying to overpower the blaring speakers.

"I know!" he yelled back.

"I'm tired of dancing…"

"What?"

"Oh, come on!" I grabbed his hand and yanked him off the dance floor, to the limo out back that had been waiting for us.

"Where are we going?" Shane asked, in a dazed voice, the alcohol finally hitting him.

"You'll see," I answered, still pulling him towards the vehicle. I had never been drunk ever in my entire life and yet, my body took the drug quite well.

Shane groaned.

"Come on!" I tugged on his arm, pushing him toward the door of the vehicle.

"What's the rush, babe?" he asked, poking at the door like it was the most amusing thing.

"Oh, no rush. I just wanted to do _this_." When we both hopped in the backseat, I jumped on Shane's lap and kissed him fiercely. Our hands searched each other's bodies and roamed all over. I was seducing him without knowing exactly what I was doing. It was kind of sad; I was able to become completely sexy while I was drunk, but I had to make out with a pillow more than once just to make sure I didn't chew off the guy's lips?

We continued slobbering all over each other, making out.

After that, I could hardly breathe with the lack of oxygen.

"You wanna come to…my hotel room?" I whispered in a sexy voice as soon as my breathing calmed.

"Hell... yes."

**-20 minutes later-**

"Are you sure about this?" Shane asked for the hundredth time.

"Yes, I am. Stop asking me that!" I replied.

Our bodies were tangled in the sheets on my hotel bed. The farther the kissing went, the more heated the room got, and in all honesty, I didn't feel like this was a mistake during the whole thing.

Soon, I felt something bulging and growing beneath me. I looked down and blushed when it hit realization what _it_ was.

Before I knew it, our clothes were flying off furiously and Shane is looking down at me, smiling with a twinkle in his eye.

"Now I'm going to ask you one more time—" Shane started.

"Yes, I'm sure. Just go already!"

And then it was done. The pain was over in no time, and we began showing just how much love we felt for each other. Or maybe was it lust?

**-End of Flashback-**

I could only remember the constant repetition of him asking me was sure. Maybe that was what stung the most: I couldn't even remember the first time I'd ever done it with a guy, especially when it was the man I felt so strongly for. I knew that a lot of pain occurred, but my mind could only hold so much while I was at an intoxicated level.

In the early hours of the morning right after it happened, I found myself naked in bed all by myself in the hotel room. I was so mad and a part of me felt that way because I had that gut feeling that nothing would ever be the same between us again, and I was right.

Shane spoke to me differently. Well, not so much differently, but like it never even happened. I wished we hadn't, due to the complications it caused and the broken promise that I made to my parents and God, but knowing that we did, I still wanted him to acknowledge it like he really loved me that much. It kind of felt like one of those moments where the guy you're in love with angers you and you run away; you kind of want to be alone, and yet, you want so badly for him to come chasing after you as if the fact that you were mad at him didn't change how he felt about you.

Ever since Connect Three started laying down new tracks for their new album, Shane hadn't been around for much. He left for his beach house in Los Angeles two months ago to finish it up. He visited; I just didn't see him as much as I usually did since he lives next door and he went to the same school as I did. When he invited me to go to the album release party, I was thrilled, partially because that meant he would be around more often since the record was done and partially because I'd meet some pretty honorary people in the music industry there.

Everything with paparazzi simmered down a little with him gone, and so it was much quieter around. I started reading some of those corny romance novels about the guy treating the girl so wonderfully after they had sex for the first time. The guy is supposed to hold the girl and tell her how much she means to him, _not_ jump on a plane two days later and jet off to Europe for three consecutive weeks because he's doing a tour. I wanted my story to have a fairytale ending, or at least an ending that modeled a corny romance novel. As much as Shane did tell me how much he loved me, it didn't feel the same.

It just seemed so unfair, so unjust. They made it sound so amazing and romantic on TV and in movies. Why couldn't my life turn out like that?

It's like learning that every movie out there about making love is corrupt the hard way. I didn't care if that was true or not because the truth still remained at the end of the rainbow. Not that there was even rainbow anywhere near me in a 200 mile radius, seeing as my life was at first going downhill, but now it's slowly crashing to rock bottom.

What's so special about your boyfriend leaving you two days after you guys had sex? What's so romantic about being drunk during your first time so you can barely even remember what happened? And the thing that interested me the most, what's so awesome about the five pregnancy tests lying in front of you that are all but one reading positive?

This is what I wanted to know.

I sat on my bed, wondering what I was going to do. I didn't have too many options. With my legs tucked in my body and my chin gently resting on my knees, I held up a framed picture of Shane and me. It was actually four pictures. There was a normal-sized one in center and three that were much smaller lined up on the right. On the one in the center, we were dangling their feet over the dock at the lake and holding hands. It was taken from behind so you could only see my head resting on his shoulder, watching the beautiful sunset. The other three were just pictures of us goofing off at the beach. Remy, my brother's girlfriend also my best friend, had snapped the fourth shot at the exact moment when smiles lit up both our faces as we danced in the sand.

_If only we could be like that forever_, I silently told myself.

I knew Shane had to keep his phone off in Europe, and it would cost me a fortune if he actually did pick up. Still, it's already been two and a half weeks since he left and I wasn't sure if I missed him because I wanted to give him a piece of my mind, or if it was because I needed him. Either way, his presence was missing and I missed him.

I went to my bathroom to clean up. I was a complete mess. Crying for the last two hours didn't do much good.

Then, finally, the miraculous ringing made my phone come alive.

I rushed back to my bed to get it. I actually had to think twice about picking up, even after all those calls I had made to him.

"Mitchie?"

**Okay, so I promised myself that this time around, I would finish the story on my own before posting it. But I gave in. I didn't want to keep you waiting.**

**How was it? Any suggestions for future chapters? Feedback :)**


	2. Unsure

**Thanks for the reviews :) I really enjoy reading them. Anyway, this one was a little short because it's another filler chapter, kind of.**

I froze up in the moment. Suddenly I wasn't sure what to say to him anymore. I was torn between breaking into sobs and telling him how much I hated him for leaving me or pretending like nothing was wrong.

"What?" I said pretty harshly. I felt like I didn't know him anymore. After all, I haven't had a normal conversation with him for the last three months; even at the album release party—other than when that little "incident" occurred—people constantly wanted his attention, so I stood by his side and talked to Nate the entire time.

"I'm sorry," Shane softly said, like he actually meant it.

"What?" I said again, but not harshly. He took me by surprise. Was he seriously apologizing to me now?

"Look, I really have to go, but just know that I'm sorry and I love you," he actually whispered this time.

The line went dead.

I stood there with facial soap dripping down my face, staring blankly at the gray Razr in front of me.

Whenever he said those three words, I couldn't help but to completely melt and fall for him all over again. As much as I hated when this happened, I realized that I still had a big problem in front of me. Or technically, inside me.

"Mitchie, breakfast!" My mom called from downstairs. I'd already eaten seeing as I snuck out of the house at four in the morning to buy the pregnancy tests.

"One minute!" I called back.

After I finished washing my face and brushing my teeth, I shoved all the pregnancy tests in a shoe box and stuck it directly beneath my bed.

I put on the fake smile I'd been using for the last few months and went downstairs.

My mom laid out a plate of eggs, bacon, biscuits, and toast for me. I still felt a little queasy from the morning's events, so I picked at the food a little and took a bite of toast.

"Are you okay, honey?" my mom asked once she sat down and realized I barely ate anything.

"Yeah, of course. I'm just not that hungry today."

"Missing Shane again?"

"Yeah, sure," I muttered.

"You can't let this boy distract you from your life, you know."

I nodded. She was partially right, except for the fact that he was going to distract me no matter what now that I'm carrying his baby. I cringed at that thought.

I wrenched some eggs and bacon down my throat to make it look like I was fine, like everything was okay. Even though I was about ready to slowly commit suicide with a toothbrush.

Then, I felt this churning in my stomach and bile making its way back up. Without having to think about it, I ran to the bathroom and shoved my head into the toilet to puke out everything I had just eaten.

"Uh, Mom?" I called.

She rushed in and gasped at the fume.

"I think I'm—" I got that churning feeling again and stuck my head in the bowl to throw up once more. "—sick."

"Do you think it was something you ate before? Because breakfast tasted fine to me."

"No," _much worse_, I added in my head. "I probably just ate too fast."

"You don't have to go to school today, but I have to work."

"Okay, bye Mom. Love you."

"Love you, too." She left.

I stayed in bed for a major fraction of the day, making lists, thinking thoughts, and generally feeling sorry for myself.

My Razr beeped.

I got a text from Shane saying how sorry he was, only to find out that he was sorry for not saying goodbye.

Reading the last one he sent, I became really depressed. How could he forget the night I lost my virginity to him? Or more so, the night _he_ lost his virginity to _me_?

Before, I never truly understood why people say they "lost" their virginity to someone. You never actually misplaced it. A more suiting term would be to give your virginity away. But for me, it's like I blindly handed it to someone I trusted, and they left it on a shelf to collect dust. Now, I finally got what it meant. That feeling of emptiness was so familiar to me already. I knew what it felt like to feel like you're missing a part of you, even though physically, you're all put together.

I threw the phone across the room. It hit the wall and the back of it flew out. I took a deep breath to calm my anger and got back under my comforter.

I took a framed picture of Shane eating a huge lollipop at a Willy Wonka candy store from my nightstand.

_He's not worth it_, I repeatedly told myself. The problem was that he was completely worth it. I was in love with him for God's sake! I was pretty sure he loved me back, too. He just stopped acting like he did.

"I hate you, but I love you and now, and I'm almost starting to hate that I love you. I need you to be there for me through this. I can't go through it alone," I said, gently tapping the glass where his face was. Warm tears flowed down my cheek. I shook off the tears and scoffed at myself. "How pathetic is this? I'm talking to your picture since I can't say it to your face."

I sent the frame flying next to my phone. The glass shattered into a million pieces, kind of like what Shane did to my heart.

Right as it got completely quiet in my house, my door started creaking open. I had no idea who on earth it could be seeing as both my parents were at work and my brothers had already gone off to school with their friends.

I felt a little loopy as I looked up, but I managed to see that it was Shane.

"Surprise," he said, while standing right in front of me. He was wearing a striped, blue and white polo.

I blinked a few times before it hit me that he was _actually_ here. "Oh, um, hey Shane. One second," I said as I pulled my covers over my head so I could do some serious breathing exercises. I escaped me that he knew that our spare key was hidden under the mat outside the front door.

On the subject of having sex… Yeah, I think I'll just avoid that. It's not like I want to bring it up, but we'd have to talk about it eventually. If I was given the choice of 'sooner or later' right then and there, I chose later. I didn't feel like pretending everything was all right either, because that would just make me look and feel desperate.

I showed my face again and sighed.

Shane looked confused. "Aren't you supposed to be in school?"

"Aren't you supposed to be in Europe?" I wished he would've come back a little later. All I wanted was a little time to sort things out in my head. I mean, come on! Isn't there a law that says that within 24 hours of when a teenage girl finds out she's pregnant, the father of the baby can't be around? Well, probably not, but they should totally make it.

He looked at me sadly.

"No, I'm glad you're back. I'm just a little surprised, that's all," I quickly added. "I'm not at school because I'm sick."

"Oh, I'm sorry. I hope you feel better."

"Yeah. So… why'd you come back?"

"I live like, right next door. And I missed you."

"I missed you, too," I answered automatically. I was lying in a way because now that he's around again, I'm going to feel even worse about my mistakes. I feel bad enough having to look at the purity ring on my left hand every day, but now with Shane, there are two of them.

"I missed you more." He came to join me in my bed. "So how've you been?"

"Apart from being sick, great. Amazing. Terrific. Fantastic. Never felt better in my entire life," I fibbed. I was pretty sure he could take a hint at my sarcasm, though.

"Hey, are you mad at me?" he asked, suddenly.

"Why would you think that?"

"Well, your phone is over there," he pointed, "in two pieces and the frame for the picture of us at the candy place is all cracked and broken."

"I'm just stressed with schoolwork and all the people trying to be my friend just to get to you. On top of that, I really did miss you." I reached over and cupped his cheek. "I'm not mad at you, really."

So what if it wasn't exactly true? Then again, I practically forgave him already after melting into those deep, brown eyes of his.

"Okay," Shane said, lying on his back next to me. "I love you. Sorry if I don't say it enough."

I nodded. "It's okay, I know you do. I love you, too."

I felt alright for about a moment or two before I caught a glimpse of his purity ring.

"If you don't mind, I'm going to fall asleep here in a moment. I have a bit of jet lag," he said, snuggling into my right side.

He looked cute when he slept, as creepy as that sounds. I'd hate to destroy that smile on his face, but I'd have to tell him that he has a kid on the way eventually. I would probably tell someone else like Remy or Nate or one of my two brothers first.

I personally didn't know why I was so afraid to tell Shane. It wasn't like he would just stop loving me all of a sudden. I couldn't decide if I was more scared of Shane not wanting the baby or not wanting me anymore. Either way, I was still afraid about my future, his future, the baby's future, and everything else in between that.

**I think the chapters will be longer. Feedback, please. :)**


	3. Telling

**Sorry about the delay. Anyway, Camp Rock didn't happen. That's one of the things I changed.**

I was in my room, thinking things over the next day since Shane left in the morning to the studio to record some solo songs. I had convinced my mom that I still felt sick and that I shouldn't have to go to school feeling ill.

I had nothing better to do, so I reached far under my bed and pulled out my old sketchpad. It had that old, dusty smell to it. I had been so distracted by Shane and everything around me that I totally forgot about all the things I enjoyed doing.

I also pulled out the box of pregnancy tests just because I couldn't stand just leaving the truth under my bed. If there was anything I learned throughout life, it would be that I can't escape reality. I was going to have to face it sooner or later. Plus, I liked drawing the most meaningful things in my life, and though this is fate of mine is pretty much unwanted, I needed to deal with it.

I started with the basic oval-like shape and worked my way to drawing it. The hardest part was the idiotic little plus sign at one end of the stick. It wasn't that I couldn't draw a cross; I just couldn't stand knowing that the same plus sign popped up four out of five times on five different pregnancy test brands.

Halfway through the drawing, I couldn't help but cry. It got the paper a little wet, but that didn't matter as much to me as facing the fact that I was going to have a _baby_.

After the devil stick was completed, I shoved the entire sketchpad back under the bed. I couldn't believe I just drew what I drew. Instead of making me feel better by accepting the truth, it did the exact opposite. I was feeling about a hundred percent worse than before.

It was about four-ish when I realized I had to go over to Remy's house. Nate and my older brother, Jake, would probably be there, too.

I reluctantly climbed out of bed, threw on some comforting sweatpants and a hoodie, and walked out the door. I also brought my iPod and some sunglasses to distract myself from the random paparazzi hiding in their cars parked on the curb, trying to get every picture they can of Shane and/or me.

It was only a few streets into the neighborhood behind mine. I knocked and Remy happily answered the door.

She greeted me with a hug. "I can't believe you still came even though you're sick. I missed you at school today. I hope you're feeling better."

"I am; thanks." I walked past her and into her living room. I used to come over so often that I practically lived here. But ever since Shane was in my life, I started going over to his house and everything was weird. I plopped onto the couch beside Nate. "Hey Jake, hey N—"

Nate leaned over and smothered me in a hug. "Thank God you're here!" He started clinging onto my hoodie.

"Why?" I asked, looking down at him weirdly.

He pulled back and pointed at Remy and Jake on the other couch across the room like they were suspects in a crime.

"Those two lovebirds were making out like there was no tomorrow," he said bluntly.

Jake thinks he has this older sibling responsibility over me, so he isn't as intimate with Remy when I'm around. I'd probably puke if they did have a "heated moment" around me, but I could really care less. Jake is in college, and he's moderately attractive, but I still have _no idea_ what Remy sees in him.

"Feeling better?" Jake asked.

"Sure," I said. My stomach growled at me. I hadn't really eaten anything today.

I got up to go on a hunt for food in her refrigerator. I found a toaster strudel in the freezer so I tossed it into the toaster and waited.

Jake walked in the kitchen.

"How are you doing, sis?" he asked me.

"I've been better…"

"Why, what's wrong?"

"Well Shane's back from…Europe," I started off. My conversations with my older brother were brief and awkward nowadays. WE used to be the best of friends, but ever since he went off to college, I've been closer to Gavin, my younger brother. I kind of missed him.

"What did he do this time?" he asked, putting on his over protective brother face. Our mutual acquaintance could also possibly be because he was always overprotective.

"He didn't do anything. I just missed him and things never just stay the same anymore. Everyone is always leaving and coming back and leaving again. It gets annoying." I think Jake was smart enough to know I was sort of aiming that remark towards him. I know it wasn't his fault that he needed a college education, but every time he _did_ get a break now and then, he'd always end up either here, at Remy's, or at one of his buddies' houses.

"A quiet, unchanging life is gonna be pretty hard to maintain especially if you have a rock star as your boyfriend. And I'm sorry for not being around. I didn't know it affected you that much." He walked up to me and tucked a piece of hair behind my ear.

"It's okay," I said.

"You look sick, you know. Or maybe just tired. You want some coffee or aspirin?" he asked, going for the medicine box on top of the fridge.

"No, no! I feel fine," I lied. I might as well take care of my baby and not take any risks since I heard pregnant women need to contact their doctors and discuss consumption of over-the-counter drugs and caffeine. I cringed at the words _my baby_.

Jake paused. "You sure?"

"Positive."

"Okay, then." He grabbed three cans of Coke from the food pantry and went back into the living room.

My toaster strudel jumped up from the toaster. I waited a few minutes so they could cool down due to being too lazy to grab a plate and eating it off of that.

It was unusually quiet, so I turned the radio on to keep myself company. I leaned up against the counter, quietly eating my toaster strudel, humming along to the generic pop song that was playing.

--

It had been two weeks and I hadn't made any progress with my life. I was being signed to a record label a few months ago and I was supposed to give them my demo CD within the next week, but I just couldn't do it anymore. I couldn't handle the fact that if I actually did make it somewhere in the music industry, I wouldn't be able to do that and have a baby at the same time.

I didn't even begin to think about adoption, keeping the baby, or anything else that involves my future.

If I'm not tough enough to tell Shane, I can at least tell Remy and Nate.

I forced myself to press 'send' pressing Remy's speed dial number. The tone rang twice, then finally.

"Hello?" Remy answered, sounding like she was trying to catch her breath.

"Remy?"

"Yeah," she replied. I could hear ruffling in the background. She was probably making out with Jake once again.

"Is Nate there, too? With Jake and you?"

"How did you know that Jake was—"

"Just answer my question," I cut her off.

"Yeah, why?"

"Can you guys come over? I kind of need to talk to you and Nate," I said. I rarely ever told them to come over to talk instead of just saying it over the phone, so Remy could probably sense something wrong.

"Uh, sure. I guess. I'll be over in ten." She hung up.

I could see Remy and Nate practically racing up my driveway. They pounded on my door until they realized it was unlocked.

"Mitchie, are you okay?" Nate asked.

Remy was clutching her car keys in her hand, looking a little nervous.

"That depends. Define _okay_," I said gently tapping my knee.

Remy sat beside me on my bed. "Well, Nate and I both know there is something serious happening, since you've been acting _really_ weird for the past few weeks, ever since that album-release party. What's wrong?"

I tried to hold it together, to be strong, but who was I kidding? I was the last person that should have to be strong. I started crying.

"Everything. _Everything_ is wrong," I forced out through tears. Remy went to go get some tissues as Nate sat on the other side of me. He put my head on his shoulder.

When she came back, Remy handed me the tissues.

"What do you mean?" she asked, while rubbing my back, trying to calm me down.

I just shook my head slowly, unable to form the words.

I wiped away a few of the tears with my hands, sat up straight, and took a deep breath. I started with the less shocking news first.

It wouldn't be a total shock, right? I mean Remy was a year older than me and while she and my brother were dating, Jake's purity ring came off… She probably wasn't a virgin either. I didn't think Nate owned a purity ring, so I just assumed that maybe he had already had sex, too. He has had some serious relationships in the past, after all.

"I'm not exactly a virgin anymore…" I said slowly, carefully watching their facial expressions.

Remy's mouth dropped wide open and Nate looked like he suddenly grew bug eyes.

"What?" Remy asked. I'm pretty sure she heard what I said, though.

"I lost my virginity," I repeated.

"When?"

"At that album-release party."

"_At_ the album-release party?" she echoed.

"No! _Not_ at the album-release party literally, but afterward."

She looked at me. "That was almost a month ago, why are you only telling us now? I would think you'd tell your best friends first. Plus, you don't seem destroyed because of that _minor_ detail you kind of forgot to mention to Nate and me."

"You both didn't tell me when you lost _your_ virginities!"

Nate looked at me. "Just because I don't feel like wearing my purity ring doesn't mean I'm not pure." He looked at Remy.

"I'm still a virgin," she said, holding her hands up like she was surrendering to something.

"Wait, you're both virgins?!"

"Yeah," they mumbled together.

"But why doesn't Jake wear his ring anymore?" I asked Remy.

"We decided that he didn't need to wear it because we wouldn't have sex until marriage."

I glanced at Nate.

"Don't look at me. I didn't love any of my ex-girlfriends enough."

An uncomfortable silence found its way to the room.

"It's not like you and Shane are broken up, so why are you so gloomy?" Nate asked.

"It's a little hard to be excited when: first, your boyfriend seems to have forgotten it even happened, second, you were drunk so you only remembered the party before and the morning after, and third, you don't see him for two days and then he jets off to Europe for a numerous amount of days. Yeah, it wasn't exactly a situation I was going to brag about."

She embraced me. "I'm so sorry. I didn't realize Shane was such an ass."

"You got that right," I mumbled and wiped away the last of my tears.

Nate spoke up. "But Shane was with us like, the whole time! Except for at the end when—" It struck him even though I already explained it all to Remy. "Oh. He told us he went bowling with you and some other people after the party and casually fell asleep in your hotel room when he came up to your room to get his jacket."

"You believed him?" I asked.

"Not really. But it's not like he was going to tell us."

"Did you guys use protection?" Remy suddenly asked.

I looked down at my twiddling thumbs. I could just imagine them staring at me in disbelief so instead of explaining it all, I got down on the ground and grabbed the shoebox under my bed.

I almost threw it at Remy. "See for yourself."

They both looked a little shocked when the lid came off.

I took a second for them to realize what the little devil plus sign at the end of four of the sticks meant.

"Are you sure these are accurate?" she asked.

"That one says negative," Nate said.

I pointed at the negative-reading one. "That one is the only one that isn't accurate."

"Yeah, does Shane know? I mean, he _is_ the father, right?" Nate asked.

"Yes, he _is_ the father. I've only had sex once. Even if I don't remember how it happened, I remember who it was with."

"Have you talked to Shane about it?" Remy asked.

"No, I don't want to. I'm just—" I sighed. "I don't know. I'm scared."

"I meant about how you two had sex." She made it sound so normal.

"He doesn't even act like we did anything. In fact, he tries to avoid the subject entirely."

"He's such an idiot. I'll talk to him about it," Nate said. "And wait until I give him a piece of my mind."

"Please, don't. Not here, not now. Not ever. He's still my boyfriend, you know. And I love him."

"Sorry."

"It's fine, but it would be nice if you could talk to him. Like best friends, or soul brothers, or band mates, or whatever else you would call your acquaintance."

"Sure. And just because our moms were friends so we grew up together does _not_ make us best friends."

"Are you going to tell him about the baby?" Remy said, changing the subject.

"I'm too scared."

"It's okay to be scared, and you probably want time to just plan things out, but he deserves to know," Nate said.

Remy assured me, "Look, we'll be here for you every step of the way. Whatever you decide, we're there for you. And even if some of us don't agree with what you've decided, we're going to support you and we always will."

"Thanks, guys. Don't tell anyone, please," I requested.

"Of course." Remy gave me one last hug. "But we'll give you space to breathe, okay? Let's go Nate."

"Anything for you, Mitch." Nate hugged me, too.

I returned to what she was doing earlier: nothing. I stared at my ceiling, listened to music, and practically everything else I could think of to keep myself distracted from being reminded of my issue. When I ran out of things to do, I gave up.

"Why did I have to be cursed? I mean it isn't enough for me to have a terrible memory, if I had any, of losing my virginity?" I yelled into nowhere. My parents went out for dinner, and I already ate the leftovers from the day before.

I started up with her constant thinking again.

All I hoped for was that when Shane did find out, he would be there for me and his baby. Even if we decided to give it up for adoption.

My chest _hurt_ just thinking about Shane and all the times he'd hurt me. And now, I'd have to lie to his face every time I talked to him.

Maybe it was time I took a break from always being stressed out with seeing him.

**All righties! Long chapter :) Feedback please!**

**When should Shane find out?**

**Also, later on in this story, I might do a contest like I did in my last story; except, I think I might make the winner a celebrity in this story.**

**:P**


	4. Time

I had to go to school. I just _had_ to. My mom would take me to the doctor if I was "sick" again and then the doctor would run a few tests and reveal some pretty harsh and shocking news to my mother. That wouldn't be good.

I entered the building, holding my breath as if it would take all my morning sickness away. My popularity had sky-rocketed since of course, I was dating Shane Gray. And since I was going out with Shane, I landed on the cover of several magazines posing with him, and all the top designers met with me and started sending in loads of clothes. They sent me the tackiest stuff, but apparently they looked good to everyone else. I had people looking at me to set the trend even though I just wore what was given to me. Then, I became best friends with Nate, who was the homecoming court twice in a row and _the_ guy to be dating, not to mention that Remy was a cheerleader. So, all in all, tons of people, my friends, and everyone else who doesn't fit the description, were going to be paying attention to me. The last thing I wanted to do was look sick.

I ran straight for the bathroom. I splashed some water in my face to wake me up, and when I looked into the mirror, I realized I wasn't wearing any makeup. I personally couldn't care less if I wasn't wearing any, but like I said, people were watching. I reached into my purse, found some mascara and foundation, and applied it quickly before heading over to my locker in attempt not to be late for homeroom.

"So how are you?" Nate asked casually. His locker was only three down from mine.

"I'm good," I replied as the generic answer to all the '_how are you?_' questions I get.

"Really?"

"Not at all."

"Is your—you know—better today? Do you think you'll last?" He was hinting at my morning sickness.

"Yeah. I have to go sooner or later, but I'm good. As long as I get through today, I have hope for tomorrow and-" I tried to convince myself, but I felt something rise in my throat. I ran straight to the bathroom, slid my books against the wall as I made my way to the toilet, and puked out the bagel and three waffles I had earlier. Moments like these made me really miserable. I couldn't keep myself from barfing and my stomach felt like it was going to explode.

I calmed myself and cleaned up after my little misfortunate event and picked my books back up. I found Nate waiting outside the bathroom.

"Are you sure you want to stay here?" he asked.

"What, are you kidding me? We couldn't go anywhere else. I'm stuck here. Plus, I have to turn in a few papers for English Lit and Physics."

"Well those are your second and third period classes. Lunch is at fourth so we'll leave then. I have your birthday gift in mind." He smiled mischievously.

"But my birthday's in a month."

"So? What's the harm in an innocent early birthday gift for the bestest friend in the entire world?" Nate joked. I would laugh if he was _actually_ that corny.

"Um, getting caught for skipping school?" I wasn't one of those goodie-two-shoes—at least I think I wasn't—so I gave in. I couldn't stand to stay in this hellhole anyway. "Fine, just wait for me by my locker right after third."

"Great," he said, walking off in the other direction.

--

I ran straight to my locker as soon as the bell rang. Just like he promised, Nate was leaning against it trying to look cool—it totally didn't work. No matter how famous he was for his rock star status, he was still always going to be my dorky best friend.

"Why are you standing like that?" I asked when I saw him.

"No reason." He blushed furiously and straightened up to move out of the way.

I finished putting my books back and I grabbed a few notebooks so we could get going.

"Come on." He dragged me by the arm out the back doors. We snuck past the woodshop class and hid behind a large garbage dumpster. He held a hand against my shoulder to keep me there, and Nate peered out. He seemed hesitant about where to go next.

I didn't know where we were going, but I knew that he was trying to sneak out of school. I tugged his sleeve and pushed past him.

I pulled him all the way to the back fields where people practiced soccer and ate their lunches on the benches. Then, I swerved behind the trailers and opened the door to the exit from the football field. We passed another few private rooms that I'd never dared to wander into and got to the _way _back of the school where there's nothing but an ancient jungle gym.

"I never knew this was here!" Nate said.

"Come on. You've _never_ skipped a class?" I asked disbelievingly.

"Yeah, but I don't come through _here_!"

"Our school used to be for grades K though twelve. They've never removed the original playgrounds. You of all people should know about this," I explained quickly, pulling him behind a rusty, old trailer and onto the sidewalk.

We paced towards the mall. The mall was right beside our school and it was very convenient since my parents were out of town most of the time anyway so there was no point in going home. We were just about to go in when we stopped behind bushes next to the building. I pulled out my sunglasses and a cap and Nate pulled out his and a beanie. The last time we stepped into a mall alone without disguises, which was only a few weeks ago, we were mobbed by paparazzi which brought along the fans and we spent all our time hiding instead of actually shopping and hanging out. We tried acting nonchalant as we made our way through the front door.

"What's my birthday gift?" I asked once I was sure nobody caught us.

"Here's what I planned: You and I go to any and every clothes store in the mall and I'll pay for it. ALL of it."

"Are you sure?" I asked. "I'd feel bad if you went broke because of me."

"Of course, don't worry about it. I've got money to spare after being paid to stand there for an hour while people took pictures of me for those corny teen magazines."

"But... I can't even wear them for the next seven to eight months so what's the point?"

"It's for afterwards. I mean, people are bound to find out so after it, you can work off the baby weight and wear all those new clothes to wow them. How can you turn off a huge shopping spree in the biggest mall in California? You don't! Now, as your best friend, I'm ordering you to raid those stores and BUY STUFF. I'm tired of seeing you always depressed."

Before I could object, I felt myself being dragged and by the smell of it, we were in Hollister. It was almost pitch black in there with the sunglasses.

I turned around to scold Nate, but instead found a really cute orange tank top.

"Oh! That's really cute," I squealed in a nasally tone as I pointed.

"I'm not a cute-clothes expert, but dude, what's wrong with your voice?"

"I just have a feeling that if I inhale the scent in here anymore than I already did, I'm going to pass out or something else just as bad," I explained, continuing to pinch my nose.

After an amused look from him, I slowly removed my grip and took in a deep whiff of Hollister.

"Okay, maybe it's not so bad." I actually kind of liked the smell. I went up to the rack on the wall. "This is so cute!"

"I agree." He probably didn't and just wanted me to buy stuff.

I made sure Nate thought everything looked good on me before I added it to the collection that he was holding. By thirty minutes, the clothes were stacked all the way up to his chin. I was surprised he could see over it.

"I think... you should go... to try them... on." he said weakly from behind the pile.

"Good idea." We went to the near back and waited in the line of people who were trying to get in a dressing room.

"How many?" the worker guy asked lamely. He looked like he could definitely use a nap…or another job.

"Fifty-seven," I answered.

He turned to look at me and I pointed at Nate. As soon as the worker saw him and the pile of fabric, he escorted us to the largest room. He unlocked the door and let us in the dressing room. There was a small room beside it where people would normally show off their clothes to the person shopping with them. Nate sat in there and awaited my fabulous arrival with the first outfit.

I had on booty shorts and a flowy, blue babydoll shirt with a white tank inside it. I stepped out for Nate's approval. I really didn't see why I needed his approval especially since he was a guy, but he knew what looked good on girls and what didn't. I didn't know how he knew, and honestly, I really didn't want to.

"Nice. I really like the shirt. Shane would love it," he commented.

I rolled my eyes; I was out to have fun, not think about Shane. I didn't want to think about him anymore. He was my boyfriend and yes, I loved him, but that's no excuse as to why he acts like he doesn't care I gave him my virginity. He's becoming more of a burden than a boyfriend.

"Can we please not talk about Shane?"

"Why—" he began but hesitated to finish. He could probably figure it out. "The shirt looks nice. Put that outfit in the 'buy' pile."

It took forever to try on everything. The dressing room was really hot so at the same time, I was wiping away my sweat and trying to go even faster to get out of the room, which made me just sweat more. I bought about fifteen shirts, seven pairs of shorts, three pairs of flip-flops, a tote, and five various pairs of denim. I think the total was around, oh I don't know, 550 bucks? But no one was counting. Only people like Nate had that kind of money to spare on their best friends.

We made our way into Charlotte Russe, Abercrombie & Fitch, Aeropostale, American Eagle, Wet Seal, Forever 21, and the food court. We decided to stop our spree, so we plopped onto a bench and waited for our heart rates to decrease. We had at _least_ 20 bags loaded with clothes.

"Is it just me, or is it _really _hot?" Nate said, almost like he read my mind.

We both took off our headgear and sunglasses and fanned ourselves with real estate brochures that people were handing out at the food court.

By the blink of an eye, kids were literally charging at us and photographers were snapping all sorts of pictures. As the stampede reached us, we had no choice but to—

"RUN!" Nate yelled loudly. He dove for the bags and took off.

I couldn't catch up to Nate since earlier, I could barely stand. I closed my eyes and pushed myself to make my legs move. Out of nowhere, Nate grabbed me by my shirt and pulled me into a store.

He raced toward the dressing room, but we were stopped by a saleswoman.

"Sorry, but you can't go in there if you aren't going to try anything on."

It didn't even take Nate a split second to run to the shelves to grab some clothes. When he ran back, he yanked me past the saleswoman and into the dressing room with him.

I stayed quiet knowing it was best not to make noise and caught my breath.

"Oh God," I said feeling nervous.

"What? They'll go away eventually."

"Uh, no. It's a re-run of this morning at school and right after we came out of A 'n F." I held my stomach in attempt to keep myself from throwing up.

"Stay calm. Deep breaths. IN and OUT," Nate started.

"Hey, look here. I'm not delivering a child! Not yet at least. I need to get to a bathroom before—" I held my breath.

Nate grabbed my purse and found a water bottle. He held it out to me.

I drank furiously. It helped a little, but not by much. I looked at the wall to calm myself down. Then, I saw what Nate was clutching onto.

I spewed the water that was in my mouth 20 different directions. Nate looked disgusted since most of the squirted liquid landed on his face, but then he realized it was only water. He looked at his hand, too, and started cracking up hysterically.

There were two hot pink thongs tangled in his fingers. He was holding onto them like there was no tomorrow.

"What will the media think when they hear that we were stuck in a Victoria's Secret dressing room together?" he mused.

When we couldn't hear too much noise outside, we got up and took deep breaths in case we were wrong and needed to run some more when we got out.

"You still need to puke?" Nate asked.

"No, I'm good."

The best part of what happened was receiving looks from the people around us when we both walked out of the Victoria's Secret dressing room with two thongs.

--

I went back home at the approximate time I would get home usually. Since my parents weren't home, I could just stuff everything into my closet and no one would find out about all the new clothes.

Shane called me twenty times that day and I didn't pick up.

That's when he came to my house unexpectedly.

"What are you doing here?" I asked as I slowly pushed the front door open.

"Do you not want me here or something? I can leave. Unless you're hiding something from me. What are you hiding?" Shane accused.

"What are you talking about?"

"You haven't answered the last hundred calls I made, you usually are always happy to see me, and you're moody. ALL THE TIME. Your period was a week ago so I don't see why you're mad at me."

Well that was embarrassing. First of all, I never noticed he knew when I had my period, second, I didn't even get it this month, and why the heck would he say that to my face?

"I'm not mad at you." I lied the same lie I did two weeks ago. It hurt me so incredibly to just lie like that to his face. It pained me more than he could ever imagine.

"Really? Prove it."

"You really want me to?"

"Yeah, I do."

I sighed.

"What? Show me that you're not mad at me!" Shane said.

"Fine." I took a step towards him. He was definitely surprised when I gripped his shirt and pulled him towards me. I kissed him fiercely to the point where there was lots of tongue involved. "Do you believe me now?"

"Uh, yeah. I do. But there's still something bothering you. I can tell."

"Well there isn't, but if you would like to believe so, then fine." I pushed him back out of the door and slammed it hard. Unfortunately, he stopped it from closing.

"Why are you acting like this?" he screamed at me.

"Why are you being so difficult? Just leave me alone!" I yelled right back.

"You were just kissing me a second ago, and now you're like a completely different person."

"Well maybe it's because you asked me to prove that I'm not mad at you. Last time I checked, I wasn't. But that doesn't change the fact that you're a total and complete idiot."

"WHAT DID I DO?" he roared.

"What didn't you do?"

"I haven't seen you in forever. I got back two weeks ago, and I see you now and then at school, but you're avoiding me. Don't pretend you're not mad at me. I know you are. Is it because I'm always traveling and away from home, isn't it?"

This pushed a button in my system. "You know, I truly wish you were gone more often. That way, I wouldn't always have to bump into you. I wouldn't even have to talk to you. It's not like you'd call anyway, but at least I'd be able to hang out with people I like to be around," I spat, strong sarcasm hinting at my tone.

Shane's face turned sour. It must've stung. That's exactly what I was going for. He sighed. "What happened to us, Mitchie? We were like best friends and we always had a good time together. Now, we never stop bickering and you are still my so-called 'girlfriend' but you don't even want to see me or talk to me when I call. Do you even love me anymore?"

"Don't even say that." I began to rub my temples. I took a few deep breaths and decided to say what I have needed to say for the past few days. "I won't lie when I say I love you, because I truly do. I'm just really confused right now. I have a lot of things going on, and I don't know."

Oh boy. That sounded like it came straight out from a boring chick flick.

"What, has your demo CD been a lot of pressure? Is it school?" I rolled my eyes. He sighed again. "It's not like I'm gonna guess it. You never talk to me anymore."

"I'm not doing a demo CD. I'm not even gonna try to get that contract. I…can't," I replied, hesitating to say the last word.

"What? Why?"

"It's just that I—I—I don't know. Everything is confusing right now." I looked him straight in the eye. "I think I just need some time to think."

"Are you breaking up with me?"

I needed to hold myself together, so I gently pushed the door until it clicked with the doorframe. I didn't know if what I did was the right thing, or if it was just stupid, but I did it anyway.

I rubbed my belly and whispered a gentle 'sorry' to the baby. I could feel it almost crying with me.

**I'm sorry guys, but yes, it happened. Thanks for reading! I'm really busy next week so I won't be posting for awhile. If you want faster updates, REVIEW!**

**I really have no exact direction with this yet, so I'm open to any suggestions. Review:)**


	5. Broken

I rushed to school this morning in hopes of it lasting longer than it should have—I was trying to avoid the appointment Remy suggested I went to. Well, the word _suggested_ took it a little too lightly. It was more like _forced_ or _made mandatory_.

The entire day went by in a blur. I felt like I was being more rushed than usual. I figured that I would have to go to the doctor's sooner or later so I might as well get it over with.

We arrived to the clinic five minutes early for my appointment. In the waiting room, posters of babies, uteri, and breasts hung everywhere. You can almost imagine how comfortable I felt sitting in a room with those images floating around me, especially with Remy and Nate in the room. Poor Nate, he was probably scarred for life.

"Mitchie Torres?" the nurse called after an hour of unsuccessful waiting.

"That's me."

Remy and Nate followed me into a small, cubical room. Everything was blue and pink, and the room itself smelled like baby powder.

"You can use this bathroom. We need a urine sample," the nurse instructed, showing me to the bathroom beside the door.

When I was done with my thing and returned to the square room, the nurse was waiting for me.

"Just sit on here and Dr. Mason will be with you shortly." The nurse patted the brown mattress on top of the cot and left. I got up there with the help of Nate and waited nervously.

Nate was messing around with his iPhone, distracting himself from the even more graphic pictures on the walls. I myself got distracted by the random bucket of free condoms sitting on the counter across from me. That was embarrassing.

"It'll be fine. Ultrasounds don't hurt…or at least I don't think they do." Remy informed me.

"Gee, thanks. That's very reassuring." I sent her a death glare.

Nate looked up. "She isn't getting an ultrasound."

"How would you know?" Remy challenged.

"Because there's no point since ultrasounds are usually used to detect the sex of a baby and you can't do that at least until the second month or maybe even the 16th to 20th week into the pregnancy. Even with the new finger prick thing, you still have to be five weeks into the pregnancy." he said, like it was common knowledge to know all that.

That surprised us.

"What—But—How do you even know that?" I stammered. Remy gave him the same look.

"I get bored really easily and usually my dad's medical magazines are lying around. Plus, I knew all this stuff when my mom was pregnant with my little brother, Frankie." Nate returned to his iPhone and Remy turned back to get a Seventeen magazine out of her tote.

After a few minutes of intense staring at Nate, being amused by the way he bobbed his head when he listened to music, Dr. Mason finally came in.

"Hey, you must be Mitchie." She held out her hand.

I returned the gesture and smiled nervously.

"I looked over the results from the tests and you are indeed pregnant." _Well DUH_, I mentally smacked her in the head. "But you need to raise your vitamin C level. Drink a lot of orange juice and that should do it. Everything else should be fine, but I'll be expecting to see you every two weeks."

"What about morning sickness?" I asked.

"Right, just take some Tylenol or Advil," She said on her way out.

"That's it?" I asked Remy.

"That's it," she confirmed.

--

By the crack of dawn, I was laying on the couch, munching on some chocolate covered pretzels.

I felt my butt start to vibrate and when I realized it was my phone, I picked up.

"Hello?"

"Hey, Mitchie," Nate said, smothering his voice on the other line.

"What's up?"

"I thought you might like to know something before you fainted at school on Monday," he whispered.

"Okay, but why are you whispering?" I asked.

"Well I'm kind of in the car with Frankie…and Shane."

I gulped. Somehow, his name had a spell over me still. It had only been a week, and that was far too short to get over those two years we were together.

"Uh, that's cool, I guess," I said, trying to sound like I didn't care.

"Anyway, Shane's parents are making him go back to high school."

"That's great for him. He'll just suffer like the rest of us have been suffering for the past three years. Big whoop."

"I meant, Shane's parents are making him come to _Northlake_," he said subtly.

My heart sank. I spent my whole week avoiding the crossing of paths with him, hearing his voice, seeing his face. The _entire_ week: seven days, 168 hours, 10,080 minutes, 604,800 seconds. And now, it all just washed away like the tidal wave that swept away the carvings of our names in the sand last summer.

"Sorry about the news, but I have to go. Bye!" he whispered and then hung up.

I kept the phone lingering there. I couldn't tell my brain to put my phone away. I couldn't feel anything emotionally or physically. Everything just went numb.

--

I spent Saturday with Nick and Sunday went by slowly since I spent a big portion of my day sulking about Shane and how I was going to face him at school the next day. That day is today.

I walked through the narrow hallways alerted, making sure to avoid the contact with Shane. I caught a few glimpses of him being hit on by two extremely fake girls. I remembered them from fifth grade and judging by the appearance of their roots, their hair was definitely not naturally platinum blonde.

I shuffled to my class avoiding the awkward glances from my friends. Somehow they were called my friends, yet they told the school everything they heard. One of those friends included Allie, the gossip queen of our school.

"So, why aren't you talking to Shane?" she pressed when she glided to my side.

I had to be careful about what I said around her. If you told her your mom was having foot surgery, the story could be altered to the point where people would start sending flowers and cards that said "I'm so sorry about your cat."

"I'm not, not talking to him. I just haven't seen him all day. I've been really busy."

"Oh come on. No need to lie to me. I know there's something wrong," Allie pushed for the latest dish.

"Look, we're not together anymore." I said without thinking. I didn't care too much about telling her that. Magazines and newspaper articles had already suggested that we ended our relationship. Who cares if I just confirmed it?

"What happened?"

"It just didn't work out," I excused myself like the way celebrities would answer.

"What did you do?" she immediately accused me.

"What do you mean, what did _I_ do? You're kidding, right?" I said, shoving some books in my locker and pulling out the folders I needed for my next two classes.

"Fine, what did _he_ do?" she asked again.

"What didn't he do? Look, I'd love to chat it up with you,"—I totally just lied straight to her face—"but I have to go turn this paper in." I waved my report on Afghanistan at her face and walked off.

In AP History, people kept staring at me and whispering things to each other. It made me really uncomfortable, but then again gossip spread like wildfire.

I was heading for the cafeteria keeping my guard up for any suspicious crowds that might look like Shane was a part of. I accidentally dropped a notebook and for that split second I reached down to grab it. When I stood up straight again, a familiar guy I was particularly trying not to see pushed past me. I along with some of my books fell.

All the memories along with everything else I had in racked in my brain that was shoved somewhere deep in the jungle of my closet came flooding back to me. Every time I'd looked away from the right side of the screen to avoid one of those annoying ads with his face that read 'His IQ is 120. Are you smarter than Shane Gray?', every time I changed the radio station when the DJ announced a Connect Three song, every time I skipped the 'S' section of the address book in my phone all went to nothing in that one moment. I remembered those wintery nights when we sat outside, cuddling to share body heat. I remembered the sweet texts he would send me throughout the day when I was at school, to entertain me a little during class. I remembered those summer days we spent at the beach with Remy and that picture that was sitting somewhere in a box of unwanted reminiscence. What I didn't remember was why I missed him—or at least I tried not to.

"Sorry," he muttered and bent down to pick up my books. He offered me a hand but I rolled my eyes and turned away, hoping he didn't catch the tear that was streaking down my face. "Fine, I guess. Here."

He handed me my books and was about to head toward the cafeteria again when he muttered another quick 'sorry' and shuffled off.

At lunch, I took my usual seat by Nate since Remy had her lunch during fifth period. I figured Shane would also, but I was proven wrong.

I couldn't keep my eyes off him as much as I would've liked to. He was cracking jokes, making people laugh, and acting like nothing was wrong. For that moment when we collided, I thought he looked a bit sad. Shouldn't he be suffering heartbreak as much as I was? Then again, I was pregnant with his child and he didn't know. While that ripped my heart in two, I lost my appetite.

"Are you just going to ignore him altogether?" Nate asked when I snapped back into reality. I wasn't in the mood to talk about it, though.

"Um, I think I'm going to uh, go to the um, the soda machine outside to get a drink." I stood up and picked up my tray. I was still hungry, even with no appetite.

"So you're going to ignore me, too?" he called when I walked out the double doors. He eventually got up and followed me, but headed a different way when I reached the corridor that intersected four other hallways.

I somehow ended up in the janitor's closet, in the darkness, eating my barf worthy cafeteria food. My morning sickness was slowly fading away, so I didn't puke in the sight of it.

Then, a knock on the door shook me. Mr. Garbowski, the custodian, wouldn't mind if I was in here…I hope. I slowly pushed it open to Nate.

"Mind if I join you?" he asked as he was already settling himself into the small room and closing door.

"I guess there's no other choice but to talk about it. With you. In here," I mumbled.

"Then talk; I'm here and I'm not leaving until you talk about it thoroughly. I'm your best friend, and all you've told me is what happened. You've been beating yourself up for about a week now. I think I deserve some kind of venting from you."

"Well maybe you can make a list of things you deserve and get back to me when you've decided everything you need from me," I replied harshly.

"I was trying to help, but if you're gonna be this way then—"

"Sorry," I said quickly. "I'm pregnant and hormonal. Forgive me."

"Fine. But I'm okay, stop worrying about me."

"You're kidding, right? I've been your best friend for a long time and you are _still_ able to say that? I know you better than anyone. I know for a fact that you have a lot to say, but you're just afraid to say it."

"What about Remy? She's my best friend, too, you know." I questioned.

"You've only been friends with her since ninth grade. You guys are close, but she doesn't know you as well as I do." Nate stated confidently. "So to save you the trouble of arguing back, let's just start over: What are you going to do?"

I sighed and left a long, melodramatic pause. "I don't know what to do. I'm really confused. I mean, he's the one who acts like nothing is wrong and then I go along with it even though I'm dying inside and yet, _I'm _the one who's at fault? He's so stubborn and irritating and heartbreaking and—"

"We both know that the list never ends. But look, you still love him, right?"

"I don't really know anymore, honestly."

"Then why don't you just communicate with him?" he suggested like it was the easiest thing in the world to do.

"We _did_ communicate."

"Barely. You're so used to cutting him off when he's about to say something important, that you never really hear him out."

I sent him the death glare. Rule number 1: _Never_ make a pregnant girl angry.

"Sorry. How do you feel about him truthfully? Not in anger nor in hatred," he asked.

I had to think about it. Just the thoughts make tears well up in my eyes. "It hurts…to love him." I finally admitted out in the open. "He's so right for me, but—I don't know."

"You definitely deserve better, but Shane's a good person at heart. He has bad sides, but everyone does, don't they?" He reached over to my face and wiped away a tear.

"I guess."

"Maybe you need to decide if Shane is worth all this. If you still love him enough, I'm sure he is."

"You always know what to say." I forced out a half smile. "Any girl would be lucky to have you."

We shared a warm look. I couldn't break the gaze, and I didn't want to. I had no idea what was running through my head at that moment. In a flash, his warms lips met mine.

**Sorry that they're not back together yet. And sorry this took too long. When I'm not doing schoolwork, I'm usually catching up on sleep or actually **_**in**_** school. So hopefully when everything dies down a little bit, I can post more often ;) Also, I'll probably do another contest when I get posting more often. I know people hate it when they have to wait longer than necessary for the results. Thanks for reading. :)**


	6. Renewed

**I really don't deserve your sympathy after not posting for like, a bajillion years, but I'm really sorry because I'm barely passing all my classes and the grades I'm making affect the rest of my life. So for the icing on the cake, I'm **_**promise**_** the later chapters will be **_**much**_** longer.**

I won't lie; I enjoyed it. Nate was a good kisser. As realization hit, I quickly pulled back.

"What was that?" I asked, not necessarily scolding him. "This can't be happening." I wiped away a few of my previous tears.

"Sorry. It just seemed like the time to—sorry. It was just stupid. I don't know what I was thinking. The whole thing between you and Shane is complex enough and I just—"

I cut him off. "Stop that. It's okay, really. Let's just keep this incident to ourselves, all right?"

"Agreed," he answered.

The dark room grew quiet as we leaned against the wall. We've known each other long enough to have silences without everything becoming awkward, even though we shared quite an interesting moment.

Finally, Nate broke the silence. "We have to get back to class, you know. Try to stop thinking about Shane. He's not the most important thing in the world."

Right after I thought I was done with crying, another salty tear flew down my face. "That's a little hard when the human being growing inside me if half of him. Stupid, _stupid_ baby."

"Hey, look at me," he said. When I made no movement, he lifted my chin up and forced me to look at him. "The baby isn't stupid. _Your_ baby isn't stupid. Just an unplanned miracle. Now come on, we really have to get going." He stood up and held his hand out for me. I took it gladly, knowing that I had such an amazing best friend.

I held on to his encouraging words; _unplanned miracle_, I whispered to myself. I thought I could go through the rest of the day without seeing his face, but I was wrong. I had to fight the urge to play hooky again.

For the next few weeks, I suffered just as much—if not more—as the first day that Shane showed up at my school. It didn't hurt to see his face. What stung was the fact that he acted like he didn't care about me anymore, kind of like the way he acted like that night never happened.

I had Health II for the semester so while the teacher was preaching to us about staying abstinent and how bad teenage pregnancy can turn out, I couldn't help just to sulk even more. Then, there was that reviving food unit we had that taught us about nutrition and proper nourishment. I tried eating a little healthier for the baby but also for myself. In one of the oh-so-boring videos that are shown to us, it said that eating nutritiously could make us feel better about ourselves. At this point, I was _desperate_.

But today, I was going to walk into Northlake High and give Shane a piece of my mind. I didn't plan to yell at him or anything. I'd suffered far more than he did and he deserved to know what going through my mind. I hadn't prepared what to say or how to say it, and I didn't know why I suddenly chose today to do it. It was probably triggered by how irritable my parents were acting last night, but either way, I needed to say this to him and nothing was going to stop me.

I stormed up to his locker when he was emptying out his backpack.

The moment he turned around and looked me in the eye, I stopped breathing. The furious tone that I was planning to use melted away, and I practically had to cough up what I'd been thinking about saying.

His eyes were saying _sorry_, but somehow I knew that wasn't all he was thinking.

"What, did you just forget about me?" I asked in a surprisingly soft voice.

"What are you talking about?"

"You walk these hallways like nothing ever happened. Is that what I mean to you? _Nothing_?" I said, not raising my voice even in the slightest. I didn't want to come and yell at him. I wanted answers, and I wasn't leaving until I got them.

"How could you even think that?"

"You haven't exactly been showing any signs of sadness or depression. You haven't said 'hi' to me when you see me. You haven't even attempted to contact me to straighten things out."

"You're kidding, right? You're blaming all this on _me_? What about _you_? You're the one who acts like the world is over when _you're_ the one who dumped _me_. You've never given me a chance to talk because every time I do see you, you're off in Candyland pretending I'm not there. So if you came today to tell me that I haven't tried hard enough, remember to take a look in the mirror and remember _exactly_ how many times I've had the opportunity. That's right: _zero_."

I probably deserved that.

"Good thing I'm not here to tell you that," I said sarcastically, biting my tongue to keep myself from saying what I needed to say the most.

"Then why are you here?"

"Because I've been _hurting_, Shane! I pretend I don't see you because I'm too afraid that _you_ don't want to see me. I'm in the state of what you call being "heartbroken", and seeing you walk around like you don't even remember I'm alive doesn't help much. I just need some kind of closure. I don't think I could take this pain anymore, ever again."

A solo tear rolled down my cheek and plopped onto the ground. I couldn't believe I just told him all that in one breath.

Before I could turn around and walk away, I was smothered by a familiar cologne scent. Shane held me tight and gently kissed my forehead.

"I'm so sorry. For everything," he murmured in my ear. "I care so much about you; you don't even know. If it helps, I'm hurting, too. Seeing you like this makes it that much worse and… I miss you. A lot."

I stepped back a little. "I miss you, too. I needed to hear that, but I don't know if I can do this again, if I'm ready to."

"Oh. Okay, I guess." He hesitated to say something else, but then stopped, looking discouragingly at me.

"What?" I asked.

"I know you don't want to get back together, but I won't lie; I can't _stand_ being away from you."

"We can still be friends, you know."

"Really? You'd like that?"

"Of course," I answered confidently. I myself wasn't ready to throw myself back in a relationship, but friendship is acceptable.

"I needed someone to go to the premiere of this movie that featured our music with. I'll pick you up at eight so we can start our friendship, if that's okay with you," he suggested.

"Sounds great," I answered, still wondering how a conversation that was supposed to end in anger turned out so great.

I pulled out the tightest pair of skinny jeans I owned and leveled it out with a baby doll shirt that gently flowed over my stomach to level it out.

He arrived promptly in his casual clothes. Knowing his record label, they probably sent someone over to dress him "appropriately", meaning he had to look slick. I wasn't measuring myself every day, so I wasn't too sure if I was beginning to show, even if I was still at about two months pregnant.

I opened the door and greeted him like I would've greeted any one of my good friends, except for the fact that he was so incredibly attractive.

"You ready?" he asked.

"Yeah, let me just grab my stuff."

I ran to the kitchen to get my purse and went back to where he was standing. He took a good look at me up and down. As he looked at _me_ again and not my body, all I could do was pray that he didn't notice change.

"You look—"

_Please don't say bigger, _I thought.

"—like you're glowing," he finished. "I'm serious, you look really pretty tonight."

I blushed a little before looking back at him. "Thanks. You don't look too bad yourself."

He grinned and held the door open for me.

We arrived at the premiere and before we even stepped out of the car, a mob of eager paparazzi was taking pictures through the windshield and practically pouncing on the car. I shielded my eyes from the bright flashes. As Shane was parking, two security guards knocked on the window and shooed the cameramen away. He escorted us onto the red carpet.

I felt oddly out of place. Usually I was comfortable with Shane, being able to kiss and hold him all I wanted. But now, it was kind of weird. I almost felt like I was going as an individual than as Shane's friend.

He almost read my mind as he laced his fingers through mine.

"Friends can still hold hands, right?" he whispered through my hair.

"Sure," I murmured back.

We were about to enter the building as a big group of reporters stopped us. A woman shoved a couple of microphones at us and started asking us questions.

"Mitchie, why did you turn down the record deal offer?"

"Mitchie, do you want still want to be a singer?"

"Mitchie, are you going to continue making a CD solo?"

I was surprised that most of the questions were directed at me instead of Shane who was standing right beside me. Then again, I hadn't shown my face at many paparazzi-infested events for awhile.

"Uh," I looked over at Shane and he nodded for me to continue, "I'm kind of taking a break from everything. I still love music and one day I might release an album, but for now, I'm just going to relax and enjoy being a teen."

They started asking more questions but we were ushered into the room by another security guard.

The movie hadn't started yet, so we sat around and did nothing.

A man in his 30s who I'd never seen before came up to me.

"So I heard you turned down the record deal," he said.

"Yeah. I don't mean to be rude, but who are you again?" I asked as politely as I could.

"I'm Jeff Reagan, _president_ of the record label who was trying to sign you."

My heart jumped a little. "Oh. Thank you so very much for your kindness and effort into giving me a deal. I just don't feel ready for such a big leap in the music industry."

"I came over to talk to you about that. We realized that you deserved way more than we offered. If you agree to record a few tracks for us, we will pay you twice as much as previously, before it even sells. We don't even require a demo anymore for you. We have so much confidence in you that we're giving you two months for the songs, and you can even write a few if you wanted."

"I don't know…" I said slowly.

"This is a big offer. Here's my card. Give me a call with an answer before Thursday. I'll be waiting." He handed me a blue business card and walked away.

'_Whoa_' was all Shane had to say.

"I don't know if I'm ready for something of that nature."

"I don't want to pressure you into anything, but that's like _triple_ what they initially offered me. This is your shot."

"I'll have to think about it."

I was already leaning toward 'yes'. In two months, I'll be about four months pregnant. If I reeled in a lot of money for the baby now, I wouldn't have to be a workaholic mother when it comes.

"I know it's been only like two weeks since we split and only a few hours since we decided to remain friends, but it's really killing me inside not to be able to kiss you. What do you say? Do you want to give this another shot?" I heard Shane say.

The lights dimmed and I pretended like I didn't hear him.

"Shh, the movie's starting," I whispered.

**I want to like bow down to you and insanely apologize for not posting. I swear this is the longest period of not posting from now on. Summer is almost here and with school out, I can write a lot more!**


	7. Confrontation

**I know I honestly don't deserve any reviews for the last chapter, but thank you SO MUCH for those who did.**

_I hadn't spoken since he asked if I wanted to get back together. I honestly wasn't sure what my answer would be. He tore my heart to pieces, and now he's just asking to piece it back together?_

_It was dead silent on the drive back home._

_He came to a stop right outside my house and looked at me. "So what'd you think of the—"_

"_I miss you, too," I blurted out. I really did. Whether I was pregnant with his baby or not, I still wanted to be with him._

"_What?"_

"_I heard you before the movie started. Yes; I want to give it another shot," I said, looking away, afraid that he might've changed his mind._

"_Really?"_

"_Of course. Can we start over?"_

"_Anything to make you happy."_

_He kissed me goodnight like he had so many times before and drove off, leaving me wanting more. I loved that feeling._

It had been a mere two days since all of that, and I was already looking back at it like it happened years ago.

I opened the door when Shane came knocking.

"Hey," he said, leaning in to kiss me.

I kissed back and unwillingly pulled away. "I have to finish some homework."

He followed me upstairs to my room.

"Where are your parents?" he asked when he saw the half eaten microwave pizza.

"I'm really not sure, but they said they'd be home by eleven so we're safe." It was really irritating to have parents who try to pry into every detail of your life.

I sat at my desk and started diagramming Shakespeare's sonnets when Shane started looking around in my room.

"Where's all my stuff?" he was wondering.

Sure enough, I opened the closet door and beside all the clothes Nate had bought me, which I still haven't worn, were Shane's stereo, clothes, CDs, and everything else he'd left in my house from before.

"I wasn't particularly fond of being reminded of you each time I stepped into my room before, but you can take it all out if you want," I explained.

"Sure," he replied, starting to lug all his electronics equipment out.

"Sorry about the clothes. I haven't had the time to sort them all away yet."

"I thought you were going to save up for that Fendi purse," he said, stepping over a few bags at a time.

"I didn't pay for it," I simply answered.

"Then who did?"

"…Nate," I mumbled. I didn't want Shane to get the wrong idea. Then again, we did share a kiss in a closet.

I looked at him to check for signs of anger. He wasn't really good at showing his emotions, so I sort of got it when he suddenly became silent.

"It was my early birthday present. We skipped class awhile ago."

"Is there something going on between you two that I should know about?" he questioned.

"Not really." I wasn't in the mood to lie even though Nate and I promised each other we wouldn't say anything. "Well, the other day I was eating lunch in the janitor's closet and Nate tried to cheer me up, and somehow we kissed."

"_What_?!"

"Look, we weren't exactly together or anything. I don't see what the problem is."

He opened his mouth to say something, but then stopped himself and looked away.

"Remember how we said we were starting over? Let's just leave the past behind us, okay?" I said, trying to convince him to let it go.

Shane let out a breath. "Fine. But why were you eating lunch in the janitor's closet?"

"Promise you won't go insane?"

"Pinky swear," he said.

"Well, you were kind of acting completely normal in the cafeteria right after we decided to take a break from our relationship, and it seemed to me that I meant nothing to you."

He embraced me right there and whispered, "You know that's not true. I'm terrible at showing my emotions, and you know that. I'm sorry."

"It's okay."

Shane went to go lie on my bed. He looked quite comfortable, so after about five seconds of envy, I joined him.

He turned over and started kissing me. Before I knew it, he took his shirt off, completely forgetting about his purity ring, even if it was already supposed to be off in the first place. My shirt was gradually rising.

I pushed him away and pulled my shirt back down.

"What's the matter?" he asked.

"I just… I can't, sorry." I grabbed his shirt from the floor and tossed it back to him.

"Are you worried about our purity rings?" Shane asked, as if it meant nothing already.

I scoffed. I got up from where I was and stomped over to my pink drawers. I pulled out a little white box with purity ring in it.

"What do you mean; am I worried about our purity rings? If you haven't noticed, I haven't been wearing one! DID YOU COMPLETELY FORGET THAT WE HAD SEX IN A HOTEL ROOM IN LOS ANGELES?! You talk like nothing ever happened. Just because we were drunk doesn't mean we didn't do it! BECAUSE WE DID! Afterward, you ignored me and then jetted off to Europe. Do you get why I've been mad, now? You've caused me so much pain and hurt, and I'm tired of making up excuses for you as to why you act like you don't remember how I gave you my virginity. You act like it means NOTHING to you!" I screamed in one breath. I threw my ring at him. "Here, keep it!" I was so frustrated that I didn't have room for tears. "I lied, okay? I _was_ mad at you. I still am."

It hit him like a bomb. He just stared at me for awhile, comprehending everything I had just said to him. I looked at him closely. Slowly, a salty, wet tear trickled down his right cheek.

He sat there, a blank expression spreading like wildfire across his face and darted his eyes away from me. He snatched my purity ring that was thrown on his lap and squeezed it tightly.

"Say something!" I demanded. Shane slowly turned back and looked at me.

"Are you serious?" he replied, his voice slowly cracking. He inhaled deeply and let it out in a breath. "You think I don't care? What about you? You've been avoiding talking about it _just_ as much."

"Only because you've been an ass about it!" I yelled.

Shane winced at my tone since I rarely ever yelled and replied in the same voice. "I haven't said anything about it! I was in _Europe_. I wasn't even on the same continent."

"That's exactly my point. Where's the guy I fell in love with? Where's the guy who never ran away from his problems and was always there for his girlfriend?"

He sighed. "I don't know. He changed, I guess. I really hate it when we fight."

"What? That's it? I'm trying to explain to you why I'm so mad and that's your clincher?" I asked in disbelief. Shane looked up as I continued. "Just get out of my house, I can't think with you here."

He didn't budge.

"Fine, if you won't leave, I will." I slammed the door on my way out and slipped on some torn up Vans. I ran outside.

I didn't know where I was going, being lost in my frustration at life. I didn't really care, either. As long as it was away from where Shane was, I would survive.

I could hear the loud chirping of the crickets anticipating the night and feel the rough ground beneath my soles. I trampled on the pinecones playing dead on the street, and stepped over many shards of glass from beer bottles. The cars driving past me honked loudly, awakening me from my deep intellectual thoughts on why life dealt me such a bad hand. There was no such thing as not thinking where I was. I either noticed all the fine details of the world, or I thought about my problems.

Subconsciously, I was heading for Nate's.

I had to literally make my legs move toward his front door. I was beginning to feel guilty about all the times he'd helped me and yet, I don't remember any times when I returned the favor. I forced myself to press his doorbell, praying that I wouldn't wake up his mom. But before I could, I heard a hinge creak and I looked up to see what it was.

"What's wrong?" he whisper-yelled from his window.

"I need someone to talk to. Shane and I talked. Well mostly yelled, but quite a few things were said." I admitted shyly.

"You told him?!"

"No, not about that. Just about what we did to cause that problem." I matched his whispered tone. I expected him to understand what I meant, but that didn't go too well.

"What?"

"Never mind! Just let me in somehow!"

A few seconds later, Nate rushed out from his backyard. "Are you okay?" he asked, holding me in a hug. This time, the tears just started flowing on their own.

"Not really," I mumbled, easing my breathing.

Nate continued holding me. "Come on, let's go inside." He pulled me by my elbow and tip-toed through the vast screen doors of his house. Luckily, his room was on the main floor, where we were.

He turned on a dim light in his poster-covered room and joined me on the bed.

"So are you going to tell me what happened?" he asked after a few minutes of silence.

"Basically, Shane and I were making out and the next thing you know, our shirts are coming off. Then, I realized what I was doing so I stopped and he asked me if I was worried about our purity rings. I mean seriously, he didn't even realize that mine wasn't on? He shouldn't even be wearing his! So I finally told him why I was acting bi-polar these last few days and now, he either left my house, or he's destroying my stuff in anger. There was a lot of screaming and yelling involved."

"Shane can be a jerk sometimes."

"Tell me about it," I scoffed. "Oh, and…uh…"

"What?"

"I told him about the closet incident."

He walked over to his drawers and started pulling out blankets and pillows. "Well, he was bound to find out anyway. And it didn't mean anything of significance so whatever."

"You're not mad?"

"How could I be mad? He's done enough damage for one day." Nate started spreading out the covers over his hardwood floor.

"What are you going to do?" Nate asked.

"I really don't know. It's just so irritating. Everything in my life is going wrong. Well, with the exception of you and Remy."

"I'm sorry. You can spend the night here," he said, patting the pillows down. "Tomorrow's Saturday and my parents won't mind, nor will they even notice."

"Thanks, you're the best. I kind of feel bad. You're always there for me, being my rock, and I can't even remember one time that I've been there for you," I gazed at him.

He gazed back. "Don't worry about it. You've been there for me even when you don't notice it, like the time my parents had a huge fight and my dad didn't come home for a week or other time when Alice decided to dump me." He yawned. "Let's go to bed. I'm pretty exhausted."

We shared a chuckle. He unraveled his folded up sheets and climbed in.

"You really don't have to. I'll sleep on the floor." I offered, with more guilt setting in.

"Seriously, Mitch. You're carrying my nephew in there." Nate pointed at my stomach. "I am not about to let you strain your back by sleeping on the floor when I am perfectly fine with it since Frankie comes in here all the time when thunder scares him or he has nightmares. This is going to be our sleeping arrangement whether you like it or not."

"I don't get any say in this whatsoever?" I asked.

"Nope, none," he answered, settling deep into his blanket.

The next morning, I awoke to the plopping of pebbles against Nate's window. He was already getting up to check it out.

"_Now_ you come and apologize?" Nate called out the window. "Dude, I thought you finally changed yourself for the better. I thought you stopped becoming a jerk. I had faith in you, man." He pulled the window back and latched it in.

"What did he want?" I mumbled, still half-asleep.

"Don't worry, go back to sleep," he whispered back.

After fifteen minutes, I couldn't keep my mind off Shane nor could I go back to sleep so I got up and went to the bathroom that was conveniently connected to Nate's room. I freshened up and told myself it was a brand new day.

"Hey, where is your family?" I asked Nate as I went downstairs for breakfast when I noticed his house was unusually empty.

"Frankie had an early soccer practice and my parents usually go out for brunch with friends on Saturdays."

"Really? You never told me that."

"They only started a few weeks ago." He smiled a crooked smile as he divided the scrambled eggs onto two plates from the pan. He slid the blue plate across the islander to me.

"Thanks," I said as I dug in. "It's really good."

"Yeah it is." He laughed.

We finished up really quickly and before I knew it, we were beginning a Guitar Hero III marathon. We used to always have them back before our lives got incredibly crazy. Everything got hectic when Shane and I gave up on keeping our relationship a secret and revealed it to the world. Before that, people knew me as Connect Three's companion. I was always seen as Nate's best friend. But since then, a lot of things have changed.

"I missed this," I commented when he was choosing a song.

"Miss what?"

"_This_," I gestured to the space around us. "Sleeping over and pigging out on Friday nights, staying up really late to watch random movies, playing Guitar Hero all day on Saturdays; we used to always do this."

Nate looked up at me. "Me too." His face seemed curious. "Why did we stop?"

"I don't know. I guess things got a little out of control with the media always trying to get into our business."

"Well we're going to start again, right?" The composure of his smile seemed hopeful.

"Of course."

Nate finished playing Through the Fire and Flames on expert. "I got 97 percent! Woot!" he called and high-fived me.

--

The grass was still glimmering in the sunlight from the morning dew on Monday morning. I yawned just thinking about the morning. I had woken up at five this morning so any trace of energy in me was gone. I treaded to the side of building four, where all the health and gym classes were held. On the first day of school, everything was getting on my nerves, so I wandered around campus and found this perfectly green patch of grass that I constantly went to whenever I needed to think. The cameras couldn't get a view of the back of building four so I was safe from being suspended for skipping class.

Instead of peace and mind, I found Shane sitting there, eating his sandwich.

"What are _you_ doing here?" I asked, sounding disgusted.

"I was actually thinking, but it's won't be so nice now that you're here, will it? Don't even bother saying anything; I'll leave," he grunted and got up.

"No, don't go," I whispered. I immediately regretted it when Shane turned around and waited for me to say something. "I'm—sorry," I started, and then heard was I was saying. "Wait, why am _I_ apologizing? If anyone, you should."

He stared at the ground. "I'm gonna go." He turned around, getting ready to go.

I let out a big breath and slid against the brick wall until I was sitting on my butt. As I thought he was gone, a big shadow cast over me.

I looked up to see Shane towering above me.

"Sorry for being retarded. I should've treated you better. The past is the past and it happened, so I'm sorry about pretending it didn't. I didn't know how to handle it, so I just ignored it completely. It was really childish. I hope you can forgive me. I love you."

"I love you, too, Shane," I replied. I think I was finally ready to let go and put all my faith in him this time when he apologized.

I stood up to kiss him.

"I have good news," he said, pulling back.

"What is it?"

"We don't have to stay here today," he said, smiling mischievously.

"What do you mean?"

"Did you make a decision about the record deal?"

I looked into his eyes. "Yeah, I did actually. This is what I want. I'm going to accept."

"Then, we have studio time today and they're letting us get tutored instead of attending. I already talked to Jeff and he said to just show up today if you want to. Remy can come, too."

"Awesome," I replied.

As we were walking to the front office, I called my mom to let her know everything and although I was expecting her to lecture me about not including her in big decisions like so, she seemed surprisingly calm and excited for me. We got a hold of a few notes scribbled out by the studio managers and somehow, Remy, Nate, Jason, and even Jake tagged along. Mason, my younger brother who's a freshman, chose to stay at school because he had a few tests.

At the studio, T-Time, our producer, Larry, wanted Shane and I to have a duet. He asked me for suggestions on lyrics, and I pulled out my song book. It had every song I'd ever written in it.

"This is some really good stuff. We can use a lot of it," he commented as he flipped through the pages.

He sat us down when everyone else went to go scavenger for donuts and chose a song for us to try out.

He happened to choose my song "_This is Me_", and mixed it with Connect Three's song "_Gotta Find You_".

I struck a few chords on the guitar and then played a tune on the piano for Larry so he got an idea what it was supposed to sound like.

When Shane and I were in the booth starting the song, something struck inside.

No matter how much I wished otherwise, our lives were never going to be normal. If I was going to follow this dream of mine, we would always have people paying attention to our lives and even without them, soon enough we'd be _parents_ to another human being.

**See? I worked extra hard to get this one out:) I'm working extra hard again for the next chapter.**

**Anyway, I'm having another contest. ENTER TO BE AN ORIGINAL CHARACTER IN THIS STORY!**

**ELIGIBILITY: You must have an FF account, or email.**

**HOW TO ENTER: Just review (or PM) with your name and age and include a few interesting facts about yourself (hobbies, favorite color, ethnicity, favorite ice cream flavor, etc. ANYTHING, really!) I'll contact you if you win.**

**ALL CONTESTANTS: Your account name **_**will**_** be posted on my profile. Be sure to check back often to make sure you are entered.**

**DEADLINE: June 10, 2009. I'm giving you guys a month to get your entries in.**


	8. Exchange

**Whoo! Keep entering people:) I kind of forgot to mention that this isn't exactly an audition-type contest. I'm literally putting names into a hat and drawing them. So again, if you've entered, go check out my profile to see if your username is on there. If it isn't, don't hesitate to let me know! I'm kind of bad at keeping track of things so that would actually help me out a lot. Oh, and when I said "random facts" and listed examples like favorite ice cream flavor, I didn't think people would actually list their favorite ice cream flavor xD Haha, it was cool, though. On with the story!**

It was our fourth day in studio and so far, things weren't going too bad. We letting our voices take a break so we were sitting in the lounge, with chocolate bars and donuts lying around everywhere.

"How could you eat that?" I asked Shane, almost puking at the sight of his ultra-glazed donut. In case I forgot to mention, my morning sickness was definitely kicking in these days.

He looked at me with a straight, but oh-so-funny face. "Do not insult King Isaac."

"You named your donut _King Isaac_?" I repeated, internally laughing at how ridiculous he was being.

"He's my friend."

"You're so weird. I wonder about you sometimes," I joked.

He playfully looked offended as he took another bite.

"You know I love you," I offered. I was trying my best not to concentrate on the donut.

He leaned down to kiss me. My heart melted at the touch of his lips.

I was disappointed when he didn't say it back right away, but I knew he felt it. Shane grabbed my hand and walked me to my booth in silence. He stopped right outside the door.

"I love you, too," he whispered in my ear. I could hear his smile. "Meet me in the back lot for lunch break. We have to do our separate recording right now, so I'll see you later."

He gave me another peck and headed down the hallway. Butterflies churned in my stomach, anticipating the arrival of lunchtime. I stood there for a few minutes, thinking how this was too good to be true—but then having my hopes crushed because it _was _too good. This was gonna end sometime. Especially when he finds out about the baby.

I glanced at my phone really quick, and after realizing I was five minutes late, I crept into Studio F—what Larry said would be my home for the next two months.

I picked up a water bottle from the corner and set it beside the microphone. I wasn't feeling too great at that particular moment, so I took a few breaths until Larry started laying down the law; this was my first time recording alone. Everything else I've done was with Shane by my side, guiding me, but apparently Larry was harsher when you worked with him by yourself.

"Rule number one: You will _listen_ to what I say and take my critiques into consideration always. Number two: There is always room for improvements. And rule number three: Never will you be late again. A minute after is a minute too late. You understand?"

"Yes, sir," I mumbled nervously, automatically feeling inferior to his authority.

My throat was feeling pretty dry and uncooperative so my warm-up scale was rather scratchy. Larry turned on the sign that read _'Recording In…'_ and then had a five-second countdown.

The first words were _they don't understand_. Let's just say they sounded way better in my head than how I belched them out. He didn't stop the recording so I kept singing, grasping onto the little hope I had that he didn't think it was as bad as it actually was.

"What the hell was that?" Larry roared when it was over.

"Sorry, my throat became a little dry," I explained with a smile, expecting him to lighten up just a little.

"Is that it? It sounded like you ate a breathing frog for breakfast. Work harder."

He pressed the same countdown button, and I sang it again. The second time around went much better. I thought it would be good enough to satisfy his expectations, but apparently he wanted higher quality.

"Is that all you've got? I don't know what Jeff ever saw in you. If you want to survive this business you have to have more talent than that," he spat through the speakers since he was sitting on the opposite side of the glass window.

I tried ignoring his snide comments and at about the eighth time recording it, it got old. I'd pay attention when he was actually giving me tips like _'Support your diaphragm when you hit the high notes' _or _'Sing this song to the meanest, nastiest person you can imagine. Like they were your ex.'_ For the latter suggestion, I kind of just imagined him, but when I tried imagining him as my ex-boyfriend, my morning sickness urges started going again. Instead I imagined myself punching him in the face and surprisingly, I sang with more passion for hatred than ever possible.

After the rough recording with Larry just tearing my confidence up at my heel, he finally released me to go eat lunch. I raced out of there toward the back parking lot like there was no tomorrow.

I crashed into Nate on the way to the doors leading outside.

"Why are you in such a hurry?" Nate asked, hinting a little implication in his voice. He grinned brightly.

"Stop tormenting me. I want to know what he's up to!"

I didn't bother pressing it out of Nate because first, he usually keeps his lips sealed and there's no getting around it, and second, by the time he opens his mouth, Shane could already be telling me himself.

I was gasping for air outside, looking everywhere for signs of Shane, but then decided to sit down next to the building's wall.

"Glad you came," he said awkwardly then chuckled as he stepped out from the door across from where I came out.

I sat up so I could lean against the cool brick, patting down my hair like nothing happened.

"So what's up?" I asked as casually as possible.

"Well, here." He joined me on the ground and reached around in the pocket of his jacket, searching. He eventually found it and held it in his left hand. He kept his right hand behind his back the entire time. That's when I realized he wasn't wearing his purity ring anymore.

My heart skipped a beat.

He cracked a smile and started with, "I went to the store a day or two ago, and I got something for both of us."

He then revealed two blue boxes with ribbon in his right hand. I could hardly control myself.

"This one is for you." Shane gestured at the top box. He set the boxes and whatever was in his hand down in his lap. He untied the ribbon on my box and slipped something onto the chain. I turned around and kept my hair out of the way so he could hook the necklace around my neck.

I felt the cool touch of brass from his purity ring on the chain before anything else. Then, my eyes shifted to the sparking diamond pendant. Beside that was a huge sterling silver heart that said 'Tiffany & Co. NEW YORK'. Engraved on the back was 'Mitchie&Shane'. It looked like it was glimmering, even though the sun decided to play hide-and-seek today. At this moment, there were only clouds in broad daylight.

I turned back around and looked deep into his almond eyes. He met me halfway and kissed me passionately.

"I love it." I smiled. "You know how much this means to me."

"It means a lot to me, too," he replied. "This is mine."

He opened the second box and it was a long strip of gray silver. It looked titanium, but I found it amusing that he bought himself something from Tiffany's. It had 'Shane&Mitchie' carved into the back of his. He picked up my purity ring that I threw at him the other day from his lap. He slipped it onto the chain and put his necklace on himself.

"There, now we both have our purity rings with the righteous owners. And again, I'm sorry for the way I acted," Shane apologized.

I hushed him. "Don't ruin the moment."

"I love you." He kissed me once more. "So how was your day?"

I sighed. "Do I really have to repeat that history?"

"That's exactly what I meant. Larry's pretty tough on newbies." He lifted his hand to stroke my cheek.

"Tough? I might be mistaken, but that's definitely an understatement. He wouldn't stop telling me how much I sucked."

Shane looked at me. "You do _not_ suck. He tears everyone apart but then builds them back up again into a more confident, ready person. I'm sure your hope seems bleak right now, but seriously, we _all_ had to go through him, and now, he's like my mentor."

"But you had Nate and Jason there with you, didn't you?"

"You think he let us be together? He practically shipped us off to different studio buildings just so he would be able to intimidate us in every way possible." Shane laughed.

"Isn't that the slightest bit creepy? Why are you laughing?" I asked.

"He's really not that tough at all. He has a soft spot for animals and he cries pretty easily. As a fellow prankster, I would know."

I giggled quietly. "I'll remember that. Thanks." I planted a kiss on his nose.

"Oh, and I lied," he said.

"About what?"

"I didn't just happen to go to the store the other day. I got these necklaces online. The only Tiffany's is in New York, and I've spent all my time with you."

I laughed at how he felt the need to inform me on such a minor detail. I was more focused on the ring that's strung on my necklace. A ring: a symbol of eternity, a circle that never ends.

--

Shane drove me home that night. He quickly kissed me goodnight as I rushed upstairs to my room.

I had nothing better to do since I wasn't going to school again tomorrow, so I just lay quietly on my bed focusing on my breathing.

My door creaked open a few seconds later and when I looked over to see who it was, Mason was leaning against my doorframe looking at me quizzically. He looked a lot more mature than I remembered him. I'd been too caught up in my own drama. Who can blame me?

"What do you want?" I grumbled at him for interrupting my peace. Don't get me wrong; Mason and I are practically best friends, but being siblings, we get on each other's nerves, too.

"Just came to ask how recording went," he replied.

I moved over on my bed to make room for him. He simply plopped down and looked at me.

"Well when you record, there has to be someone in the sound room with the switchboard, right? So I go in there ready to record and all that, and this guy named Larry seems all nice and junk. But then we have a break and I show up five minutes late after it's over and what do you know? He's breaking down all the rules for me and being incredibly mean. Later, Shane told me that he does that to all the new people, though. It was pretty weird," I explained about my day.

"Sounds weird. But hey, you'll be famous one day, even though you already are, and when you do, it will be because of your awesome voice and music, and not because of Shane's fame." He smiled.

"Am I really famous?" I didn't want to believe it, because I've only ever wanted a normal life. Falling in love with Shane and getting knocked up probably didn't help at all.

"Pretty much. You're recognized almost everywhere you go, and your face is on most of the covers of the magazines at the grocery store."

"Yeah, it gets annoying. I don't see why people are so interested in me. I haven't even shown them my talent and they're only looking at me because I'm with Shane. I don't really have an interesting life at all."

When Mason didn't reply, I looked up at him, only to see him staring at my neck.

"Is that new?" he asked about the necklace.

"Yeah, Shane gave it to me."

"Oh." He looked closer at the chain.

"Where's your purity ring? That's obviously not it. Yours has flowers engraved along the sides. And it's not on your finger…which means…"

I closed my eyes wishing he would stop.

"You _didn't_." He stared at me in disbelief.

"I only wish I didn't…"

Thinking about that night just made goosebumps rise along the crook of my neck. I subconsciously started rubbing my stomach with my thumb in little circles.

"What? And—" He looked straight down where I was rubbing.

I looked away. "And I'm pregnant," I softly finished for him.

**Gah! Summer just started and thinking I'd have more time, I was actually REALLY busy! Sorry dudes! Anyway, I started blogging. Go check it out! :) jakkyville. tumblr .com (Without the spaces&In case you haven't heard, yes, I did make up the name Aimee Lynn.)**


	9. Forbidden

**I felt as though I owed you guys a long chapter. I also realized that in a previous chapter I named her younger brother Gavin, but I don't think anyone has caught that yet! Haha, I'll fix it later. It's gonna be Mason. Don't forget to enter the contest! And check out my blog :)**

Mason didn't want to know much more than what I told him. He kept quiet about everything, and every now and then, he would ask how things were going for me. As usual, they were slowly treading along.

I was barely beginning to show, being at about three months pregnant now. I just wore looser clothing and watched my mood swings. No one really suspected anything. I still went out on dates with Shane and showed up for recordings; I just kept random shopping outings to a minimal and hid my face when I went out alone in public to avoid paparazzi. Who was I kidding? This was Burbank, California. There were bound to be scary men with cameras hiding in a bush _somewhere_.

"Family meeting!" I heard my dad call from downstairs. We've never had a "family meeting" _ever_. It must've been important so I finished washing my face in the bathroom and scurried downstairs.

I was the last one down and both my mom and my dad looked straight at me, looking angrier than I've ever seen them in my entire life.

"You want to tell me what this is about?" my dad growled.

He slammed the magazine he was holding onto our living room table. My mother stood beside him, shaking her head in disappointment.

The front cover had Shane and I walking hand-in-hand and it stated "SMITCHIE: Not so pure anymore?" and thick yellow lines circled around our left hands where our purity rings should've been.

"How could you do this to me?" my mom asked.

My dad turned to my brothers. "Did you two know anything about this?"

Jake looked simply shocked and Mason tried to achieve the same look at our dad.

"It's just another rumor. We just weren't wearing our rings. So what?" I mewed quietly.

"You expect me to believe that? You've never taken that ring off since you've gotten it. And what do you know? Suddenly, the same time yours came off, Shane's is off, too?" He shook his head in anguish.

"Jake, Mason. Upstairs," my mom ordered. My brothers rushed to their rooms as she and my father turned back to me.

"I'm sorry," I whispered so quietly I was surprised they even heard. I might as well admit to it. I wasn't going anywhere with my crappy excuses.

They both took a deep breath and let their anger melt away.

"Honey," my mom said as she sat down beside me on the sofa. "What happened to coming to me when this thought was going through your head? Sex isn't something you can just play around with. Not only did you disappoint your father and me, but you also broke your promise to God, to our family, and to all those fans of Shane out there. I know I'm sometimes tied up with work, but you could've come to me."

I was about to explode with a series of comebacks to what she just said since most of it was just bullshit. But then my father started talking.

"I thought we raised you up with righteous morals. You knew better than to do this. When did it happen?"

"After the album release party…"

"I thought we could trust you!" he started. He kept blabbing about how my life was pretty much screwed from here on out since they raised me wrong, yet they didn't even know to what degree was I _actually _screwed. He also went on with how I was careless and stupid and a bunch of other things I kind of just wanted to tune out.

"_Stop_," I cut my father off mid-sentence. "That's just it. You're _always _jumping to conclusions! Yes, I was being really, really, really stupid, but it already happened. Shane and I've already talked it out and we're working through it. It was a onetime thing and you guys were talking about it like that's all we do. We've only had sex _once_ and we realized how big of a mistake it was, so we're through with that until one day if we decided to get married, then we'll probably consider it again. I thought you of all people would know me better than this. I'm your _daughter_ for crying out loud; give me a chance to talk, will you? Lecturing me isn't going to help something that has already occurred, but I've already looked into the future." Of course my conversation with Shane said nothing of marriage. But, we'd talk about it eventually. We'd _have_ to.

My parents took this in.

"I hear what you're saying," my mom began. I took a deep breath, glad that they might've finally understood what I was trying to say, even though I wasn't so sure myself. "But we've already come to terms, and we've decided that we're not allowing you to see Shane ever again."

"_WHAT?!"_ I screamed at the top of my lungs.

"The decision has been made. Your record deal has also been put on hold. I've contacted Jeff already. Ever since he's met you, all he's brought was pain and confusion and wrong decisions on your part. The school even contacted me telling me you skipped school with Nate. Without meeting Shane, none of this would've happened."

Obviously, they hadn't heard everything I had said to them moments ago. Nothing I said now would even make a difference, but it didn't exactly hurt to try. I was already down to crumbs of pain.

"You guys _never_ listen to me, do you? What happened to being the parents who'd listen to their kid first before jumping to conclusions? I didn't even—"

My father jumped in. "We did listen to you. We always will. We just think this is best for you."

"You don't know _anything_ about what's best for me! Shane has been the best thing that's ever happened to me. Everything that I've gone through for him was worth it because look at where we are now. We're stronger than ever. You just have to come in and ruin everything for me, don't you? I hate you!" I spat and darted upstairs to my room.

Jake crept into my room. "Hey, what was that all about?"

I looked him dead in the eye. "I think you got the gist of what happened."

"You know, I could see why you would feel uncomfortable going to Mom and Dad about this, but you're my little sister. You could always ask me, you know."

I threw my pillow over my face. "Not you, too," I groaned.

"I'm serious, Mitchie. Why didn't you come to me when you were even considering it? You could've at least _talked _to me when you realized how stupid it was awhile later."

I was getting tired of these freaking interventions. "First off, I didn't come to you because you're usually away at college and when you _are_ back, you go off to Remy's or some club. Sure, I could've called or texted you, but it's not like you've even tried to communicate with me when you're gone. What was I supposed to do? Just call you one day after weeks of not talking to you and be like, _'Hey, I just had sex with Shane and I have a few regrets. I want to talk about it with you'_?! Secondly, you're so overprotective. I bet the thought of me even being near Shane right now makes you want to punch him in the face. You have to be more realistic than that, Jake. Your little sister isn't so little anymore," I remarked. "So excuse me for not running straight to you. It was a little difficult for me at the time."

"Mitch, I'm so sorry." He walked over to my bed and hugged me. I don't think he has ever done that before. As kids, we had fun together, but it was all pranks and goofing off. Ever since he went off to college we kind of became mutual acquaintances.

"It's okay. I'm just kind of tired of people telling me I've been a disappointment to them today." I stared at my multi-colored, fuzzy slippers. Shane had bought them for me when he took a trip to Spain. That put me on the verge of tears.

"Hey, look at me." I looked up at Jake. "You're not a disappointment to me. You never will be. Sure, I wish you would've waited until the night of your wedding, but hey, it's already happened."

"Thanks," I told him.

I wasn't completely in the mood to open up about my feelings since I was kind of in a state of numbness. He took the sign and left my room.

As the door clicked close behind him, I let my tears fall.

I picked up the phone and dialed Shane's number.

"Hey babe, what's up?" he answered.

"I—I'm not allowed to go out with you anymore," I hesitantly forced out.

"What? Why?" he asked, surprised.

"It's a long story, but my parents found out about our onetime sex thing and…they kind of exploded," I said slowly. I sniffed throughout my words and tried to keep my sobbing to a minimum.

"Oh."

It was silent for about two minutes.

"So what are you going to do?" Shane mustered the courage to ask.

"I really don't know right now."

"What do you mean?"

"Right now, I'm not quite sure of anything. Not only am I not allowed to go out with you, I can't see you. My record deal has been put on hold and everything is just falling apart at the seams," I explained to him as calmly as I could.

"I'm so sorry. So… What about _us_?" he asked as if it wasn't obvious enough.

"I told you what my parents said."

"But is that what _you_ want?"

"You don't get it, do you? I respect my parents a lot. No matter how much I feel like I loathe them right now, they've given me everything I've needed my entire life and I'm not going to go around pretending that what they think means nothing to me. I know you've grown up with pretty loose parents, but it's not like that for everyone. Not everyone gets to be as free as a bird like you with loads of cash." I regretted that as soon as it came out of my mouth. Stupid, stupid hormones.

"I wasn't aware that that was how you thought of me," he said, sounding hurt.

"It's not. I didn't mean that. I'm sorry."

"Are you sure? 'Cause it sounded to me like that was some true emotion there."

"Shane, I really didn't mean that. I'm just really irritable. I don't mean to take it out on you," I apologized.

"Okay..."

"I don't want to break it off, and I don't want to disrespect my parents. I just—I don't know. I'm kind of confused and shocked. But ultimately, I think I'm going to do what my parents are asking. It's what I have to do, not what I want to. I'm not going to be able to see you anymore."

"I'm not sure what to say," Shane honestly answered.

"Look, just promise me you won't give up on me."

"I promise."

--

I showed up to school, feeling, looking, and acting dull. I had already told Nate and Remy everything like I normally would.

They both greeted me with a tight embrace. "I'm really sorry," Nate said as Remy stood on the other side of me.

"Yeah, me too," I said.

Remy had to go out to eat with her entire family that night as well just as my family left me home alone. One call to Nate about my state of misery, and he showed up at my door with a bucket of popcorn and some sappy chick flicks.

I knew he absolutely despised chick flicks and watching girls cry so after a good sob session during a heartbreaking scene, I looked up at him from where I was leaning on him. I was about to tell him how much I appreciated his presence, but before I could let even a single word slip out of my mouth, he already knew what I was going to say.

"It's what best friends are for," he said.

He spent the night in my room. My parents didn't even care he was sleeping in my room, just because he wasn't Shane, which definitely irritated me.

I woke up around noon time to the smell of chocolate chip pancakes. I groggily walked downstairs to see Nate cooking and a note on the refrigerator from my mom saying "You probably needed the extra sleep. Love, Mom." What was going on? Suddenly she was being nice for a day after destroying the sunshine in my life?

I was distracted by the smell of the pancakes so I decided just to accept her sort-of-apology. I must've had an intellectual look on my face, since Nate asked what I was thinking.

"Well a lot's going through my mind," I answered briefly.

"When are you going to tell Shane?" he asked.

"About what?"

He glared at my stomach area. "The baby."

"I'm not sure."

"You know, you might want to tell him so that he knows he's going to have to grow up a little bit faster. Say, in about half a year?"

"Yeah, I know. I just don't know how or when."

"Waiting isn't going to make it any easier," he pointed out.

"Tell me something I don't know."

**Yeah, I'm trying to **_**get**_** to the major point of interest (wink, wink). I have an outline for this story, and I looked it over today. I know PLENTY of you guys just want him to find out already, so I'm combining what **_**were**_** about three chapters into one. Hopefully the next chapter should be up by the 21****st**** of June! I'm going to Florida on that day, so as a treat, I'll try to get it up ASAP. :)**

**This story isn't even half over and I'm **_**just**_** getting to the exciting part lol. But either way, I've already been planning for the future and I've typed up this one story idea…I think it would only make like five chapters, but I think I'd enjoy that.**

**If any of you have **_**any**_** story ideas, they're appreciated! It's best if you can PM me, but putting it in your review is cool, too.**


	10. Rumors

**Thanks for the reviews! The winner is ****–drinkingfiction.****!! She gets kudos for having an ultra ninja-like description of herself and an uber cool username! Thanks to all of you who have entered! Wow, I just ended the last four sentences with exclamation points…**

**Anyway, on with the story:)**

I really didn't know what to do. My parents were in the house, and I wasn't about to go and call Shane, but I also didn't want to just shut him completely out of my life. I _wanted_ to comply with their wishes. That should count for something, right?

But the fact of the matter is: it's a scientifically proven fact that I couldn't live without him. He was everything to me.

I wasn't the kind of person who worked up magical plans to disobey my parents, so I sat in my room, waiting for some miracle to happen so that they'd leave the house.

I turned up the radio and clutched my comforter as close as I could to myself. I sang along to Shane's voice through my tears. Right when I thought '_Hey, maybe I'll get through this,'_ everything blows up in my face and what do you know? My life is spiraling downward, yet again.

I heard a clinking, almost tapping noise behind me. I turned only to look out the window at the open sky. I dismissed it as a tree brushing against the glass and faced back toward my pillow.

The sound came again and this time, I turned around fast enough to see a rock fly upward.

I ran to my windowsill and pushed open the glass.

"Mitchie!" Shane called from behind a shrub in my backyard.

"What—"

"I'm coming up!" He ran toward the pipe that ran from the ground to my second-story window before I could object.

I couldn't watch while he climbed seeing as I'd probably faint from being so worried that we would fall. I heard a series of grunts and pleas of help. Before I knew it, I saw one of his arms fly and hook over my windowsill.

"Care to help me out?" he said with a strained voice.

"Oh, sorry." I helped him over into my room. I punched him hard in arm as soon as he was on sturdy ground.

"Ow! I came to see you and this is how you greet me?" he asked, rubbing his arm.

"What the hell are you doing here?" I scolded him in a hushed tone.

"You told me never to give up on you," he replied easily.

"I meant to not give up on making our _relationship_ work. I never told you to sneak into my room through my window unexpectedly at night and especially _not_ while my parents are still in the house!"

"Bad timing?" he guessed.

I sighed. "Ya think?"

Shane looked back out the window. "Well I'm not going to be able to leave the same way I came in," he said.

"Well this is great," I mumbled, brushing my fingers over my cheek.

He sat down beside me on the edge on my bed and smoothed my hair behind my ear. "Have you been crying?"

"Ha," I laughed out loud sarcastically. "What would make you think that?"

"Mitchie, tell me what's wrong."

"I think it's pretty obvious that I'm frustrated and angry. But mostly angry."

"Well you could tell me all your frustrations, and then maybe you won't be as angry," he suggested.

I took a breath. "I'm frustrated because my parents won't listen to me. I'm mad at myself mostly for being so stupid and having sex and making you break your promise to your family and God, too. And I want to break something because I worked so hard trying to get any recording company to look my way, and when I finally nail a contract and get everything going, _this_ happens."

"Whoa, there. Why are you blaming yourself for what happened? It takes two people to have sex."

I blushed a little. That was pretty much common knowledge. "Well yeah, but I do remember some of that night. _I_ was the one who kept pushing you farther and farther. Just like _I_ was the one to suggest it, and _I_ was the one who kept wanting more," I pointed out.

"Stop it." This took me aback. "Look, I'm a guy. I have desires, too. You didn't make me break my promise to my family and God, I chose that. I don't regret it one bit. Do you?"

I didn't know what to say to that, so I said nothing.

He stood up slowly. "Well, I understand, I guess."

I stood up right in front of him and reached up to cup my hand over his cheek. "Don't take that the wrong way. I love you _so_ much. I just wish I could've remembered it more, you know? Waiting couldn't have hurt, is all I'm saying."

He pulled my hand that was on his cheek and kissed it tenderly. "You're right, and I love you, too. It did happen, though, and we can't do anything to change that."

"I know…"

There was a knock on my door.

"Quick, hide!" I whispered. "Do you know what would happen to me if my parents found out you were here?"

He raced to my closet, opened it, realized there were too many bags and no space, and closed it again. Then he dove for the ground and tried sliding under my bed.

"Who is it?" I called out casually. I helped him by lifting up my blankets and covers that were draping over the entrance. "Don't even breathe," I warned under my breath.

"It's Mom. I need to talk to you."

"Just a minute," I said, advancing toward the door as Shane tucked his entire body underneath my bed.

I plastered an artificial smile on my face and opened the door.

"Hey honey," she said, walking into my room. "We need to talk."

"About what?" I asked giddily.

"What's with the sudden energy?" my mother asked while making herself comfortable on my bed.

"Well," I started, racking my brain for excuses, since I really didn't know why I was even smiling. "I thought about what you and dad said and I realized you were right. Even though it doesn't seem like the best idea right now, it'll probably benefit me in the long run. So I wanted to thank you for looking out for me," I said quickly and impatiently, hoping she would leave soon.

"That's what parents are for, but that's not what I came to talk to you about. I didn't come to tell you to understand what we were trying to show you, and I didn't—"

I cut her off. "So what _did_ you come for?" I said, pushing her to the point already.

"I was getting there. Your father and I realize that you are indeed growing up, and what you did was quite dumb, stupid, ridiculous—"

"Unwise, foolish, unintelligent, imprudent… I think I got it," I finished for her.

"Yeah, well it already happened, and we realize we should trust you when you say it won't happen again until marriage," she said.

"So I'm allowed to see Shane again?"

"With restrictions. Jeff Reagan said they'd love it if you could still record for them, but we're holding it off for a week. Until then, you'll attend school again. And you are allowed to go out on dates with Shane _as long_ as you have adult supervision."

I was going to burst again with how ridiculous that would be. In a little bit over a year, I'll be an adult _myself_. But then came reality and I realized it was better than nothing. "Okay, thanks. Tell Dad that, too. I'm really sorry I disappointed you. I should've listened and waited."

"Do I get a hug?" Mom asked.

"Of course."

We shared a brief mother-daughter moment when I realized Shane was still under the bed without her knowledge.

"I'm going to go to bed soon," I said to her.

"All right, I'll leave you to your business. Dad and I are going to go tango tonight." She left the room as I closed the door behind her.

I looked over my shoulder to see Shane climbing out of the confined space holding a familiar shoebox that had certain predictions about my future.

It was already open and he showed it to me. "What are these?" he asked, glaring at the pregnancy tests.

"Oh, um…" I thought fast. "They belong to Remy."

His eyes widened. "_What_?"

"But you can't tell anyone," I added to the end of it.

"Remy and your brother…?" he trailed off, but I knew what he was getting at.

"Yeah, I don't like to think about that, but unfortunately," I lied. "Let's not talk about that now. It's none of our business. So anyway, while you were down there, did you hear? I'm allowed to see you again!" I beamed animatedly.

"How is this 'none of our business'? Especially you. You're her best friend. This is a big deal."

"I'm glad you have a heart, but really. She…doesn't want me to, um, talk about it. Yeah. That's it."

"Has she told Jake? I mean, he ought to know. I'd freak if I found out," he said casually.

_Great. Exactly what I wanted to hear._

"Good thing they aren't mine." I chuckled nervously.

"Okay, well—"

"Hey, is that the garage door I hear? I'm really getting tired." I fake yawned quickly and made him put down the box of sticks. I pulled him out my door, through the hallway, and down the stairs. "You should go. I'll talk to you later, though." I kissed him passionately before pushing him out the door. "I love you. Goodnight."

"Sweet dreams, babe," he replied while actually leaving.

"You told him _I_ was _pregnant_?!" Remy almost screamed while we were just talking side by side in her room. She sat up.

"It was my last resort! It's not like I could've said '_Oh those belong to one of my brothers,_' or '_Oops. I forgot to tell you that my mom is having another kid_'."

"That definitely was not your last resort," she retorted.

"Oh yeah? What else could I have told him?"

"Oh, I don't know…" she went on mockingly. "The _truth_?"

I was about to go on, when her door creaked open. Her mom's head popped in.

"Oh, hey Mrs. Thomas," I greeted politely.

"Hello Mitchie," she replied and turned to Remy. "Did I just hear you say that Mitchie here told someone you were pregnant?"

Remy looked at her mother in disbelief. "You've got to be kidding me. I am _not_ pregnant. It's…just a rumor."

"I was asking if you said that, not if you were directly."

"Well, yes, I guess I said that, but—"

"But what?"

"But," I spoke up, not wanting Remy to have to lie to anyone anymore, especially her mother who's a therapist, because of me, "she's only covering for me," I said softly.

"What does that mean?"

"Mrs. Thomas, the only adult who knows about this is my pediatrician and OB/GYN. I'm…pregnant," I said a little more clearly.

I could almost feel Remy's jaw drop open beside me.

"I really need to talk to someone other than my teenage friends." I burst into tears. "I have no idea how to tell my parents. I mean, what will they think of me? I don't know how to tell Shane, either. I don't know if he'll be around and support my decision in having this kid, or if he'll just run away like many teenage fathers do. You're an adult, a mother, and a therapist. You help people, right? Can you help me?" I managed to ask through my sobs.

"Oh, dear," she said after a harsh gasp. She held me in a hug and told me, "Of course I'll help you."

We had been sitting in Remy's room for two hours now, just talking everything out.

"You have no idea how much I appreciate this," I said as she offered me advice.

"Anytime, Mitchie. You're like a daughter to me."

"Thanks," I replied with a smile.

"Abortion is obviously out of the question," Mrs. Thomas continued.

"And if I'm having the baby, I don't want to give it up for adoption," I said without a doubt.

"So you're keeping it?" Remy clarified.

"Pretty much."

"So Mitchie," her mom encouraged, "how do you want to tell your parents?"

"Preferably with other adults like you around so they won't strangle me."

She looked at me and smiled. "You might think they'll do that, but they would be more interested in helping you plan for the future. I'd be happy to be there for support, though. I'm sure Remy and Nate would both love to come, also."

"I'm there," Remy chimed in.

"So when should we do this?" she then asked.

"Can we just not tell them? I mean, I can move to Zimbabwe or somewhere, have the baby, and then tell them a few years later. Maybe it won't be as hard around that time," I suggested hardly jokingly. I'd seriously take that chance if I could.

"Mitchie, you could've thought about how hard this would be before you went ahead and had sex."

"I know, I know. You don't have to criticize me, too," I said.

"I'm not trying to criticize you. I was just saying."

I was in the bathroom with Remy. There was only three more days of school before I could get back to the studio.

"I still can't believe you're pregnant. I mean, you're having a _baby_." Remy continued touching up her makeup.

"Talk about pointing out the obvious," I stated.

"Well sorry, but I'm barely used to the fact that you're dating someone famous like Shane Gray, and you've already been together for like two years. Now you're having his baby."

Just then a bathroom stall door slammed open. "What? Oh my God, everyone's going to freak when I tell them!" Allie squealed.

She ran out of the room before I could stop her. I sank to the floor as Remy stared at the exit in horror.

"Oh no…" I sobbed, holding onto my stomach. "What am I supposed to do now?"

"Maybe people won't believe her. You never know," Remy tried comforting me.

"Are you kidding me? That was Allie Reynolds. _Everyone_ believes her."

I could _feel_ my heart sink.

**So I know I said I'd give you an extra long chapter. I was going to, but I didn't want to keep you all waiting, so I split it into two. :)**

**I've learned some interesting life lessons this week and I thought I'd share one with you. Do **_**not**_** fall for someone too quickly or too hard. They do indeed have the power to shred your heart to pieces.**

**And to Taylor – Yeah, you're going to be in the next chapter. I finally figured out how to introduce you. Haha.**


	11. Truth

**This is the moment all of you have been waiting for. And I finally introduce Shane's house. :0**

From the moment I stepped foot into my house, I took a dash toward my room and stayed there.

This was the end of _everything_. Everyone would know pretty soon and I'd be forced to tell my parents. I would have to tell Shane and my parents before they hear from someone else seeing as that would be _much_ worse.

I got about fourteen texts all from people at school, asking if I really was pregnant. At this rate, the news would reach Shane pretty soon, so I'd have to tell him before it did. Before as in tonight.

When phone said it was eight o'clock, I grabbed my jacket and started downstairs. My parents weren't home yet again, so I didn't have to explain where I was going.

I opened the door and right as I felt the rush of air against my nose, I found Shane standing there with tear stained eyes.

"Shane, I—"

"When were you going to tell me?" he asked, looking like a time bomb waiting to detonate.

I looked away. I was too timid to look at his face. "Who told you?" I asked softly.

"Certainly not you," he scoffed. "You know, this is so typical of you. You never tell me anything. When you're mad, you pretend I don't exist and keep me guessing at why you won't talk to me. When you're sad, you shut me out. When you're frustrated, you take it out on me. All that I can deal with. But this?"

"I'm sorry," I whispered.

"It's a little too late for apologies. How could you do this to me?"

"I didn't know how to tell you."

"Well of course it'd be hard. I'm the father of the baby you're carrying!"

"No, really?" I spat, "Excuse me if it was a little hard for me to tell you when you couldn't even set your head straight about us having sex." By now, we were both standing in the kitchen.

He glared at me as I sighed.

Shane headed for the front door, shaking his head.

"So what? You're just going to leave me? This is just _great_," I called.

He stopped and turned around. "You know, I don't know what I'm going to do. I just have to…think."

--

He walked out the door and all I could do was watch him leave. After about an hour of standing in the exact same spot, I decided to chase after him. I had questions that needed answers.

I showed up at his house. It was still the tall and intimidating structure that always drove me away, but that wasn't keeping me from barging in this time.

I grabbed the key from under the doormat and let myself in.

Shane was sitting at his kitchen islander, doing what looked to me like writing a song.

"What do you want?" he huffed.

I took no time to think of a way to make it subtle. "I want to know why you keep running away. Can't you just stay in one place and accept that you've made mistakes? Can't you just be there when I need you? Where's the guy I fell in love with?"

He looked away, agitated. "Did you come here only to yell at me? 'Cause I've got better things to do than to take your crap."

"My _crap_? Forgive me for coming to talk some sense into the father of the child I'm going to give birth to in a few months," I fumed.

"Whatever," he mumbled carelessly.

I walked straight up to him and slapped him hard across his right cheek.

He turned his head back toward me, stretching out his jaw and looking like he deserved it.

"Shane, I have spent _days_ crying my eyes out, being worried of what my parents might do to me if I told them about this. I've thought long and hard about how to tell you, too, but something always told me that even if you were furious, you'd still love me," I said, my voice starting to crack.

"I do love you," he replied.

"Then why do you keep running away?" I asked, even though I felt like I didn't necessarily want to hear the answer.

"Because I'm scared. I'm scared of losing you one day. I'm scared that people only like me because of what I have. I'm scared that no one really loves me as much as they say they do. And now, I'm scared of being a father."

I turned around ready to leave right then and there when he grabbed my arm. I tried to keep walking, but his grip was too strong.

"Stop, you're hurting me!"

He turned me around and let go.

I hit him in the chest with my fist as tears flew down my cheeks. As helpless as I may be with my weak punches, it felt decently good to let out some anger. "_You're_ scared?" I started. "Try having to think about going into labor, or having an unreliable boyfriend who never seems to be there when you need him most, or letting your dream slip away because you know that in a few months, you're gonna have to take care of another human being with or without the help from the father of your kid." I stopped punching and let another tear fall from my eye. "A how could you say that? How could you say that no one really loves you? What, do you think I've been lying to you all this time?" I hit him one last time.

I felt him pull me into the mold of his body, running his fingers through my hair. I tried to yank myself away, but he only held on tighter. I sobbed into his chest. He placed a kiss on my head gently.

He shook his head. "It's not like that. I know that _you_ love me. But it's like my parents never love me enough to be in the same house as me for more than a weekend out of every month. Like my band mates only attempt to get along with me when there's money or you involved."

"Don't say that."

We stood there staring blankly into each other's eyes.

He looked away. "You know I love you. Just give me some time."

I nodded and wiped away most of my tears. I grabbed my car keys and headed out the door.

--

I didn't want to head straight home, so I kept driving until I pulled into a local grocery store.

My first instinct was to call Remy, but then I remembered she went to a slumber party with the rest of the cheerleaders.

I hit my speed dial.

"Hey, what's up?" Nate answered mindlessly.

"Yeah, um…" I wasn't prepared with anything to say. In fact, I didn't even notice that I never stopped crying.

"What's wrong?" he said, sounding like he just put down whatever he was doing to focus on me.

"I—," I began to say, but broke out in even more tears. "Shane knows, Nate. I just—I don't know what to do."

"Are you at home?"

"Not exactly," I answered.

"Where are you?"

"In my car. In a parking lot."

"Do you remember where Jason lives?"

"Um, I think so. He's back in town?"

"Yeah. Listen to me. Whatever Shane said was probably just from shock. So as you're driving here, don't forget to breathe," he advised.

I smiled. "Yes, Mom," I teased.

"Promise?"

"Yeah, sure."

I drove in the opposite direction of where my house was located, willed myself to get out of my car, and slowly trudged up the stairs leading to the front door. I blew my nose and cleaned myself up before attempting to reunite with an old friend, even though I came for mainly for someone else.

I pressed the doorbell. No one answered for about a good five minutes. Just as I was about to leave, a girl with sandy, almond-shaded hair and hazel—well, they were a much complex color, but I'm sticking to 'hazel' for now—eyes opened the door.

I bit my lip. "Oh, I think I have the wrong house. Sorry," I said, sticking my hands in my jean pockets and turning around to leave.

I got down four stairs before she called after me.

"Hey, you're Mitchie Torres. You're dating Shane Gray, aren't you?"

I turned back around. "That's putting it lightly," I joked halfheartedly, hoping she wouldn't see through me.

When no one said anything for a few seconds, she looked closer at me. "Wow, you look a lot different without makeup on."

Talk about being blunt. "It's allergy season," I excused myself quickly. "Wait, is Jason here?"

She nodded slowly. "Um, yeah, that's why I asked about Shane, since, you know, they're band mates. Speaking of which, Nate is over."

I blushed a little. "Then I guess I _am_ at the right house."

She let me in. I followed her down to the basement.

Nate gave me a hug and soon as he saw me. I ran out of tears to cry, so I stood there, half-limp and mostly numb all over.

He brought me over to the couch where Jason and the girl who opened the door were sitting on, watching some TV.

I put on a bright smile. "Jason! I haven't seen you in forever. How's your family?" I asked, seeing as he was gone for so long because of some family emergency.

"Hey Mitchie," he said, scooting over so I could fit between him and Nate. "The whole family emergency wasn't even an emergency. They just missed me. But I finally got them to trust that I wouldn't burn my house down since I live alone."

"I'm not sure if I'm supposed to tell you that that sucks, or it's a good thing that you're not planning to set your house on fire," I said honestly.

He laughed and embraced me.

Jason is an amazing friend and all, but I couldn't tell him yet. I just needed to be alone with Nate for a few minutes.

"Can I talk to you?" I whispered to Nate so that Jason or the girl wouldn't feel like I was leaving them out. I made a face that let him know I wanted to talk to him alone.

We walked into Jason's home theater and sat down in some comfortable leather seats. I didn't want to jump into the whole I'm-desperate-because-Shane's-being-a-jerk-so-I-need-to-use-your-shoulder-to-cry-on state, so I started off with some casual talk.

"Who's that girl?" I asked, curious. She seemed like the type of person who could be a potential friend of mine.

Nate looked at me like I suddenly grew another head. "Do you live in a cave or something?"

"Not the last time I checked."

"She's Shelby Taylor Reese, the star of that new TV show about a teenage pregnancy. She's pretty famous because now she speaks out about teen pregnancies and hosts those kinds of events," he explained.

"How ironic."

This was just great. Another person who could judge me as soon as news spread around the globe.

"Look, if you think she's going to be against you from the start, you're wrong. She's really nice. Oh, and she's also Jason's new girlfriend."

I nodded, taking in the information.

"So what happened with Shane?" Nate directly asked.

"He said he needs time to think. He didn't even assure me that he was going to be there for me through this."

"Well that's kind of him," he sarcastically remarked.

I just shrugged. At that moment I really wanted nothing to do with Shane anymore. Maybe my parents were right for once in eternity; maybe I would've been better off without Shane. I mean, I wouldn't be pregnant, for one.

I filled Nate in on the rest of the details.

We went back to Jason and his girlfriend.

"Hey, your name is Shelby, right?" I said, trying to be nice so that she wouldn't shun me and do some crazy voodoo ritual when I tell Jason about my baby. Sadly, that's what I imagined that all teen spokespeople did when they heard about something they were initially against.

"My friends call me Taylor. I have a feeling we're gonna be friends, so call me Taylor," she said.

"Cool, Taylor. I'm just Mitchie, but you already knew that."

I took a seat wedged between Jason and Nate again.

I was gonna break the news to Jason right then and there. Like I said before, I was pretty numb from everything that has happened to me, so as a close friend of mine, it wouldn't really hurt anyone if I let Jason know.

"I have some news. _Big _news," I told him as soon as I sat down.

"How big?" he asked without turning his face away from the TV. It was some championship basketball game.

"Big, like I'm pregnant." I said it like it was something you hear every day.

"I see," he said, probably thinking that I was joking. "With who?"

"Shane."

"Very funny," he said laughing it off, looking at me once but turning his head back toward the screen. "Now what's the big news?"

"That _was_ the big news. I was serious."

I tried not to laugh as I watched his face completely froze and go white as he turned the TV off.

He looked over at Nate to make sure I was telling the truth. Nate did his little 'I guess so, but there's nothing we can do about it' nod.

"_How?_" he asked.

"Well I think you've learned this in health before. So you have a girl and a guy, and they—"

Jason looked at me disgusted. "_Ew_, not literally. It's just that… You've guys have had sex?"

I started rubbing my temples. "I think that's pretty obvious."

Looking away from Jason, Taylor looked almost horrified.

"I don't drop bombs like these every day," I said to her. I looked back at Jason. "I know what you're gonna ask, so to save you the trouble… We've only done it once. We were both drunk. It was after the album release party, and I only told Shane today. My parents don't know yet, but Remy's mom does. And I'm keeping the baby."

He nodded slowly. "I'm sorry you have to go through this and I'm here for you if you need me." He rubbed my back and turned the TV back on.

"I'm here for you, too, and you're secret's safe with me," Taylor spoke up.

I looked at her a little closer. She dressed pretty sophisticatedly and had that look to her that made her seem a lot more intellectually older.

--

The next morning, Shane showed up in my room unexpectedly.

"I thought you needed some time to think," I said, not really minding his company, but turning away to finish the drawing I've been working on of a daffodil.

He didn't speak for quite some time but I could feel his presence, so I turned around to find out what he came here for.

"I don't think I can do it," he said.

"Do what? You haven't been doing anything."

"I don't think I can stay here much longer. I just need to get away for awhile."

"Okay," I said simply, putting on a brave face like I didn't care. A part of me didn't, but anyone who knew me well enough would know I lie to myself all the time.

He walked up to my chair, bent down, and kissed me. I barely kissed back.

"I love you," he said.

"Yep," I said, and pulled away from him.

He sighed and walked out of my bedroom. He walked out of my life. At least it felt that way.

**So it looks like it's gonna take a long time for the next chapter to come out. Yeah, you guys are probably going to hate me as much as I hated Stephenie Meyer in **_**New Moon**_**. But I promise it's not gonna last long haha:)**

**Just a question that I **_**really**_** need answered: How do you feel about Nitchie (Nate/Mitchie) as a couple? You can probably guess why I'm asking, but I can tell you now that whatever you're thinking is completely WRONG, but idk, some people are totally for it, then others are like "ABSOLUTELY NOT. ONLY ONE DAY IN HELL SHOULD NATE AND MITCHIE EVER WIND UP TOGETHER," and then they're people like me who are neutral about the whole thing.**

**And to Taylor – This isn't like your "only appearance" or anything. I just let people know you exist. Anyway, I hope I didn't offend you by creating this character somewhat modeled after you. lol I really enjoy tagging this little note to you at the end. I don't know why… I think it makes me feel in control. Muahaha. xD**


	12. Fall

**Thanks for the feedback:) I realize that the majority of my audience hates Nitchie, but half of them also tagged at the end "**_**but it's your story, so do whatever you want**_**" and that's exactly what I was going for haha.**

Awhile turned into a day, which turned into days, which turned into weeks. It's been three weeks, and no one I know has heard from him since.

No matter how much I wanted myself to not care, it hurt. Shane was my first real love and the father of my future child. Those were the two things I couldn't change. And I'm pretty sure I'm still in love with him.

Shane left me alone and vulnerable, but I guess I saw this coming in the very beginning. He fled again just as he had the day after we had sex.

I didn't know what to think anymore. Sure, my heart was telling me I love him, but he's put me through so much pain, and I wasn't sure if I could keep doing this. I looked over at the small plastic bag of a few of my mom's sleeping pills. I'd been sneaking one sporadically so she wouldn't notice them missing in large amounts. I didn't know if I would even do anything with the pills, but having them made me feel a little less helpless and weak to the rest of the world.

Random thoughts flew through my head on a daily basis; this was just one of those spontaneously interesting ideas I had never really thought through.

--

"Come in!" I called when someone knocked on my bedroom door.

"Hey," Nate said, plopping down next to me on my bed.

I waved my hand in the air at him, not wanting to say anything.

"Still depressed about Shane?"

I looked at him dumbly.

"I'll take that as a _yes_," he answered himself.

"I'm not depressed. I'm just furious. And I'm not sure if I should be worried," I explained myself.

"I'm sure he's fine. He's Shane Gray. What more do you expect?"

"You know, that's a very good point." I flipped over on my bed, face down.

Nate laid a hand on my back. "I don't get why you keep letting Shane walk all over you and hurt you repeatedly."

"I don't know why either," I said in a muffled voice.

"I'm sure I could even be a better boyfriend," he whispered softly, obviously implying something, but I didn't know what.

I didn't know if I heard him right. Well, at least I hoped I didn't.

"What?" I asked, sitting up.

"Nothing, nothing. I said nothing."

I gawked at him. How could he be saying things like that at a time like this? I had enough stress already with Shane just disappearing; I couldn't deal with more drama in my love life. Nate was so sweet and sensitive and funny and kind and caring and—well, realizing those qualities of his wasn't helping anything. I didn't see him as a _boy_friend. Just a friend. A best friend. And I hoped that he could find it in his heart to feel only that for me as well.

"Okay, so maybe I was just thinking about the little moment we had when you and Shane were broken up…"

"Nate, that kiss in the closet didn't mean anything. I thought we already talked about this." I rubbed my temples. "_Please_ tell me you don't have feelings for me."

"I don't have feelings for you," he said simply.

I looked at him. "Tell me the truth."

"I don't think you'd like the answer, so I'm just gonna go. I'm sorry." He grabbed his jacket.

"No, don't be sorry. You can't help it," I tried to say. But it was too late.

He looked away and continued out the door.

I didn't know who to call anymore. I'd usually call Shane, Nate, or Remy whenever I had an issue, but this issue involved both Shane and Nate, and recently I've been feeling like I've been keeping Remy from all the fun she could be having, so I always encourage her to go out with friends since I can't go with her myself. She had cheer practice tonight anyway. Since Jason was back, why not just go to him?

I called before I drove myself there.

"Welcome," Jason said in an animated voice as he opened the door. He frowned when he saw my face. I probably looked like a mess. "What happened?" he asked as he let me in and shut the door behind us.

"Well, Shane's been gone for three weeks, but you already knew that, and Nate just indirectly confessed his love for me today," I said.

Taylor walked down the stairs wearing one of Jason's band tees and some Soffes.

I assumed the worse of their sharing clothes and spending the night with each other. "You guys didn't '_you know_', did you?" I asked.

Taylor and Jason both looked equally shocked.

"No," Jason spoke up. "We don't do that. She's been spending the last three weeks here, and we've already decided that we won't have sex until we're married."

"Yeah. The answer to your question is a big, fat '_no_'," she added.

"So anyway, Nate finally confessed his love for you?" Jason repeated, changing the subject.

I crossed my arms. "What do you mean, _finally_?"

"It's kind of obvious that he's had a crush on you since forever ago."

"You never noticed? Even I could tell and I've only known Nate for a month tops," Taylor said.

I texted Remy asking if she ever got the impression that he liked me, and she had the exact same response.

"Am I the only one who didn't know about this?" I fell onto the couch.

"And Shane," Jason pointed out. "He would've killed Nate if he knew about it."

"Yeah, I guess, but I never saw the signs!" I replied in my defense.

"You seriously haven't noticed all the times he held the door open for you, or when he came to your rescue when Shane was being idiotic, or the times when he's a little too overprotective or worries too much about you?" Jason wondered.

"I thought he just had manners."

"I noticed that he smiles at your presence or even when your name is mentioned in a conversation," Taylor chimed in.

It was silent for a few minutes.

"You're not gonna go out with Nate now, are you?" Jason asked.

"I wasn't really planning on it, but he's the one who has always been there for me. Not Shane. And I'm not just going to tell him a flat-out '_no_' because I honestly don't know."

Taylor yawned, and then stretched. She grimaced. "Ah, drama."

--

I didn't know how I was going to balance my life with an unreliable boyfriend. I don't even know if I could call him that anymore.

I decided to explore the possibilities. The only thing that mattered to me at the moment was this baby and what was best for him or her.

I knew how much I wanted to keep this baby, but it couldn't hurt to do some research, right?

I logged onto the Internet and looked up everything about open and closed adoptions. I sat for hours in front of my laptop.

As I opened yet another page about finding the right family, Nate walked into my room unexpectedly. I didn't know what to say to him after this morning's events, so I said nothing.

"I think you should know that I wasn't just doing it to aggravate you," he started.

"Doing what?"

"Telling you the truth."

I nodded for him to continue.

"I'm not gonna tell you that I don't have feelings for you, because I do. I can't change that and I'm not asking you to just take your chances with me even with your unresolved problems with Shane. The bottom line is that I care about you, and I'm here for you in whatever shape or form you need me to be," he said in one breath.

I scooted over, closed my laptop and put it away, and pulled my covers back. "You know I can't stay mad at you for long," I whispered, allowing him to join me.

I didn't know what I was thinking. On a second thought, I was probably encouraging him to be in love with me.

He tossed his jacket onto my desk chair and got into the bed.

"Look, Nate, I might've accidentally led you on a few times and I wanted to make it clear that I want nothing more than best friends."

"Sounds good to me," he said.

We fell asleep soon enough, keeping our distance from each other to prevent any more awkwardness.

--

By the time I woke up, it was already late afternoon and Nate was gone. I groggily brushed my teeth before going downstairs to fix myself some breakfast.

Jake stormed in, slamming the door behind him while he was on the phone.

"I tried my hardest!" he yelled into the phone. Even though he was a good forty feet away from me, I could hear someone screaming at him from the other line.

"Well you know what? You can't blame everything on me!" He paused to listen to the response and went on, "Yes I meant what I said, but I guess it doesn't mean anything anymore now that you want to reevaluate our relationship, whatever that means!"

I figured it was Remy. Jake was standing at the front door fuming at whatever was coming out of her mouth.

I walked right up to him, snatched his phone, and said "He'll call you back," into the receiver just before I shut it. The thing that always happened with Jake was that he'd get too angry too fast too soon.

"What was that?!" he roared at me.

I cringed at his tone and tried to tell him the truth as calmly as I could. "We both know that you're a little hot-tempered, so before you screw things up with Remy, think about what you're gonna say," I warned.

I handed his phone back to him and carried on making myself some cereal.

"I want to break something!" he fumed to no one in particular, pulling out a seat at the breakfast table.

I handed him a Nutri-Grain bar. "I heard eating healthy makes you more mentally fit," I teased.

He took it gently and then crushed it in his fist.

I took my bowl of cereal and sat down on a stool next to him. "So maybe you should tell me what's wrong. Guys usually get frustrated when they don't know what their girlfriend is thinking, so luckily for you, I'm pretty good at knowing how Remy thinks."

Jake looked me over.

"Or you could start with some deep breaths," I suggested when I noticed he was really tense.

I ate my cereal like nothing was happening. It didn't affect me much, anyway. It wasn't like Jake would hurt me. Sure, he'd get a little annoyed, but that what sisters are for.

He finally started talking. "She doesn't think this long distance relationship thing is working out."

"Well maybe you did something that's triggering these feelings from her," I stated like a law of science.

He thought about that for a moment and got up to get a bottle of water from the fridge. He sat back down and shrugged. "I haven't been doing anything differently."

"So maybe that's the problem," I figured. "I mean, she probably thinks your relationship is dull now because you're a college hunk and she's only in high school. Like, maybe she thinks you think she's not good enough."

"A college hunk?" he repeated, almost admiring my choice of words.

"Oh, don't get an ego boost out of that. I'm trying to help you fix your problems."

"And why did you have to start out with the whole '_you probably did something_' accusation? Do I always have to be wrong?"

I shook my head slowly. "Tsk, tsk. You have a lot to learn."

"Like what?" he asked, about to open his bottle to take a drink.

"Like," I said, grabbing his bottle and screwing the lid back on. I hit him in the arm with it. "The girl is always right no matter how much _you_ think she messed up."

"That's hardly fair!"

"Life's not fair," I answered. I gave him his water bottle back.

"Why must you reveal the unappreciated truth in relationships to me? I'd rather screw things up with a girl," he mumbled.

"Not when that 'girl' happens to be best friends with your younger sister." I got off my stool to dump out the rest of my cereal, and gave him a pat on the shoulder. "And it's called 'tough love'."

--

I couldn't go another day knowing that Shane's avoiding everyone including his friends and family just so he can avoid me. At this point, I didn't even know if he was alive or not, and I wasn't sure of the percentage of how much I cared.

Maybe if I hadn't even existed, no one I've affected would ever have to go through any more pain caused by me. I've stirred up enough trouble with the world already.

I looked down at the sleeping pills that I cradled in my hand.

I walked over to my bathroom sink and filled the glass I used to brush my teeth with water.

_3…2…1_, I counted silently in my head.

I threw the pills in my mouth all at once and washed them down with the water.

_3…2…1_, I counted again.

Before I knew it, I plunged toward the tile floor and my vision kept fogging until it seemed like everything was black.

**Yeah, this might stir up some questions, so don't be afraid to ask. I'm pretty clear as far as what I want Mitchie to appear to be feeling. If you guys leave reviews sounding like you're completely bewildered at the ending of this chapter, I'll be sure to explain it more in the beginning author's note for the next chapter.**


	13. Change

**Like I predicted, most of you were like "NO NO NO!!" And I'm here to tell you that the reason she did that was because she couldn't take it anymore. She wanted out on this whole life thing and in this chapter I'm sure you'll see what she's thinking. I realize that she went from being totally chipper and witty to a complete depressed disaster. In one review, someone said that Mitchie was being contradictive since she wanted what was best for the baby, but then she goes and tries to kill herself. The thing with that is that a lot of responsibility and selflessness is attached to parenthood. She hasn't learned that yet. In the last chapter, she never knew if she was going to be okay for the day or if she would break down and cry. No matter how Shane seemed like he had PMS, he was **_**still**_** her rock. And he left her. I don't think I've made it clear how strong their bond was/is. Shane just leaving Mitchie was equal to tearing her world apart and leaving her alone to die. She's a bit hormonal so any overreaction is normal. Hormones with the added depression from abandonment is what caused her little mishap (or, rather, BIG mishap). I hope that cleared some things up.**

**& some reviews for Chapter 11 were **_**quite**_** nasty and mean. Some of you never even gave me or my story a chance! And I was just really disappointed that some of you can't use you're imaginations; I was simply **_**exploring**_** the idea. Just for the record, I was 100 percent Smitchie all along.**

**Thank you SO much to those who kept an open mind. I just learned to appreciate you guys that much more.**

I attempted to open my eyes, but I couldn't. My lids were too heavy, almost like I forgot how to make my muscles pull them open.

I could feel the needles and tubes that penetrated my skin. They were dislodged in my flesh. I tried to reach over and pull a few of them out, but my arms wouldn't bulge either.

I was so…uncomfortable. I had no control in anything other than my thoughts, like the fact that the most grating beeping noise buzzed in my ear, and I couldn't do anything about it.

"I hope she's okay," Nate said. Even in whatever state I'm in, I could recognize his voice.

"Me too," Remy replied to him. "I should've spent more time with her. I didn't realize that she was _this_ depressed. Sure, she had some issues that needed working out, but—I don't know. I feel kind of bad."

"Rem, you know it's nothing anything of us could've prevented."

I could _feel_ Remy's glare at him.

"Okay, so maybe we could've kept an eye on her or something. But that sounds ridiculous! We shouldn't have to keep tabs on our own best friend," he admitted.

I wanted to continue listening pretty badly, but my body had other plans. I slowly drifted off to sleep.

--

I couldn't jerk myself awake no matter how hard I tried, and believe me, I've _tried. _Where was I? All I could hear were these voices ringing in my head.

Every now and then, my parents would try speaking to me, and Mason and Jake would come ever so often. The most constant visitor was Nate. Remy usually came with him, but lately, he's been talking to me alone a lot.

I know he's desperately in love with me, but I was in no state to even want to think about personal issues right now.

Days dreaded on, all of them too repetitive. People came and left, and I struggled with trying to gain control over my body.

--

I tried opening my eyes yet again, only to be doomed to an utter and complete failure.

I felt someone picking up my fingers today. "Mitch," I heard a voice whisper.

It belonged to someone that I wasn't too thrilled about.

Someone with the name of Shane.

"I'm so sorry," he went on to say. "I was being someone I don't even know. All I know is…I love you. I'd do anything to make you happy. It's taken too long for me to realize that, and part of me almost thinks that this is a way God is making me pay for it. I know I've been really anal lately, and I really am sorry."

Just then, I could've sworn to hearing the door slam open.

"What the hell are you doing here?" another voice that sounded like Nate roared.

"I heard on the news. Why didn't you call me? God, does no one ever tell me anything?" Shane barked back.

"You're shitting me, right? What, am I being Punk'd? Dude, Mitchie spent hours calling you only to get your voicemail; you never once cared enough to tell anyone where you were for an entire month; you ran off after you found out she was pregnant, and the last time I checked, the father is supposed to _stick around _especially if they claim to loving the mother; and you expect someone to _tell _you?" he spat.

Shane let go of my hand. "I don't need this from you," he told Nate.

"Well you need to hear it from _someone_."

"What are you saying?"

"Mitchie is an amazing girl. She's going through her pregnancy practically alone. If you don't step up to the plate and take your responsibility, I will."

That kind of shocked me.

"Are you implying something?" Shane continued to ask.

"I'm saying that she deserves better than what you've been giving her."

Shane saw right through what Nate was trying to say for once. "So you like her. _Wonderful_. Get real. Who do you think she's gonna choose?"

Nate fought back. "Did you not just hear a word I said to you? _I'm_ the one who has stuck by her through the thick and thin. _I'm_ the one who she calls when she has trouble. _I'm_ the one she goes to when someone"—he coughed animatedly—"ruins her day. Are you so self-absorbed that you think she'll forget all the pain you left her with for an entire thirty days? Not only then, but ever since you've become this jerk? And let me tell you… It's been quite some time."

Shane grunted a little. It's what he does when he tries to hold back his anger. "Look, I'm trying to change, all right?"

"A little late, don't you think?" Nate scoffed. "I'd bet on anything that I would be a _much_ better father to your kid than you'll ever be."

"Except for the fact that it's _my_ child who was created with _my_ sperm," he bravely replied. I almost wish they knew I could hear their conversation. Are guys really so open with topics like that?

"DNA means nothing," Nate said.

"We'll see who she chooses when she wakes up, all right?" They were probably sharing a long glare at each other. "We were best friends at a point, weren't we? What happened to that?" he asked, changing the subject and breaking the silence.

"That ship sailed along with your sincerity a long time ago," Nate answered simply.

I could sense the confused look on Shane's face. He never understood anything.

"Have you seriously not seen what you've been putting Mitchie through? _Everything_ you've put her through?" With that, I heard Nate's footsteps get softer and softer as he left the room.

My hand was picked up again. "Mitchie, I need to know you're there. Just move a finger and let me know you're there," Shane said, his voice shattering to pieces.

I tried as hard as I could to bend my right index finger.

Nothing.

He let go of my hand. "All right, well, I guess I have to go. Your family won't be too thrilled to see me here."

He left a loving kiss on my forehead just as he left.

--

Today, I felt heaving breaths above my head. I did the same routine with trying to move my fingers, arms, legs, and then eyes.

I felt much too weak for any real physical movement, but when I tried opening my eyelids, images came fluttering at me.

Everything was so…white. There were white curtains, chairs, tables, and even everything I was laying on and wearing was white.

I looked up to see who was breathing on me.

Shane's face was towering above me on my right, and Nate was on my left.

"This isn't awkward," I said in a strained voice. I stared at them until they moved.

They both stood at the end of the bed, watching me. It was the most uncomfortable situation I could've been in with both of them.

"Mind explaining this?" I said to both of them to break the silence. I was too weak to show any more anger towards Shane than I had already felt, and I was even beginning to be mad at Nate for his acting like I see him as boyfriend-material. I was going to treat them like we were all mutual acquaintances and like I had my dignity.

Shane shook his head and slowly walked across the room. Apparently he wasn't too happy to see me either, which was completely ridiculous since _he_ was the one who left.

"Well _first_, you tried to kill yourself," Nate began seeming a little livid. "And _now_, you're in the hospital. Funny how things work, right?"

"You're mad," I said more as a statement than a question.

"No kidding."

No one said anything after that. It was just quiet. Too quiet.

Even after everything Shane has done, I felt bad seeing him sitting as far away as he could get from me, staring at the rain out the window.

"Nate, can I talk to Shane alone?"

He shrugged. "Yeah, whatever."

As soon as Nate was out of the room, Shane started. "How could you be so stupid?" He punched wall. He stormed past the bed I was on and grunted. Then before I knew it, he punched his fist at the wall. A usual wall would just puncture and create a hole, but apparently the walls in this hospital had steel bars in them.

"How could you leave me like that?" I asked, regretting feeling bad for him just moments ago.

"I told you I needed to think," he said like that would answer all my questions.

"Yeah, _think_. As in, sitting around your house for some time and wondering what you're gonna do. You just disappeared. Did you expect me to be all right?"

"Yes, I admit that was the stupidest thing I ever could have done in that situation, but I didn't think the baby would make you want to go attempt suicide."

I was infuriated that he didn't see my logic. "Well did you ever think I did it because of you?"

That caught his attention. He came to sit on my bed. "Did you really?"

I looked away.

When he kept quiet, I said, "I heard what you said before."

"I am _really,_ _really_ sorry. I don't know if I can ever make it up to you. I was just running away again. You even pointed it out that I did that, and I didn't listen. I thought that if I left, things would be better for you because it seemed like the more I stuck around, the more I'd hurt you. I never thought that leaving you would hurt you even more," he apologized.

I turned back around to face him. "You thought wrong."

"I know. I love you _so_ much you can't even fathom. Every day away from you killed me inside, but I was too afraid to face my problems. Not that you or the baby are problems. I love you, Mitchie Torres." He picked up my hand. "Do you still love me?"

I had to admit he got kudos for that very endearing speech, but it wasn't going to cut it.

"Yes, I do, but you can't just do something wrong, run away from everything, and then come back, apologize, and expect me to forgive you easily and willing every single time. I understand when you want some time to yourself, but you took it way too far this time. I don't think I can keep doing this," I told him.

"Mitchie, I _promise_ you I will never take off like that again. I actually did think while I was gone and you and the baby are my priority. I want to change for me and for you. For us. And the baby we're expecting. I've been acting really childish lately, and it's about time for me to grow up. I know it's not my place to ask this, but will you give me another chance?" he asked sincerely.

I didn't need more than two seconds to make my decision. It isn't every day that Shane offers to change his lifestyle for me. "Of course."

He French kissed me more passionately than I have ever been kissed.

He kept his forehead against mine. "I love you," he murmured.

"I love you, too."

"I should probably fix things with Nate later. Were you aware that he was after you?" Shane asked.

"Yeah, he made it known. But nothing really happened between us."

"All right. But I hate to break his heart," he said, hinting something.

I rolled my eyes playfully. "He already knows I only want to be friends."

He nodded, and I scooted over to make room for Shane. He lay down on top of my sheets and snuggled close to him.

The nurse eventually came in to evaluate my health.

"I see you're finally awake," the nurse said. "You were quite heavily sedated."

I smiled.

As she was doing all these checkups on the monitor that showed my heart rate, I suddenly had an important question to ask. "Do my parents know about my pregnancy?"

She grinned. "They were asking all these questions, but none of them seemed to mention it, so I assumed they didn't know yet. I talked to the doctor about it and we thought we would ask if you wanted to tell them first."

I looked back at Shane. "I'm right here with you, babe," he whispered.

**Congratulations to KEVIN JONAS AND DANIELLE DELEASA (Soon-to-be Danielle Jonas!) on their engagement!**


	14. Lovebirds

**It's my birthday in 10 days! :)**

Shane and I still hadn't told my parents. They were going to come by the hospital later on in the afternoon. We had both realized that we were running out of time and soon enough, they'd probably be able to just guess judging by my protruding abdomen.

Shane was sleeping beside me in the hospital bed. I'd woken up only for a few minutes, and the entire time I was wondering if Shane really meant what he said. Would he really change? Was he going to stay here by my side for good?

Maybe he could feel my stares through the back of his head or something, but he turned around and faced me. "Morning, beautiful."

I'd been with him for over two years, and those little pet names still made me blush like a mad woman.

Just then I felt something slam against the bottom side of my stomach. It kept going and I was scared to hell until I realized what it was.

"What's wrong?" Shane quickly asked.

"Shane," I said, grabbing his hand and pulling it under my hospital gown. I put it right on top of where the baby was kicking.

I felt his eyes go wide. "Is that…?"

"Yeah, it's the baby. _Our_ baby."

At first he looked fascinated. Then, it changed to something different. It was like the most loving expression anyone has ever given me. It was endearing in so many ways, yet I couldn't even begin to describe what it felt like.

He grinned brightly. "I already love him. Or her. Do you know the sex of the baby yet?"

I shook my head. "Don't you think I'd tell you if I knew? I've been making routine trips to the doctor's office, but they haven't told me yet."

"Oh. Well we're keeping it, right?"

"Yeah, I thought you knew that already."

"Nope. I knew you didn't believe in abortion, but I never knew how you felt about adoption and stuff," he answered.

The kicking stopped. His hand was rubbing the bottom side of my belly, and it felt pretty awkward because I realized I wasn't wearing any underwear, but he couldn't see anything. I ignored that detail because after all, I _was_ having his baby. He continued feeling my stomach, looking down at it in adoration.

The last time I saw him, he was mad that the baby even existed, and now, he looked like he was worshipping it.

"What?" he asked, after he realized I was still watching him carefully, probably sporting a thinking face.

I let out a calm sigh. "Are you actually that excited for this baby?"

"Yeah, I am. I know I've been a jerk for way too long. Like I said before, when I was gone, I thought about a lot of things. Sure, the timing's a little weird, but yes, I am glad and excited to be having a baby, especially with you." He finally moved his hand and leaned over to kiss me.

I kissed back, fierce and hungry for more.

Shane started stroking my earlobe and leaned back a bit. "I'd love to continue, but the doc is here." He maneuvered his way out of the bed and into the couch by the window.

I looked back and there was Dr. Perry, holding a clipboard and a pen.

"You and your baby were very lucky that Mason found you in time. Even if it was five minutes later, the baby or yourself probably wouldn't have survived," he told me.

I looked down. It wasn't my proudest poor decision.

"You're gonna have to stay here for another night so we can make sure you and your baby aren't at risk for any more medical complications. And as protocol, since it wasn't an accident, I have to recommend you to a counselor," he said, sounding like he was reading it right out of a pamphlet.

"Oh no, that won't be necessary. See, it was a stupid thing I did because, well, the father of my kid, also my boyfriend, had a little incident when he left for some time and everything was just going downhill, but it's getting a little brighter now. My life is finally turning around," I explained.

"It's protocol; I can't do anything about it."

"Please, since I'm not eighteen I know you have to repeat the same thing for my parents and they can't know all this. Well, not the reason why I did what I did. They still don't even know about my pregnancy and we were going to tell them the next time they came to visit. _Please_, I'm begging."

"I'm sorry, but I can't—"

Shane got up. "Just let it go. Look, she's been through enough and I'm sure we could work something out, but not now. She has too much to worry about, what with how her parent's will react."

The doctor let out a breath. "Very well," he said and began to leave. "By the way, the baby's healthy. Just don't pull another stupid stunt because next time you probably won't be so lucky." He said it in a gnarly tone.

"Watch it," Shane warned loudly just as he left.

"Thanks," I said.

He shrugged. "The guy was getting on my nerves."

--

The time came around too quickly. My parents were holding bags of groceries as they came into the room. Shane was sitting beside me, on top of the sheets on the bed.

As soon as my father saw Shane's face, his expression turned sour. "I have a bone to pick with you, kid."

"Mr. Torres, look, I can explain."

"Explain what? That you left and that you're the reason any of us is even in this hospital?" he guessed.

Shane squeezed me hand gently.

"_Stop, _Dad," I said, almost shaking. "M-Mom, Dad, we have something to tell you."

They both turned in my direction, waiting for an answer. I just couldn't bring myself to it.

Shane finally spoke up. "We're having a baby."

I waited for a reaction. My mom most likely took it the wrong way because she looked at me and said, "Don't you guys think you're a little young to be thinking about having children? It's also probably best if you wait until marriage."

"We weren't _planning_ on anything. Mom, I'm pregnant," I blurt out bravely.

My dad stood there, trying to analyze what I just said. "You're not joking, right?"

I burst into tears and squeezed hard on Shane's hand.

When he realized that we were telling the truth, he went on to say, "I thought you said you weren't going to have sex again until you were married."

"I'm not. I'm at four months." I gasped for air, wiping tears off my face.

My mom looked shocked. My dad held her in a hug, and they both took a seat on the couch.

"I'm sorry," I whispered, like I usually did whenever I did something bad.

"We can work through this. It's just… Why didn't you tell me earlier? I thought we had a better relationship than that," my mother said.

I wanted to roll my eyes and tell her how every time I tried to tell her something, she'd judge me before I could get my point across, but I didn't. I sat there and let the news sink into my parents' skin.

"We're keeping the baby," Shane said, filling them in.

"How are you guys going to take care of it? You know, it's not like taking care of a puppy. It's another human being's life you're responsible for," Mom said as if we didn't already know that.

"We're aware of that, Mrs. Torres," Shane replied.

The four of us kind of sat there uncomfortably as I was pulling myself together, and my mother was rubbing her temples. What more was there to say?

My parents learned to accept the news of my pregnancy, and Shane and I had to explain everything that had happened. I could tell my dad wanted to tear Shane's head off by the way he refused to make eye contact with him for screwing me over so many times. But at least he said he'd give him a chance.

They left to go tend to their businesses and stores after setting down some fresh fruit on the table.

"Was it just me or did you feel like your dad looked like wanted to kick me in the nuts?" Shane said as the door clicked closed.

I chuckled. "No dad wants to hear that a guy knocked up his daughter," I answered bluntly.

He laughed with me. "True. Hey, I'm staying with you overnight so I'm gonna head home to pick up some things."

"Okay."

"I love you," he said, kissing me gently on my forehead.

I smiled. "Love you, too."

It hadn't even been twenty minutes before my insides started acting up. I could feel breakfast seeping back up from my stomach.

I held my breath and tried to make it to the bathroom. It took me a second to get stable on the ground from the nausea, and I carefully used the tables and rails to guide me. Thank the Lord they had a bathroom in the hospital room.

Only five more steps before I reached the doorknob, Shane walked in from the other side of the room.

He must've seen me struggling since he set down all his stuff in the middle of the floor and came to be my aide. He hooked my right arm around his shoulder and supported my weight under my left arm.

Before he could even ask, I told him, "Curse morning sickness."

He lifted the toilet bowl cover up and helped me to my knees. I leaned over and started belching just as he pulled my hair back. I felt him rub my lower back.

"Here," he instructed, handing me a damp towel from the sink and flushing after I finished throwing up.

I brought it to my mouth and wiped. I was too weak to smile at him to thank him, so I sat all the way down against the cool, tiled wall.

"Let me just sit here for awhile," I sighed, breathing heavily.

He joined me. I leaned into the crook of his neck, relaxing finally.

"You okay?" he asked, brushing my hair away from my face while cradling me in his arms.

I nodded and put my hand over Shane's on my swollen belly.

"I'm so sorry you have to go through this," he whispered and then laid a kiss my cheek.

I shook my head. "Don't be sorry." I reached back and put my other hand on his neck.

He tried to kiss my lips, but I politely declined. "Wait." I pulled myself up to the sink with a little help from him and brushed my teeth thoroughly until my mouth didn't taste of fowl smells. I sat back down with him and kissed him full-on.

"Minty fresh," Shane commented, all smiley.

"You bet."

A nurse came by later as Shane was in the middle of playing me a song on his guitar, wheeling in a wheelchair. She looked no older than her early twenties.

"Your doctor arranged an ultrasound appointment that takes place in a few moments. Hop on," she said.

Shane put his guitar away and hopped up to assist the nurse in helping me into the wheelchair.

"I'm so jealous," he said as I was being pushed down the hallway.

I stuck my tongue out at him and poked fun.

"She could sit on your lap and I could push both of you," the nurse suggested.

Shane's face lit up.

She stopped the chair and Shane helped me stand up. He quickly slipped behind me onto the cushioned seat and slowly brought me into his lap.

"Are you comfortable?" he asked as he pulled his arms around me so he could hold me securely.

"Yep."

"Hold on, lovebirds," she said to us.

I gripped tightly on the armrests, readying myself. She unexpectedly raced down the hallway. It only took us a few seconds to reach our destination.

She rolled us into the room. Shane helped me stand up and hoisted me onto the gray cot.

"Were you allowed to do that?" I asked, grinning at the nurse.

"Probably not, but they can't fire me. Most of them work for my dad."

Shane and I shared a laugh before the obstetrician walked in.

"Hey, I'm Dr. Grant," she introduced herself. "You must be Mitchie."

I nodded.

"Is this the father?"

"Yes," Shane answered proudly.

I still couldn't believe how well and how fast he'd adjusted, but I wasn't about to complain. He was being a complete gentleman to me.

Dr. Grant went on to ask us the normal questions like the frequency of my morning sickness, if I had any odd symptoms, or even if Shane and I were currently sexually active.

Then, she took out a tube of lubricants from the drawer and asked me to lift up my gown. I had been smart enough to put on panties while Shane went to go get his stuff, so nothing was shown unnecessarily.

I nearly jumped when she squirted it on. It was freezing.

"Oh, sorry," she apologized and finished rubbing it on, and then reaching over for the ultrasound machine scanner.

She moved the screen so that both of us and Shane could see it.

She used her hand to press against my stomach to locate where the skull was. Then, she brought the scanner right on top of that area and held it there.

"Do you want to know the sex of the baby?" she asked.

I turned toward Shane and we nodded simultaneously.

"Okay, well," she said, pointing on the screen. "Here's the little head and arm. There are its legs. And between its legs, is a peek of the family jewels. It's a boy."

I didn't have time to feel awkward. I was really excited. I looked over to see Shane beaming.

**Okay, so I kinda ignored all the other characters and focused mainly on Shane and Mitchie for the most part. I wanted you guys to see that Shane really did change and that he was behind Mitchie a hundred and ten percent the whole time; he just didn't act upon his feelings.**


	15. Gift

**I felt like doing a time fast forward. She's eight months pregnant now. And it's a mini-chapter because it's really late and I won't be able to post anything for the next five days.**

_Three months later_

Mason came through the door hauling a big, brown box.

"Need help?" I asked, even though I was in no shape to get up and assist him. I continued eating my yogurt slowly and blissfully.

He shook his head and struggled to make it to the kitchen table.

"It's for the nephew," he said, referring to the baby. "Well, for the baby shower."

I sighed. "Just two more months and I will suffer no longer."

He made a face at me before taking out his keys and slicing the tape apart. "Looks like it's a present."

The baby shower was today. Although I was in no mood to greet people, I was excited to be getting the free gifts. Seeing them will probably make reality finally hit home.

I have been exhausted for the last few weeks from the baby kicking so often. We never got another ultrasound after finding out the gender, so we were going to go to for a checkup after the baby shower.

Shane has been living in my room for the past month so that he could help me around the house after hitting my third trimester. It was getting harder for me to simply use the bathroom, let alone walk down the stairs, especially since the doctor last said that I was gaining more weight than most pregnant women. I wanted to bust her head open, but then I realized that it was honestly just the way my belly _looked_ compared to the average baby bump.

He groggily walked downstairs. "Hey babe," he said, kissing my cheek. "My mom just _had_ to call at eight in the morning on a Saturday."

Shane still went to school everyday, while I hid at home for awhile. At this point, I'd barely be able to make it from class to class, so he hired me a tutor. The tutor got me so ahead in academics that I was set to graduate at his ceremony, which was a year early for me.

"What did she say?" I wondered. We decided to tell them face-to-face when they were back in town for a few days. They kind of just accepted that Shane would do something so stupid, but they were also quite proud of him for stepping up to the plate. What they didn't know was that it took him quite some time to get there.

"She asked how we were all doing," he said like he was holding a grudge almost. "She said they'll visit us soon."

I looked at him questioningly.

"Yeah, she said '_visit_'. She doesn't even consider my house their home anymore."

--

Shane drove Mason and me to his house for the baby shower. He offered to host it since my brothers probably wouldn't clean our living room even if my parents forced it upon them.

There was still two hours before it would actually start, giving us time to spark up his living room into something a little less modern and antique-esque. Well, it wasn't exactly time for '_us_' but more for '_everyone else_' to decorate. With my slow, delicate movements, Shane wouldn't even let me _try_ to help, not saying that I'd even be able to in the first place.

Nate and Remy would both meet up with us.

Speaking of Nate…I wasn't really sure what our relationship was anymore. After I excitedly told him about getting back together with Shane and explaining everything else, he kind of just backed off. Not only from showing his feelings toward me, but he practically backed out of my life. He still held the 'Best Friend' title, but it really hurt me to know that the fact I was with Shane was damaging him.

Shane lent me an arm to hold onto for support after helping me out of the car. I waddled into his house pushing my hands behind my back to keep my spine straight.

I made my way over to the couch and tried lying down until I found a decent position where I didn't feel like I was smothering the baby. No matter how I twisted my body, it just wasn't comfortable with the limited space.

Just then Nate walked though the front door with Remy right behind him, and they were holding hands.

"Are you guys…?" I asked, slowly trailing off as I continued to toss around.

Shane must've seen me struggling because walked over to me and scooped me up in his arms.

He used his foot to kick open the doors to his downstairs bedroom and gently laid me on his king-sized bed. "You can sleep for awhile while we put up decorations."

"You spoil me," I said teasingly.

He smiled. "It's my pleasure."

I just stared at the ceiling for a few minutes, holding onto my stomach.

Remy entered the room. "Hey Mitch," she greeted. "How's the baby doing?"

"He's softly killing me with his size," I said, only slightly joking. "So…"

"Nate and I—" she stopped herself, not knowing how the phrase it right.

"Shut up and just spill the details," I ordered, cutting to the chase.

"Okay, so since it's kind of awkward now between you two and you're always with Shane, he had nothing to do yesterday so he called me up and we met in the park. I was already sitting on the swing doing nothing when he showed up. He joined me in the swing next to me and we just started talking about nothing and everything. And it was pretty windy so my hair was like blowing all over the place and hitting him in the face, so I apologized and he was like '_No, no, I think your hair's really pretty_,' even though he thought I was saying sorry for it looking bad at that particular moment. Before you know it, we kissed and then it got a little cold so he put his jacket on my shoulders and it was just…_fantastic_," she said all in one breath.

She ended up sitting cross-legged on the bed beside me and was just absolutely beaming.

"That sounds great," I mumbled, lacking the energy for enthusiasm.

"You're not mad, are you?"

I looked over at her and smiled weakly. "Definitely not. I'm honestly really, really happy for both of you. I'm kind of just tired. I haven't slept peacefully in so long because the baby kicks so much. I don't even think it's supposed to kick this much."

"Oh, I'm sorry." She rubbed my belly. "Anyway I have to go make the room look baby-showerified and I think Nate wants to talk to you."

As she left, I found Nate shyly walking next to where my head was.

"Hey," he said, acting nervous. I could tell by the way he was viciously biting his lip.

"Hi."

It was silent for the two minutes I had my eyes closed, expecting him to say something. I opened them to check if he was still there. He was.

"You know, I don't remember the last time you've ever been shy to _me_. I've seen you do the whole lip-biting thing to countless reporters and some other peers, but never done it to me. I know it must feel weird with Shane around again and I wanted to thank you for being there all the times he wasn't, but I don't want things to be awkward between us," I murmured quietly.

"Me either. I just didn't know how to tell you about Remy and me. Don't take this the wrong way, but I think the whole time I thought I was crushing on you, I was actually interested in Remy," he explained.

"No, that's awesome!" I said, adding some liveliness into my voice.

"Really? You're okay with it?"

"Under the circumstances that you still consider us best friends," I negotiated even though I couldn't be happier.

"Done," he said, closing the deal and pecking me on the cheek.

He left me to my rest and closed the door behind him.

By the time I woke up, I found Shane staring down at me. "Ready, beautiful?"

"No, but I kind of have to get out there."

One by one, people were piling into the house. As I made my entrance into the room, everyone started clapping.

I just smiled.

We didn't really make invitations and instead just kind of told people to be there, and apparently most of the school got the news. I hadn't showed up in school in so long that I figured most of the kids came just to stare at my stomach in order to really believe that I was pregnant.

I was almost through with all the presents. The most embarrassing one so far was the suction cups for breast milk. I'd gotten everything from onesies to a diaper changing station.

"Thanks Greta," I said quickly after having to reread the card to remember her name. I'd never even seen her before and she brought me a twenty-five dollar Babies R Us gift card.

The last present was from Taylor and Jason.

Taylor came to sit beside me on the couch—which was the first gesture of sincerity from a guest so far—and encouraged me to open it. I didn't know why though, because it was sitting right in front of me and it wasn't like I was going to just skip theirs.

"I think she's gonna love it!" Taylor said enthusiastically to Jason as I leaned over to unravel the wrapping paper. It was flat so I assumed it was in paper form.

Surely enough it was a printed picture of a blue crib.

"It's a little bit too big to wrap up because it's assembled already when they deliver it, which is exactly what they're doing in two weeks. In time for the birth."

"Thanks so much!" I said, hugging Taylor then Jason tightly. I could only hug each of them so tight before I felt like I was squishing the baby.

"Help yourself to desserts, and thanks for coming!" Shane announced.

"We're not done with the presents," I heard a woman's voice call from behind a large group of gathered people.

Shane's mom and dad pushed through the crowd. "Surprise."

"Mom, Dad," Shane acknowledged. He was kind of neutral about seeing them.

"Mr. and Mrs. Gray!" I exclaimed enlightening Shane's greeting.

"We have one more present for the two of you," Jack, his dad, said.

Shane's mom put her arm through mine. "Every family needs a home. Part of having a family is staying together, and part of having a home is having space and privacy. Your room surely doesn't have enough space to raise a family in. Jack and I were thinking. We are rarely even at this house and we own a townhouse just thirty minutes away, and you two could really use the space and property. This is our gift, to you," she told me, holding her arm out to gesture at this room.

**So like I said I won't be able to post anything, but I **_**will**_** be able to read reviews. I almost had trouble writing this chapter because I wasn't feeling its energy as much, so feel free to leave a spontaneous review about anything you want to happen in this story.**

**ANONYMOUS REVIEWS ARE ALLOWED!!**


	16. Surprise

**In a review, someone mentioned that I initially said she was at eight months, which means she has one month left. I screwed up in the A/N and actually meant that she was seven months pregnant. Sorry if it caused any confusion! **_**Now**_**, she's eight months.**

"Can you hand me the Phillips screwdriver?" Shane asked.

I reached over to the nightstand and tossed it to him.

He began unscrewing the shelves of my bookcase. I had already packed all my clothes and necessities into boxes that Jake and Mason were helping me load into the moving van.

"I just can't believe you're leaving. You have to promise to call me every day to tell me about your day and how the baby is doing," my mother said at the doorway.

I nodded. "Sure, Mom. It's not like I'm moving to Mexico or something. It's only like twenty minutes away." I would've said '_You can visit'_ but I knew Shane would probably have a problem with that and I'd probably regret it when she actually did show up at our house unexpectedly. Don't get me wrong; my parents adored Shane and he respected them a lot. Sometimes they hovered, though, and that could be a little much for the both of us.

Shane eventually took apart the whole thing and stored them into a cardboard box.

"I think we're done here," he announced.

With the help of my chair, I pulled myself up from the ground and looked around my room. It suddenly looked really empty.

All my stuff was gone. The walls seemed lonely without the endless posters that once littered it. All my pictures were gently packed into another seemingly boring, labeled box.

Suddenly it didn't feel like my room anymore. It felt like—well, just a _room_. Just from taking a look at it, no one would be able to tell that I'd ever made my mark here. There was no mark to see.

I wasn't sure if I was ready to open up the next chapter in my life. Of course, I'd be forced to as soon as this baby arrived into the world.

I think I was more nervous about it than anything. It almost felt like a wakeup call. My childhood was over, and adulthood was just kicking in. I was only sixteen, yet I was planning to be a mother. You'd think that having a kid was the most nerve-wracking idea, but actually, it was the fact that I'd be living alone with Shane.

I wasn't sure of the permanence he had in my life _still_. He hasn't left my side since he promised he wouldn't, but either way, it wasn't like we were married or engaged. The thing permanently tying us together was this baby.

I walked through my front door and lingered on the porch for awhile. I took in a deep breath of this place. This would be what I called my childhood home. I can't believe I was moving out even before Jake was.

"Honey," my mom called after me. She caught up to me and held me in a long hug. "I can't believe my baby's growing up and having her own baby."

My dad came up behind her. "We're gonna miss you, Mitch."

My mother let go of me and leaned onto my dad for support. "I can't even cook breakfast for her anymore," she said, her voice cracking. Tears flew down her face.

"Aw Mom, don't cry."

She sobbed at everything, and I was beginning to think she passed that trait onto me. Lately I've cried at every little thing on TV. But then I realized that I had the excuse of being pregnant and having hormonal malfunctions.

I hugged them both and then took hopped into the truck.

Shane was already in the driver's seat trying to figure out what some of the buttons and controls were so he could take us to his house.

I looked out the window to see my parents waving and crying. I waved back, but after a few minutes of realizing that they hadn't stopped waving, I stopped and turned back to my seat.

We arrived at the house shortly.

After hours of watching my friends and brothers unpack, it suddenly kicked in that this was _our_ house. I'd be living here with Shane, with an added baby in about a month.

I was in charge of putting away clothes and memorabilia to spark up the room that Shane and I would be sharing. I even had to bargain with him just to be able to do this on my own. He claimed that I was responsible for two people now and he didn't want me to get tired, which was absolutely ridiculous because I wasn't about to let him put everything in the wrong place.

The last things I hung up were our graduation gowns. Our graduation ceremony was just around the corner.

My gown was a size larger than Shane's. Although that was kind of self-esteem lowering, it only reminded me how much things have changed since the beginning of the school year. I never thought that things would turn out quite like this.

I sat around on the bed, struggling yet again for a position where I was still decently comfortable, while the sun made its course to set, and then disappear into the horizon.

"Knock, knock," Shane said, announcing his presence. "Going to sleep?"

"I wouldn't be able to even if I tried," I answered, continuing to toss around.

He pulled up and pillow so he could lean against it, and he pulled me to his chest.

"Better?" he asked.

"A little."

He frowned. "I'm sorry."

"You know, I don't get why people think pregnancy is such a beautiful thing. Vomiting, back pains, and physical disability isn't all that glamorous."

He tilted my chin towards him and kissed me. "You know, I wish I could be the pregnant one just so you don't have to suffer so much."

"Aw, that's sweet, but I don't think of it as suffrage. It's just more reason for me to be excited for our son to get here."

Shane smiled and lifted up my shirt. He leaned down and pressed his lips to my belly. "I didn't know it was possible to love someone you haven't even met this much."

"I know how you feel," I said.

Shane reached for his guitar. "I think it's scientifically proven that if you play music to a baby who's still in the womb, the baby will most likely grow up to be a musician. Our son is _definitely_ going to be a musician."

I tilted my head sideways. "What if he doesn't want to be a musician? What if he wants to be an anesthesiologist? Would you stop him?"

Shane shrugged. "I'm not saying he strictly has to make music for a living because God knows how stressful that is, but I want him to have some influence that comes from music."

I nodded. "Sounds good to me. I'll love him the same no matter what he chooses in life."

"Same here. I love him so much already."

"Really? I bet I love him more."

He looked offended. "I don't think that's possible. Although you probably have that mother-child bonding thing going, it doesn't affect my undeniable love for him."

--

"Shane," I whined from the bed. It was the morning of our graduation.

"Yes?"

"Would you be so kind as to get me my graduation gown?"

He trotted towards me, and flicked it onto the bed. He had shaving cream all over his face and his hair was a complete mess.

He helped me off the bed and watched as I waddled into our master bathroom. I religiously brushed my teeth, fixed my hair, and made myself look a little less dead; I couldn't avoid it since I was barely getting any sleep at night.

I threw on the gown as best I could. As much as I stood in front of the mirror trying to tug at certain areas, I still looked depleted and my stomach looked bigger than ever. It looked bigger than most pregnant bellies around the end of the third trimester, and I am not just saying that. I've seen plenty of pictures and compared to them, my stomach is a giant.

I walked downstairs to a pleasant breakfast cooked by the one and only Shane Gray.

I felt out of place as soon as we stepped foot in the school, hand-in-hand. Not only did I not know anyone here because they weren't technically in my grade, I was also the one with the beach ball under her graduation gown, and paparazzi showed up to take more pictures of me as if I didn't feel self-conscious enough already.

I ignored my surroundings and focused solely on getting that diploma. I'd been working my ass off so many nights just to be able to stand in this line today, waiting for my name to be called out. I waved at Shane and Remy who were both much farther up.

I was just going stand here patiently until I get my certificate of achievement.

Of course, that plan was ruined as soon as my bladder reminded me of its presence.

Our principal had already begun calling out names and since my last name was near the lower end of the alphabet, I would have enough time to leave and come back.

I rushed to the bathroom in my waddle and did my thing. I was ordinarily washing my hands, lathering the soap all over. After I rinsed and dried my skin, I felt something inside me release. I looked down in between my legs to see the ground becoming wet and a fowl smell was rising to my nostrils.

_You've _got _to be shitting me._

I didn't have my phone on me so I walked out of the bathroom to find some help.

I held onto my stomach and called out, "Help! Help!"

But no one came.

I watched Nate run through the doors right then, looking rushed.

"I'm so sorry I'm late. Remy's going to kill me. Aren't you supposed to be in there?" he blurted out all at once.

My contractions hadn't started yet, but I still needed to tell myself to breathe from my nerves.

"I really _don't_ care. My water just broke," I said, trying not to hyperventilate.

"What?" Nate practically squeaked. "But you have one more month, don't you? Pregnancies last for nine months, not eight months. It's a month too early. It can't be. I mean, it's not like you—"

He often babbled when he was quietly panicking inside.

I grabbed his shirt and pulled it to my face. "_My water just broke_," I repeated.

"What do I do?!" he asked, completely bewildered.

"Get Shane. _Get_ Shane!"

I held my belly closer to me and took a seat on the bench outside the front office.

I felt my lower region burst into flames as my first strong contraction took place. I took the liberty to scream at the top of my lungs as the pain ripped through me.

"Hee hee whoo, hee hee whoo," I whispered to myself.

The doors to the auditorium slammed open to reveal a frantic Shane.

He scooped me up in his arms and carried me out to his car. Most of the paparazzi were smoking on the side of the building and jumped when they saw us.

Nate and Remy both got into the car as Shane laid me down in the back. Remy sat with me so I could lay my head on her lap.

Shane sped down the highway. The scary thing was that at a point, I wasn't sure whether I was more scared of us colliding with another car or even a pole, or having the baby.

"It's going to be fine," Remy said, stroking my hair.

We got to the hospital in no time, and the nurse was already wheeling me down to a hospital room in a wheelchair before I knew it. I made everyone but Shane and my mother sit outside in the waiting area.

I tried not to scream as I got another contraction.

A man walked in, dressed in the whole doctor uniform. "I'm Dr. Post and I'll be filling in for Dr. Mason today seeing as she's out of town." He snapped on some gloves and instructed me to put my legs up on two stands.

The whole room that consisted of my mother, my boyfriend, and a bunch of nurses could see my privates.

It would've been easier if I just had Dr. Mason, who was a _woman_ that I'd actually gown comfortable with. It was the most awkward thing I had ever experienced in my life as a strange man stuck his hand and felt my nether region.

"That must be one big baby," he commented, cocking his head to the side while staring at my belly. He felt a little farther and removed his hand. "You're at about two centimeters," he informed Shane and me. He left after saying he'd come back and check on me shortly.

The pain was only getting worse from here, but they wouldn't let me get my epidural until I was at least five centimeters dilated.

"I've never been in so much agony before in my life," I weakly mumbled to Shane.

"I know and I'm sorry," he replied, brushing back the hair that was stuck to my face. "I love you."

I wasn't in any mood to be loving or even kind for that matter, so I just ignored what he said and winced as the next episode of pain crashed over me.

For what seemed like an eternity to me, Dr. Post finally returned thirty minutes later. He reached down again to feel.

"Wow, you're already at seven centimeters," he said, smiling brightly.

I glared at him. "You mean to tell me that I could've gotten my epidural sooner?!" I screamed.

"The nurse is on that right now. Calm down," he said.

Obviously he hasn't had much practice with this process because even if I wasn't pregnant, I would know not to tell a woman who was in labor to "_calm down_".

I was about to raise my fist but decided it would take too much energy.

As soon as they connected my tube to the epidural, the pain started melt away little by little. Yet, I could still feel a lot since they could only give me a light drug.

The moment Dr. Post told me I was fully dilated, I was instructed to push.

I could feel the stretching and mostly everything. If it were up to me, I wouldn't even know that I already had my epidural.

"Come on, a big push this time," Dr. Post encouraged. "The head is already out."

Shane was holding my hand saying comforting words to me while also paying attention to the baby.

I started to push, but couldn't gather the strength. "I'm too weak. It's too hard."

"You can do it," the doc said.

"Don't worry. It's gonna be fine," Shane assured me.

That pushed me over the edge. "Let's see how determined you are the next time _you_ have to squeeze a bowling ball out your vagina!" I yelled in his face.

He looked absolutely horrified, but gathered himself enough to shake it off and reply with, "I love you. Think of the beautiful baby boy we're going home with."

I gave a long and hard push and the baby slipped right out of me. I heard his first cry and immediately fell even more in love with him. I got a glance at my son as they lifted him up. The sparkle and innocence in his eyes was like none other I had ever seen.

The doctor cleaned him up and gave Shane the honors of snipping the umbilical cord.

"We just need for the placenta to come now," Dr. Post said.

I suddenly felt overwhelmed to continue pushing. I continued applying pressure down there as much as my body was telling me was necessary.

"Got it," he announced, reaching _in._ He paused for a moment with a confused look plastered all over his face. He looked at my lower area and his eyes widened. "There's a foot."

I was shocked along with Shane.

"_What?"_

He first pulled out a disgusting-looking sponge-like thing, but tossed it aside and looked closer into my privates. He felt a little more until his eyes lightened up. "You're having twins."


	17. Babies

**Haha did some of you really see that coming? 'Cause actually, when I was writing the chapter in the beginning, I was going to make her just have a very chubby baby, but then I came up with that idea at the very last minute xD**

"This isn't good," Dr. Post mumbled. I was already a wreck balancing the thought that I was having not one, but _two_ babies; I didn't need any more ground-breaking news.

"What? What's wrong? Is everything going to be okay?" a nervous Shane asked.

"Don't panic, but uhh, this could be very dangerous. It's called a breech birth when the baby's bottom comes out before the head."

"_Don't panic?!"_ he screeched back.

"There are four different types of breech births: frank, footling, complete, and kneeling. This is a footling breech we're dealing with since its foot came out first. Now, it's rather common for a multiple pregnancy and also when it's a premature birth. Those are both factors today, so—"

Shane looked entirely irritated. "Could you stop telling me about it and just do what you need to do? If it's so dangerous, you _shouldn't_ be wasting time!" he threatened.

As for me, I was still telling myself not to completely lose it after just finding out that there's another baby in me that I didn't know about, not to mention that the foot came out first and it's in danger, all while I'm in the worst pain I have ever experienced in my entire life. I was still having contractions, so as another made its course through my body, I squeezed Shane's hand as hard as the pain felt.

Let's just say he almost took a dive for the floor.

The doctor took a deep breath and told the nurses what to do. "We're going to need to turn the fetus so that one of its hips comes out first."

They brought in all kinds of metal tools and started standing around the bed, silently motioning to each other what to do.

Shane held my hand tightly. "It's going to be okay," he assured me.

I nodded, hoping with all my might that he was right.

I looked down in between my legs as Doctor Post started maneuvering the leg that was sticking out of me. Just as he twisted it, a nurse lent a hand to help him.

"We almost got it. Come on little baby," he said.

He gave the foot another light push sideways.

He and the nurse almost simultaneously jumped back.

"The second umbilical cord could be compressed right now. We can't risk letting the fetus go on without oxygen," he announced to everyone in the room. They all began shuffling around, moving things out of the way to the door and adjusting the height of my bed.

"What's going on?" Shane had to nerve to ask. I—on the other hand—already had the instinct that it wasn't great news.

"She's going to need a Caesarean section in order to ensure the baby doesn't suffer brain loss."

I saw this coming; I was only waiting for the moment for the doctor to make it official. I look over and saw Shane choke on his spit a little bit.

"Brain loss? C-Section?" he choked out.

They started wheeling the bed to out the door and down the hall to the operation room. On the way, they threw scrubs and a smock to Shane and instructed him to put them on.

I was moved onto the operating table. They put up sheets to make a curtain so that I couldn't see the lower half of my body. Shane sat by me.

A nurse came by to drug me up so that I couldn't even feel my legs.

The lights began to seem fuzzy to me after awhile, and I felt really dizzy, but I could still manage to hold a conversation with Shane.

"Are you worried?" I asked with my eyes closed, slightly slurring my words.

"More than you can imagine. I'm not sure what to feel right now. I wasn't expecting to bring home two babies; I can't bear seeing you in such agony; the baby we didn't even know existed until moments ago is in danger of brain loss; the doctor we got stuck with is such a douche; and I really want to see our son right now," he answered honestly.

I chuckled a little at some of his choice of words. "I want to see our son, too. Are you happy that they're pulling a second baby out of me right now?"

"Are you asking if I'm happy that their hands are in your junk, or if I'm happy that in any case you weren't all drugged up, you'd be screaming at the top of your lungs in pain, _or_—"

"Really? There's a third choice?" I asked sarcastically, quietly laughing to myself about his first assumption.

"_Or_," he continued, ignoring my comment, "if you're asking whether or not I'm happy about the news of our second-born."

"That would be the one."

He thought for a moment before answering. "Honestly, yes, I am. I'd rather have my second child by surprise _this _way, than to have to see you go through this again."

I looked at him. "You were already planning that we'd have another kid?"

He grinned. "I can't imagine having kids with anyone else…"

"That's really sweet," I said, smiling.

He reached for my hand. "I love you. I'm _in _love with you, and it's unbelievably hard to see you like this."

"I can't even feel my legs right now, so it's all good."

He shrugged. "How the heck could they not know that there was another baby inside you?"

"Beats me. I can't believe I'm a mom—to _two_ babies. How are you with the idea of parenthood?" I asked.

"I'm scared shitless about being a father. I heard babies don't even come with manuals!" he joked.

I laughed. "We'll figure it out. We have each other."

"I know. I can't wait to finally meet our kids. It still sounds so weird saying the plural."

Just as I opened my mouth to talk I heard a shrill cry.

I saw the nurse wipe off the gunk off my little baby, suction everything out of its nose and ears, and wrap it up in a soft, baby blanket.

She handed the little bundle of joy to me.

"You have a healthy baby girl."

Her eyes were tightly shut. I held her close to my chest.

I looked up at Shane hovering over us. "She definitely has your nose."

"And your lips," he replied.

"You want to hold her?"

He nodded. I gently passed her into his arms. I've never seen him be so careful with anything before.

"Hi baby girl," Shane whispered to her. "I'm your daddy. We found out you were coming just as you were being born, but I can already say I love you."

I felt a tear roll down my face. It was a Kodak moment.

I slowly drifted off into sleep, letting the drug overpower me.

A woke up a few hours later back in the hospital room. I felt an undeniably sharp stinging from my belly button down, but I couldn't really see anything because it was wrapped up in gauze and bandages. I could dismiss the pain, though, after realizing the presence of a baby in each of Shane's arms as he rocked back and forth on the rocking chair.

He looked up at me. "You're awake."

"Yep," I mumbled weakly.

Shane stood up, still holding them both, and managed to be able to lie down beside me on the bed.

He handed me our son. I stared at him in awe.

"He's beautiful. They both are," I commented. "I can definitely see you in him."

The nurse came in just then holding the birth certificates. "I know you asked for more time on deciding names for the baby girl, but what about names for the baby boy?" she asked.

Shane and I looked at each other. I nodded for him to answer her.

"Ryan Shane Nathan Gray."

--

It had been three days since their birth, but we were still at the hospital so that the doctor could check up on our babies to make sure they were developing correctly, seeing that they were born a month early.

My obstetrician told me that she missed the second baby because she was hidden underneath Ryan.

My parents had already met both the babies and were back at home, continuing their lives with their work.

Remy, Nate, Taylor, Jason, Jake, and Mason were all coming to visit today.

It was still excruciatingly painful to stand up with the staples in my stomach, so I'd just have to settle with leaning against an elevated bed frame.

"Knock, knock," Jake called out, holding filled plastic bags. The other five wandered in behind him.

"Mitchie! I want to see the babies!" Remy exclaimed, dropping her purse and running to my bedside.

I nodded toward Shane to indicate he was holding them.

"What are their names?" Nate chimed in. "I don't remember you guys ever doing baby name research."

I took the liberty to answer, having discussed everything with Shane earlier. "Our son is Ryan Shane Nathan Gray. Yeah, he has too middle names."

Nate stood still in his tracks. "Dude, seriously?" he asked Shane.

Shane smiled.

"That's awesome. Thanks."

I continued. "And our daughter's name is Bethany Emma Gray."

"Also, would you four like to be our babies' godparents? Since there are two kids, there should be a pair of godparents for each, but we didn't want to basically assign you babie," Shane said to Taylor, Jason, Nate, and Remy.

"I'd love to!" Taylor shouted in excitement while casually and subconsciously spinning a ring on her left hand. "As my first act, taking the role as godmother, I would like to present them with awesome bibs."

She whipped out two bibs, one in pink and one in blue. She gave the blue one to Ryan and the pink one to Bethany. They both read "_My parents are cooler than yours," _and underneath that it said _"I am Daddy's little rock star. _

"This is totally awesome and unexpected," Jason said.

"Tell me about it. Now I have a nephew _and_ a niece!" Jake said a little too animatedly. He was straying as far away from Remy as it could. They were probably still in the awkward stage after their breakup even though it's been months.

"Any plans for the future yet?" Mason asked.

"We're going to let them be whoever they want to be, but music is definitely going to be a big part of their lives," Shane answered.

"I'm going to spoil them, and I hope you know that. Oh, and I call first dibs on teaching them guitar!" Nate said.

I knew Shane was going to have a problem with this, but I saw him twitch his lip a little and let it go.

They stayed for the entire day, but it was really awkward because Jake and Remy kept their distance, but Nate was best friends with him and was going out with Remy now. Jason and Taylor also stayed apart, but it didn't seem like it was because of a fight, but more like they were keeping something from the rest of us.

"What's up?" I asked when Taylor wandered over to my bed.

"What do you mean?"

"Well uh—you're kinda avoiding Jason. And it's a avoiding as if you didn't want to give something away."

She looked over at him and just as he turned to catch her glimpse, she nodded.

"What was that?" I pressed.

"Um, everyone," Jason announced out loud, "Taylor and I have some news."

Taylor walked up to him and intertwined her fingers in his.

I could tell that Jason was trying to get it out of himself, but he couldn't, so everybody just sort of stood around and stared.

Taylor used her thumb to play with that ring again on her left hand. She turned it so that you could see a fat diamond in the center of it.

"He asked me to marry him."

**Haha do you like the names? Oh, and follow me on Twitter! The link is on my profile page. Instead of 'Follow Me', I put 'Stalk Me' :). Have a nice day.**


	18. Questions

**School started again. Kill me. Please.**

**(Six Months Later)**

I was sitting on the bed, playing with Beth's hair while Shane stood up with Ryan in his arms and picked up his phone.

"Hello?"

The other line must've been talking a lot because Shane kind of just stood there, only paying attention to our son.

"Uh, well, I'm not sure. I'll get back to you, though, all right?" He hung up.

"What was that about?" I asked.

"People Magazine wants us to do a photo shoot with our kids and then interview us, but I don't know if I want to show them off to the world yet," he answered, his overprotective fatherliness kicking in.

"Yeah, but we've kind of been on the DL for half a year now. We have avoided countless interviews and it wouldn't hurt to let them into our lives just a little bit. I mean, your fans are already devastated after you cancelled two world tours."

He shrugged. "Family comes first. But, I guess you have a point there."

"Well how much are they offering?"

Shane looked away, acting a little shy. "Seven-hundred and fifty," he softly said.

"That's not bad for only like an hour or two. It's more than middle-class people get paid."

"I meant seven-hundred and fifty thousand."

My eyes widened.

"Yeah, so, should I call them back?"

I nodded. Seven hundred and fifty thousand doesn't just fall from trees. Well, not nowadays, however, since Shane is fully committed to helping me raise our kids for now.

--

"I haven't done many of these interview things. Do you need to dress up for the photo shoot or something?" I asked Shane just as we were getting ready to start our day. We were going to stop by the People Magazine headquarters in about an hour.

Shane shook his head. "They have clothes picked out for everyone."

"Any tips on interviewing?"

"Be honest, but don't say anything that could possibly be taken the wrong way. Magazines have a way of twisting words."

I nodded. We both got dressed quickly before we went into the twins' bedroom.

Shane and I took our turns to kiss both of them on the forehead.

He went ahead and started setting up the diaper station as I picked Ryan up and brought him over also. Shane started cradling Beth.

After I changed Ryan's diaper and tossed the gross one away, we switched babies and Shane started to dress Ryan. Then, after I changed Beth's diaper, I began dressing her as Shane went elsewhere; we thought it would be fair that I got to dress our daughter and he got to dress our son. It seemed more…normal. Although, I could already tell that our future was far from that.

It was a simple routine, really. It just went by way faster than if I did it alone. Even if he had to sacrifice two tours and delay the release of his album, it was worth it because he got to be there for all the important moments.

As I finished dressing Beth, Shane walked downstairs with Ryan to start mixing some formula for the two of them as well as getting out some baby food.

We fed them and started to get in the car.

"Do we have everything?" Shane asked for the last time.

"Babe, that's like the fiftieth time you've asked. Yes, I do."

He looked at me innocently and kissed me on the forehead. "Just making sure."

The car ride wasn't that long. It was only downtown Los Angeles.

We walked into the building and the lady at the front desk urgently ushered us into a room across the lobby. Everything went very quickly.

They arranged us in different ways, directing us to do different poses while they took picture after picture. I felt insecure, like the bright flash would blind my precious kids.

But luckily everything went smoothly. We were then told to sit on two stools while a middle-aged woman walked up to Shane and me and shook our hands.

"It's such an honor to have you here!" she exclaimed as two men who seemed like the kind of people who'd "run the show" in this building reached for Ryan who was in Shane's arms and Beth who was in mine.

I reluctantly let them take our children and waited anxiously for the interviewer to straighten out her papers and turn on her tape recorder.

"So," she started, "my name is Lisa. How have you guys been?"

"Pretty good, actually. You?" Shane replied.

"I'm fine, thanks for asking."

It was basically just small talk for the first few minutes. Pointless questions, nothing quite worth mentioning. Then, she straightened up in her chair and took some papers out of the folder she was holding.

"Why didn't you let anyone know that you were pregnant until you actually blew up like a balloon?"

I raised an eyebrow, about to say something harsh before Shane rested his hand on my lap. "Well, I'm young. After all the teen pregnancies that have been featured in magazines and TV shows, I felt like I would just be adding to the statistics. I was pretty lucky to have Shane around for the most part, and I didn't want to let girls all over the nation and world think that it's some fantasy. It's quite the opposite."

She turned her head sideways. "What do you mean, 'for the most part'?"

I coughed to get some phlegm out of my throat, buying myself some time to answer that question in a well-mannered way. "It was tough for us to adjust to this. It definitely took time before we were both on the same page."

Lisa nodded and stuck her pen behind her ear. "How's your life now?"

"It's pretty great, actually. Everything's finally settling down, and Shane helps a lot. If we didn't have each other there's no way we'd be able to accomplish just simply living day to day," I answered.

"Do you think you're sending the wrong message to teens by saying that you have a fantastic life now?"

I finally understood what Shane meant by the manipulative twisting of words. "No, no of course not. Like I said before, it's _not_ a fairytale. My life has changed so much, but I was lucky."

"Would you say your life has changed positively or negatively?"

"Well, positively I guess. I can't imagine my life without my kids," I said.

"So we're back to the whole sending the wrong message thing," she pressed.

Shane look aggravated. "Just move on already, woman."

She nodded nervously, obviously intimidated by the great Shane Gray, and shuffled her papers a little before starting with a new question. "How did it happen?"

"I think we all know _how_ it happened," Shane answered briefly.

I sighed. "We were at this party, and I drank punch that someone had spiked. Of course, I wasn't aware of this, but it was one night."

Lisa sat there, jotting a few things down and then continuing. "So we noticed that there was a brief period of time that you just disappeared. Where did you go?" she asked Shane.

He shrugged. "I needed to get away and think for a little while."

"Where'd you go?"

"Away."

"Do _you_ know where he went?" Lisa asked me.

I shrugged. "Not really."

Shane grunted slightly, not in the mood to answer it, but also unwilling to hear Lisa just ask the same question again. "I went to Panama City. To my cousin's house."

"For an entire month?"

"It was three weeks."

"Haven't you mentioned in a previous interview that you have an ex-girlfriend down there?"

He looked at me, fidgeting in his seat. "Yeah, she's roommates with my girl cousin, but nothing happened. I think Mitchie would trust me more than that."

"She just said she didn't know where you went. What did you do there?" she kept pressing.

Shane sighed again.

I turned to him and looked at him daringly. "Answer the question."

"I just did some surfing and relaxed. That's it."

"Well how could you just leave Mitchie behind without telling her where you were going?" she went on.

"I told her I was leaving so I could think for a while, but she never stopped me. I didn't think she cared much about where I went or what could happen to me."

I stared at him more intensely. "Are you kidding me? When you said you needed to think I thought maybe you'd leave for a day or two, a week at the most. But three weeks? You never even called."

He started rubbing his temple with his right hand. "This is why I initially turned down the offer to come. I knew it was going to bring back the past that we don't need to be reminded of." He turned to Lisa and began to stand up. "With all due respect, you can't treat us like criminals in interrogation rooms. We have lives, and we don't need you to screw it up for us. Celebrities come here to give the public a glimpse into our lives. You don't have to keep pressing for answers that don't necessarily have to be announced to the world."

I realized he was right and I followed him as he stormed off to find the guys that were responsible for Beth and Ryan.

He was speeding down the hallway as he reached for my hand. "I know some of that was questionable, but you trust me right?"

I nodded. "With my life. And our children's."

"Then trust me when I tell you that nothing happened in Panama City. I really am sorry about leaving, and I've already apologized and realized that I was being a douche. I love you," he said, out of breath.

"I know."

We claimed our kids back and left the place. We were still getting paid, but that didn't matter as much anymore.

Shane and I were planning to go out to eat that night with just the two of us, so we had to drop Beth and Ryan off at their grandparents, also my parents. It still felt so weird calling them grandparents.

As soon as we were children-less, we raced to the nearest Italian restaurant. Peace and serenity at last.

Shane parked the car and rushed out to open my door for me.

"Why thank you, kind sir," I said teasingly.

My hand slid into his as we made it into the restaurant and got ourselves a table.

I ordered a fettucine alfredo while he decided to stick with the normal spaghetti.

Dinner went by fast and before I knew it, it was already seven o'clock.

"I was thinking—" Shane began to say.

I looked up from my chocolate mousse cake, expecting him to finish his sentence.

"Never mind," he said quickly.

"No really, what?" I asked.

He let out a breath. "Well, since we're in this committed relationship…at least I hope you're committed because I know I am."

"Are you seriously asking me that?"

"Okay, so we're both on the same page. Since we already have kids and it really doesn't make a big difference to the rest of the world, I was thinking that maybe we could, um, uhh…" he said, beginning to have to force out his words.

"Have sex?"

His eyes widened. "Talk about being blunt."

I just looked at him, not really surprised by what he was asking.

"So…" he continued.

"Sure," I answered, knowing the question before it was asked. "I don't see what the big deal is."

"Okay, then. Tonight? I'm pretty sure your parents would love to keep the babies overnight."

I shrugged and then chuckled.

"What?" he asked.

"It's just that..." I thought of a way to phrase it nicely, "I was about to ask you soon."

--

We got back to our house, and we were standing right outside the front door, making out.

"I. Love. You. So much," he said in between kisses.

"I love you, too."

We made our way into our bedroom and starting pulling at each other's clothing. One moment leading to a next, it didn't take long for me to forget how to breathe.

**I know this took like a billion years to get posted. It's because of school. I have so much work. To give myself some leeway before having to get the next chapter up, let's have the goal of 220 reviews. I really need the support because the homework is first on my priority list, but sometimes I have to choose between school and my personal writing. (:**


	19. First Kiss

**Thanks for the reviews! Sorry for not updating in so long. You wouldn't believe how busy I've been.**

My eyes fluttered open, squinting from the broad daylight. I felt warmth from Shane's body heat. My back was against his bare chest and his arms covered me.

I looked down and realized how awkward it felt to be completely naked in a guy's arms. But at the same time, I realized that this felt like home. There was no one I'd rather be spending my life with.

I leaned my head back and met his eyes.

"Hey baby," he whispered.

I smiled at the sound of that. "Last night was…wow. We used a condom, too."

He grinned. "I love you, you know that?"

"You might've mentioned it a few times," I joked.

"Well, let me just remind you. I love you so much and you're perfect. I could never deserve someone as great as you, and I love that you love me too."

"What makes you so sure I love you too?"

He pouted like a little kid who missed the ice cream truck.

"Just kidding. I love you more than you can comprehend," I said.

He gently kissed me on the lips and cupped his hand around my cheek. "Oh, I think you have it backwards."

I shook my head and gathered the sheets around my body. "Don't be so sure."

Shane already had his boxers on and he went on to go make some breakfast for us. I wrapped myself in the white fabric and got off the bed. I quickly shuffled to the bathroom and locked the door behind me.

I looked into the mirror and looked at myself, sort of in an analytical way. I felt like I just lost my virginity all over again, except this time, I was completely sober and I knew what I was getting myself into.

I walked back into the bedroom, pulled on one of Shane's t-shirts, and walked downstairs. I squinted from the broad daylight in our kitchen.

"Shane Gray's famous scrambled eggs for the miss?" he asked.

I nodded, trying to ignore the fact that I was still being called _miss._ We've been together for about three years, and we've gone through so much and we have two kids. I mean, I'm only seventeen and he's only nineteen, but I wish we'd have something set in stone to show everyone that we are going to face the world, and we're going to do it together.

I took a seat on the sofa and turned the TV up. I flipped it to MTV, and they were playing concert footage of Connect Three.

"Look it's you," I told Shane.

At the bottom of the screen, text flew out: _World Tour has been postponed. New dates soon to come._

"Hey, are you still putting off the tour?" I asked.

"Well, yeah. That and the fact that Jason conveniently decided to earn his bachelor's degree online and Nate is trying hard to graduate, after all the days of school he's missed for the band."

"Yeah, education's important."

Shane walked over and set a plate on the coffee table in front of me. He slid the eggs off the pan and laid a fork on top.

"I know I never really asked you this, but what do you what to be? Like, for your career," he said, sitting down beside me.

"I think I still want to stay with singing, but I don't know. I can't handle the busy schedule with two babies now."

"I'm handling it okay. I think you can do it, too," he encouraged.

"Thanks. No offense, but you already have a career. It takes the hardest work to get to where you are, and now that you've been successful, _you're_ the one who tells other people when you can work. It's not as hard whereas I'm trying to get there," I explained.

"Oh. Well I think you have a very good chance to get where you want to be. But haven't you thought about college? You could get a normal job, you know."

I thought about it for a moment. "I honestly never put too much thought into going to college. I was too tied up in the fact that I was actually pregnant. But I don't think I need or want a job. I have two kids to take care of for the next possibly eighteen years, and we're not exactly a family who works paycheck to paycheck."

He shook his head. "No, money definitely isn't an issue for us, but I'm pretty sure you'll get bored sometimes. You sound like you're going to raise the kids yourself. You have me, you know."

I kissed him on the cheek. "Of course I know. But you have to admit, when you start music stuff up again, your life is going to be pretty hectic."

"Yeah, I know. I don't think I want to expose Ryan and Beth to the media anytime soon, either. I want to give them the best, normal life that I possibly can."

"Me too. But you have a big name and image, so it's going to be difficult."

He pouted. "Stupid image. I'm going to have to change it. I'm going to be a decent role model for my kids. People associate me with alcohol and parties and strippers, but you know yourself that I'm not like that. I wish the media would just give it a rest."

"We all wish for things we can't have."

I picked up the laptop that was sitting on the table and checked my email.

"One new message from—_Stephen Roy_?" I read aloud, my eyes going wide.

"That names sounds fami—is that…?"

"Yeah."

"_The _Stephen?"

I nodded.

**-FLASHBACK-**

Nate had just introduced me to his band mates about a month ago, but today, I followed Nate so his rehearsal. I sat down in a chair across the room from where they were practicing so I wouldn't really be intruding.

After sitting there for a while, I looked up at them and smiled a little at Nate, and then at Shane, the lead singer. Shane Gray had a pretty bad reputation. Well, not so much _bad_ as much as _badass._ It's common knowledge that he was a player, and he went through girls like chewing gum. He's associated with partying all night long and then passing out at random locations, and for his jerk-like qualities. He didn't seem that wild in person, though, but I guess I just haven't seen that side of him yet.

I'd already become friends with him. We often have long text conversations till late hours at night, and he never fails to make me laugh. He seemed normal enough, and I was ready at any given moment for the rudeness to fly out of him. It never did.

My cell phone beeped. I reached deep into my pocket and pulled out my phone. It was a new text message from my best friend, Remy:

_Hey dudeee. Um, well, idk how 2 tell u this, but stephens at the mall w/ this girl & it seems like they have something going on._

I replied back quickly:

_R u sure it was stephen? Maybe it was some other guy. He promised me he'd never cheat on me again._

Before I could blink, I got another message in my inbox:

_Im positive it was him. Im with rachel. She swears its him too._

I didn't feel like replying to it, so I just went ahead and texted Stephen himself. He has been my on-again off-again boyfriend for six months now. I saw him kissing another girl about two months ago and we broke up, but then we got back together again when he promised he wouldn't do it again. He's done countless things to make me mad, but I've always thought of it as sacrifice for love.

_Hey, whatcha doing? _I sent to Stephen.

_Sitting at home, thinking abt u. U?_

_O nothing. I thought u were at the mall._

_Where'd u get tht idea?_

_Oh idk. Nvm. Im at a connect 3 band rehearsal. Just bored._

_With tht guy?_

"_tht guy" happens to be my best friend since forever ago. Ur srsly not jealous, r u?_

_Whatever. I'll talk to you l8r._

I get irritated pretty quickly, so I called him.

"Hey, what's up dude?" he answered. It was really noisy in the background, and I don't think he's ever called me 'dude' before.

"Where are you?"

"Oh, I'm at home. That's just the TV."

I heard some girl calling his name in the background so I just hung up on him. I wanted to break my phone right then and there, but then I realized it probably wasn't worth it.

A silent tear fell down my face. I quickly brushed it away with the back of my hand before anyone could see it, and grabbed my purse so I could get my lunch.

I ate quietly, staring at the floor, trying to blank my mind from any bad thoughts. I ripped off a chunk of my apple with my teeth.

I jumped when someone tapped me on the shoulder from behind. I turned around to find the very Shane Gray.

I cleared my throat a little. "Hi."

"Hello there," he replied.

I didn't talk back. I had nothing interesting to say, anyway.

"Are you okay?" he asked.

"Why wouldn't I be?"

"Well, you were crying… And angry."

I looked at him, puzzled. "What?"

"Your makeup is all smudged and if your apple had feelings, it would be plotting your murder. The look is pretty familiar. It's like the same scenario every time I break up with a girl because I have to travel all the time."

"Oh." Well that's awkward. And embarrassing.

"So what's wrong?"

I shrugged. Why would he care? He has other things to do: interviews, photos shoots, band rehearsal… For goodness sake, he could even be rescuing a cat from a tree for all the media cares. "I don't want to talk about it," I mumbled.

"Then don't talk." He sat down in the chair beside me and put his arm around my shoulder.

I bit my lip and thought about it for a second. I barely know this guy. We've only talked through text, and that's cheating because you get a few extra seconds or minutes to think about what you want to say. I sighed and handed him my phone.

I could tell he was reading the whole chain of messages I had with Remy.

"Stephen…like, your boyfriend, Stephen?"

I nodded my head slowly.

"Did you talk to him?"

I moved my head up and down.

"Did he admit to two-timing you?"

I shook my head and sighed. "I know you're just trying to be friendly, but it's really no big deal."

He ignored what I said. "Do you trust him?"

I didn't need any head movement for this one. "No."

"Then why are you still with him?" he asked sincerely.

I took a deep breath. "That's a good question, actually. I love him. It's hard to just let someone go like that, you know?"

Shane chuckled a little to himself. "Yes, I know the feeling."

"Why is it funny?" I asked.

"Why is what funny?"

"You just laughed when I said that it's hard to let a loved one go."

"I've been in your shoes before. But it's usually because I always have to let go before I even get the chance to hold on."

"Oh, I'm sorry."

"No, don't be sorry. I feel like a fool about it anyways. All the girls were only interested in my fame."

I looked down, unsure what to say to that.

"Why do you keep letting him walk all over you?" he thought out loud after we both didn't say anything for awhile.

I shrugged. "It doesn't really hurt anymore. It stings for a good twenty minutes, and then it fades away and the pain subsides. I pretty much expect it."

He slowly shook his head.

"What?" I wondered.

"I don't know Stephen and he doesn't know me, but boy would I like to hit him for you. You deserve so much better than that, Mitchie. I've only known you for a short while, but I think I'm falling for you already. You don't deserve to put up with the shit he's pulling."

I smiled and melted a little on the inside. "You really think so?"

"I don't lie."

As soon as he said that, I mentally smacked myself in the head. Of course he'd lie! I've read all the articles on his life. He was probably just saying what he did to get me to break up with my boyfriend and go out with him or something.

I looked him in the eyes. "How many times have you tried that with other girls?"

"Tried what?"

"The whole 'you deserve much better than that' thing. The guy I love might be unintentionally hurting me sometimes, but he doesn't go around hitting on every heartbroken girl he can find."

He laughed out loud. "I was trying to be nice, and that's what you say? And did you say _unintentionally hurting _you? You're funny."

I rolled my eyes and shrugged his arm off me. I grabbed my phone from him and crossed my arms.

"Just for the record, I meant what I said. You don't deserve to be cheated on. No girl does."

"Ha, good one. I'm sure you've done it a billion times, though, haven't you? All tabloids have some truth within."

He leaned away from me a little bit. "You would think Nate would tell you all this… But I guess not. You've been talking to me for what? A month? And this whole time you still think that I'm some jerk the media makes me out to be?"

I bit my lip again. "Sorry. I didn't mean to assume. But there has to be some reason why they would say all that stuff about your partying."

"I've only been in love once in my life. I know what you feel like right now because I've been in your shoes. Her name was Melissa and we were really close. She never told me when her family had troubles with their bills and stuff, so I was never able to financially help them out even though I could. Well after I fell head over heels for her, whenever I asked her where she wanted to go for a date, she chose the club. So I just went along with it, not making much of what she was thinking. And a few months later I found out she was telling all my secrets and she was using our private pictures for money from magazine companies. It's not like I found out until awhile later because I don't read gossip magazines or websites and neither do my friends. I had to cut off my relationship with Melissa as soon as I found out and since then, my life hasn't exactly been on the right tracks. I mean, everything started out from my first trip to the club, and it's hard to change people's minds right after I was smacked in the face by someone I thought I could trust. I'm not a jerk, but that's why they come up with the ridiculous stuff."

"Oh. That sucks." What else could I say?

"When I said I'm falling for you, it's the same feeling I got from Melissa. Except I'm pretty sure I can trust you, because you're going through the same thing I don't wanna experience ever again."

"You said 'I _think _I'm falling for you'."

"Well, I _know_ I wouldn't hurt you like Stephen obviously has. He's done enough damage. Let him go. Move on. Preferably with me, though, you know…" He grinned brightly.

I chuckled.

"I really like your laugh," he commented.

I could feel my cheeks burn up as I turned away. He tapped me on my shoulder just like he did earlier, except this time when I turned back, I found his lips awaiting mine.

I just took one look into his eyes, and for once in my life, I felt _safe._

From then on, I could count on him to be there by my side. And I broke up with Stephen as soon as I could. It was the best decision I'd ever made because it didn't even hurt him a bit.

**-END OF FLASHBACK-**

**Thanks for reading! Don't forget to review:) I felt bad for all those who reviewed so I tried typing this every time I got the chance. I didn't have many chances, so that's why it came out so late. I love you ALL and I hope you stick with my story. UNTIL NEXT TIME, tell me what you thought of their first kiss!**


	20. AUTHOR'S NOTE!

**Author's Note-**

**Hey guys. Most of you probably forgot that this story existed, because fact of the matter is, I kind of did, too. It's not that I've given up on writing or Smitchie or any of this FanFiction stuff. It's just that I lost my inspiration. But today, I was reading OceanUP and JEMI is officially on! I can't believe they got together even after the countless times Demi went on with her famous "We're just best friends. It's never gonna happen." YEAH RIGHT. It did. She confirmed it!**

**But anyway, I think I found my inspiration again. I'm starting on the official Chapter 20 (even though this author's note is taking its place for now) and it should be up within the week or two, depending on my school schedule.**

**As a final note, I'd really appreciate it if you could ask all your Smitchie-loving friends to check out this story. I briefly looked over it and I'm not a big fan, but it'll give me motivation to write better and faster.**

**Xoxo Jackie**

**Oh yeah, this is completely random, but I met Maya Kibbel online… Not a fake account, because we were both fans of this band and we got talking & I got her phone number so we text each other. But like, she even called me so we could both confirm the other wasn't some creepy old guy. IT'S HER. It's completely weird, but yeah, I'm friends with Maya Kibbel. O.o**

**AND MY FORMSPRING! www(dot)formspring(dot)me/lovecommajackie**

**Ask me anything; I promise to answer honestly.**


	21. Stephen

**Sorry this isn't very long! My computer crashed and I lost all my documents so I had to retype this...Anyway, enjoy!**

I climbed out of bed and put on one of Shane's old Nirvana shirts.

"Where you going?" Shane asked groggily as I pulled on some shorts. He was still in bed, half asleep.

"I'm meeting up with Stephen for coffee. You don't mind, do you?"

It took a moment for him to answer. He slowly pulled himself into a sitting position. "No," he said slightly hesitantly, "I'll take care of the kids. We're probably going to be at Jason's later. Meet us there?"

I nodded and pulled my stuff together.

On my way to Starbucks, I suddenly became oddly nervous. This guy was my first boyfriend. I haven't seen him in about two years and he was probably in college now.

When I walked into the coffee shop, I looked around; there weren't any familiar faces so I ordered a cappucino and sat down at a small booth. I was quietly sipping my drink and checking my email when someone tapped me on the shoulder.

I looked up to see a very tall guy with broad shoulders and an unmistakable grin. It was Stephen, but he looked so different.  
I stood up to greet him with a hug.

"It's been so long! How have you been?" I asked.

"I've been great."

"That's good to hear. Actually, that's fantastic to hear."

I sat back down when he slid into the other side of the booth. I noticed that he got rid of his highlights and his hair was much shorter now. He also cleaned up fairly well.

"How about you? How are things going with your life?"

I couldn't help but smile. "Things are going really really good for me."

I got distracted for a second as someone brought his drink to him. It was kind of odd seeing as that was the first time I ever witnessed a worker at Starbucks bring a drink to a customer at their seat.

"So are you in college now?" I asked, making polite small talk.

He shook his head. "I was there for like a semester, and then I dropped out."

"May I ask why?"

"No you may not." He went completely straightfaced for a moment and then broke out in a chuckle. "It was because of personal issues. College just didn't feel like it was where I belonged. Just wasn't for me, I guess."

"That's understandable."

"What about you? Are you planning to go to college?"

I had to think for a moment. "Probably not. Shane and I talked about it the other day. It's not like we have any financial issues right now...I mean, we got paid three quarters of a million just for an interview and photoshoot with the kids."

His jaw dropped. "I know Shane rakes in quite a lot of money, but seven hundred and fifty grand? For like, four to five hours tops?"

"I know. It's crazy. But yeah, maybe when the kids are older and Shane picks up his music again. I might get bored, so I don't know. I'll probably go to college when I'm thirty just so I'll have something to do," I joked.

"Sounds like a good life. How are your kids? Beth and...Ryan, right?"

"Yeah. They're healthy. I can tell Beth is the loud one who loves attention. Ryan, on the other hand, is just a peaceful baby. I love them both so much."

Stephen smiled. He stared out the window with a blank expression.

It got completely silent in our booth.

I decided to break the silence. "So what really made you contact me again?"

He whipped his head back and looked as if he just snapped back into reality. "Well...it's a long story."

I looked around me quizzically. "Does it look like I'm going anywhere?"

He nervously twiddled his thumbs. "Okay, well, my psychiatrist suggested that I fix anything that might be causing me guilt."

"I'm...causing you guilt so you're here to...fix me?"

"No no no, the way I treated you. It's self provoked guilt."

I nodded slowly.

"I guess this is the time to apologize. I'm really sorry if I ever caused y--"

I cut him off. "Hey, if you never did the things you did, I probably wouldn't have gotten with Shane. In turn, that would've meant that I would be living a normal life right now, but I honestly can't imagine life without Ryan and Beth. They are the best gifts in the world. Everything happens for a reason."

He shrugged. "I suppose."

"Wait, did you say your psychiatrist suggested this?" I asked, recalling what he said before.

"Yeah."

"Why do you need a psychiatrist? You don't have to tell me if you don't want to. I get it."

"I got into some pretty bad things and then I became severely depressed. I tried committing suicide a few times," he said nonchalantly.

I was taken aback. "I'm so sorry I wasn't there to help you though all that."

"Seriously? After the things I did when we were still together? I didn't deserve your mercy or your friendship."

"Don't say that..."

"It's true. Plus, you had your own issues with the pregnancy and everything."

"Yeah, I guess. Does your psychiatrist just prescribe you with anti-depressants?"

"Yeah, and pills to help with my condition."

"What condition?"

"I tried overdosing on sleeping pills, but it screwed up my brain chemistry or something...but yeah, the meds I have to take daily to reverse it cost a fortune."

It was quiet for another few minutes because I didn't know what to say. Quite frankly, I was in shock.

"So are you living with your parents now?" I wondered.

"No, I'm living with my uncle Rob. My parents kicked me out of the house after the second time I got arrested."

"Oh."

"Rob is dying. He has pancreatic cancer, and since he only has a few months to live, there isn't any surgery or procedure available that's even worth a try... He's paying for all my pills and his house is already mortgaged out so when he does die, I'll have nowhere to go."

I wrote down my new number on a Post-It and handed it to him. "You can always call me."

Stephen tried handing it back to me. "I'm not here for that. You were my best friend and I missed you. That is all. I'm not here to ask you for money or shelter or anything."

"I know you're not. I'm offering."

As soon as we both finished up our drinks, I invited Stephen to go to Jason's house with me. He agreed to go and followed my car.

When I walked into the house, I could hear them playing Rockband in the basement.

We walked downstairs and almost simultaneouslly, Nate, Shane, and Jason grimaced at the sight of Stephen. Taylor, however, ran toward Stephen's open arms.

"Steve! I've missed you so much!"

**I will be more likely to post faster if you review ;)**


	22. UPDATE CONTEST!

Hey guys...I know this chapter has been LONG overdue, but I'm really busy and I don't have any time at all for FanFiction anymore. :(  
Buttttt. I do know that some of you guys are writers and you're trying to get your stories on FF more popular (especially if you're a Camp Rock fanfictionist...idk if that's a word, but whatever, haha) and I thought of a way to give my readers what they want, and a chance for some of you to put your name out there. Continuing from the last chapter, I will now open up a contest for whoever wants to write the next chapter of this story. You can take the story wherever you want, and each chapter can -but doesn't have to- be written by different authors.

Now of course before anyone jumps into this, you'll probably want to know the benefits.

This story has 231 reviews, 18,976 hits, it's been favorited by 62 people, and 97 people have it on their story alert. Whoever writes the next chapter (which I will post on here) WILL receive full credit for their creativity and hard work. It's almost like an advertisement for your User page. If people like what they see, they WILL go onto your page and read your stories. You also get to be a part of this story, permanently :)

CONTEST ENTRY RULES:

1) You must leave a review on this "chapter" containing the following:  
-your name -your age -why you think you should be chosen to write the next chapter -why you WANT to write the next chapter -why you like this story 2) You must have this story on your favorites, story alerts, and I must be on your author alerts (which doesn't make much of a difference since I don't really even use FF that much anymore)

I'm going to give this a month for all entries to get in. September 16, 2010 is when I'll announce the winner on my author page, and I will contact them through PMing on how to get their chapter in. Details for future chapter authors following this upcoming chapter will be further discussed in the future.  
Good luck!

Oh, and it'd be greatly appreciated if you could follow me on tumblr: fashionedbyfate(dot)tumblr(dot)com


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